What is the most difficult part of meeting/attracting women

Dean Gladwyn

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 19, 2022
Messages
48
Reaction score
25
Age
44
Location
United Kingdom
1. Initial approach (approach anxiety and haze)
3. Knowing what to say
3. Transition anxiety (getting physical or moving to an instant date)
4. Asking for the number
5. Building chemistry and connection
6. Flake prevention
7. Beginning a sexual relationship

What are your personal struggles/sticking points guys?
 

Stanley

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 6, 2022
Messages
1,130
Reaction score
1,329
dfsdf for sure

EdIt: Hey what happened to the poll? I wanted to know what dfsdf was!
 
Last edited:

NealIRC

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 4, 2023
Messages
797
Reaction score
154
Age
36
Getting approached by them is the hardest.

Girls usually go places with other people, so.
 

CollegeMan22

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 9, 2021
Messages
256
Reaction score
351
Everything is pretty smooth for me, except the transition from getting their number to getting them on the first date. I have roughly a 3/4 dropout rate at this stage. Lots of non responders or women who are “busy” (not interested).

Do you guys have any advice for improvement at this stage? I do day approaches, I flirt and tease em a bit, get them to laugh some, learn some basic sh!t about her, tell some stories. Then I ask if she likes nature….. “yes” ….. then I ask if she’s heard of this park near my campus. Usually they say no and I tell them its cool features, then I directly say “We should go there sometime” with strong eye contact. Then I try to schedule a date at night, with no BS texts in between.

Advice for improvement?
 

Stanley

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 6, 2022
Messages
1,130
Reaction score
1,329
Everything is pretty smooth for me, except the transition from getting their number to getting them on the first date. I have roughly a 3/4 dropout rate at this stage. Lots of non responders or women who are “busy” (not interested).

Do you guys have any advice for improvement at this stage? I do day approaches, I flirt and tease em a bit, get them to laugh some, learn some basic sh!t about her, tell some stories. Then I ask if she likes nature….. “yes” ….. then I ask if she’s heard of this park near my campus. Usually they say no and I tell them its cool features, then I directly say “We should go there sometime” with strong eye contact. Then I try to schedule a date at night, with no BS texts in between.

Advice for improvement?
From the post i've read of yours you seem to go for 'the kill' quickly, nothing wrong with that, but you are likely to get girls to drop off earlier on you. If you are forward or even pushy and the girl gives you her number it doesn't necessarily mean she is of adequate interest. Girls when pressured will give out their numbers or socials opposed to outright rejecting you. Women dislike direct confrontation and feel safer hidden behind a phone. If you are struggling to transition from number to date there is likely a lack of rapport, chemistry or genuine interest. If this is a girl you hardly know you've got to be a bit more patient and willing to let things unfold and cultivate a bit. Up to you how long you are willing to do that though. Regardless, the answer is interest level, the bright side is you can build interest in one another, but it takes nuance and time.

The direct mode one style approach makes interest levels abundantly clear from the get-go though, but you will get more rejection often than not. It depends on the context, the girl, and what is you are after.

 

manfrombelow

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
1,759
Reaction score
2,257
Age
34
The hardest part to me is the approaching a.k.a getting through her defensive barriers. Always!
 

Giovanni SouthSide

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 5, 2022
Messages
616
Reaction score
787
Age
33
Location
Tijuana, Mexico
Female retention. Keeping her interested on her heels till you bag her.
texting off the handle she gets bored.
distant/cold she has other options.
Striking a balance can be a crutch
After the banging cool as ice
 
Last edited:

Dean Gladwyn

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 19, 2022
Messages
48
Reaction score
25
Age
44
Location
United Kingdom
Everything is pretty smooth for me, except the transition from getting their number to getting them on the first date. I have roughly a 3/4 dropout rate at this stage. Lots of non responders or women who are “busy” (not interested).

Do you guys have any advice for improvement at this stage? I do day approaches, I flirt and tease em a bit, get them to laugh some, learn some basic sh!t about her, tell some stories. Then I ask if she likes nature….. “yes” ….. then I ask if she’s heard of this park near my campus. Usually they say no and I tell them its cool features, then I directly say “We should go there sometime” with strong eye contact. Then I try to schedule a date at night, with no BS texts in between.

Advice for improvement?
This could be something technical or it could be your general vibe.

Do you mind if I ask you what your day to day life and activities look like?
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,449
Reaction score
10,662
1. Initial approach (approach anxiety and haze)
3. Knowing what to say
3. Transition anxiety (getting physical or moving to an instant date)
4. Asking for the number
5. Building chemistry and connection
6. Flake prevention
7. Beginning a sexual relationship

What are your personal struggles/sticking points guys?
Of these options, I would say 1 & 6 have caused these most problems for me over the years.
 

Barrister

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 28, 2018
Messages
2,473
Reaction score
4,191
Age
37
Probably #6 -- because it is generally out of your control.

First, flakes before a 1st date are unavoidable. Women are such capricious creatures that there is really no preventing it no matter what you do whether you subscribe to rapport building or setting up the date and saying nothing more. Second, I have even had 1st dates that I have knocked out of the park and even got a lay out of and for some unknown reason she flakes the next round. Now, the second is very rare, but it happens.

At the end of the day, women have a variety of reasons or sometimes no reason for flaking. You can only do things to lessen those chances, but it is never at 0.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,449
Reaction score
10,662
Probably #6 -- because it is generally out of your control.

First, flakes before a 1st date are unavoidable. Women are such capricious creatures that there is really no preventing it no matter what you do whether you subscribe to rapport building or setting up the date and saying nothing more. Second, I have even had 1st dates that I have knocked out of the park and even got a lay out of and for some unknown reason she flakes the next round. Now, the second is very rare, but it happens.

At the end of the day, women have a variety of reasons or sometimes no reason for flaking. You can only do things to lessen those chances, but it is never at 0.
It's a good idea to reduce pre-first date flaking and also to avoid "one date, no sex, no 2nd date" type interactions. "One date, no sex, no second date" interactions are quite common from using swipe apps.
 

NealIRC

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 4, 2023
Messages
797
Reaction score
154
Age
36
As an incel-virgin, I would say the hardest part is getting into a girl's friendzone. As in, they still would not strike a convo with you, if they saw you a 2nd or 3rd time, provided you talked to them the 1st time.

I said before I don't do nightclubs since I don't drink, need 8 hours of sleep, and going solo looks bad. I do a lot of approaching at the beach. I hand out atheism pamphlets. But not to conservative-dressed girls at the beach, but the type that wears thongs and such. I'm from Chicago, and since after Adam Toledo was killed by the police, and the George Floyd protests, my new line is "do you know anyone killed by the police before?" But this is not used on White women, only Hispanic girls. And the type of Hispanic girls I approach are usually the 1s involved with gangs. But, like all convos with women, they never ask me any questions. The convo ends when I run out of questions, and walk away. The beauty is if you find reoccuring people at places like beaches, since I hand out a lot of documents that can fascinate people.
 

kavi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2022
Messages
725
Reaction score
622
Age
39
Actually meeting them in a place where socialising is the norm.
 

We_ArE_VeNOM

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2022
Messages
1,025
Reaction score
811
Age
39
1. Initial approach (approach anxiety and haze)
3. Knowing what to say
3. Transition anxiety (getting physical or moving to an instant date)
4. Asking for the number
5. Building chemistry and connection
6. Flake prevention
7. Beginning a sexual relationship
None of those things were ever a struggle for me...however..

What are your personal struggles/sticking points guys?
Rejection.

No man wants or likes to be rejected.

I can close the deal with 9/10 women, but that one rejection will still STING.

All you can do is..

1. Continue improving yourself and thereby placing yourself in the best position to succeed.
2. Be a quick healer (recover quickly from any strike against your self esteem/confidence).
3. Stick to your principles, then it becomes more about you, and less about THEM.

Then it will be all gravy, baby.
 
Top