What is up with this girl?

[El Don]

There is a girl that I was friends with for a little over a year. I started to like her recently and she just got single again for good after being off an on with her ex of 4 years. We hung out before several times with one of my good friends which is her best friend and at the time I didnt have any feelings for her. We went out to lunch the other day and I asked her out and made it clear it would be a real date and not just hanging out as friends and didn't know how she felt about that. She told me she had no problem with going out and it being a date.

This was last week. She got sick recently with pharyngitis and on top of that her best friend which is also my good friend moved away to south carolina so im sure she is depressed. I had hung out with her and my friend before he left to say goodbye and she didn't really show any interest at all. Even though I had asked her out and she said she had no problem with that she has not really shown to much interest because I would think she would be more into me now that I had asked her out. She usually is one to just be straight up and tell it how it is so if she wasn't into me why wouldn't she just LJBF me. I dont know if its that she isnt much into me or if its because her best friend moved away and she is sick.

 

[RogueWarrior]

Just a thought here but she said she'd go on a date with you and call me crazy but you just might want to do that.

If she's in a foul mood, you'd better make it something really fun. You're 21 so try a comedy club.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Going from friends to dating is a bit awkward, but give it a chance and see what develops - nothing ventured equals nothing gained! Just don't be desperate in your attempt and don't feel bad if you are not compatible! Dating is a mere formality to determine if two are romantically interested in each other - no obligation!!

 

[El Don]

I had talked to her to ask her out earlier this weekend and set up a date but she works late and told me she would be closing on sunday when I was available. She told me she would get back to me but never did even to tell me she couldn't go out. I am not contacting her until I hear from her again because I dont understand the telling me we could go out yet shes not even calling me back.

 

[Last Man Standing]

You did your job as a man - you initiated and indicated interest - your job is done! The ball is in her court!!

 

[Monkey]

I dont understand the telling me we could go out yet shes not even calling me back.

Whats the confusion? She has little to no interest in you.

Judge women by their actions, forget what they say.

 

[kdnash82]

If I had known any better, you were already in the LJBF's zone. In fact.. Find another woman and it might peek her interests.

 

[JJMcLure]

Sounds like low interest level but she probably wants to remain "friends" (particularly as you have some shared friends), and is hoping you take a hint and drop the matter. Chicks are often terrible at communicating no interest and guys are often not so good at picking up on chicks' "hints" - because they expect a clear rejection.

Not too sure how you went about the date suggestion (you say you "let her know it would not just be as friends" and "not sure how she felt about it") - sounds like there could have been a bit too much verbalization. I.e. don't tell her your feelings, just get her on a one-on-one date and have fun and let/make things happen. Telling her those things puts pressure on her to make a snap decision and suddenly (re)evaluate her feelings, chick's hate pressure and they will always bail!

At least you gave it a shot and made your intentions clear, good on you for that. Now move on.

 

[J-Bone]

same old thing it happens daily. the best advice is find another girl and stop talking to her for a little while and I don't mean 20 minutes but more like days to a few months and she might become interested, if not, then you saved alot of time and effort and you've gained another experience point for trying.

 

[El Don]

thanks guys for the advice. Even though I like her a lot I am going to move on now since its probably obvious now what the deal is. Thanks again for the replies