What is the best thing to say if you don't want to talk about work?

[Canadien]

I have been really working hard at being great conversationalist by following lots of self help programs, yet, there are some topics that just brings out negative frame set, and work is one of them, so how do I tell the girl about stopping the the topic, and not get too much deep into it..

I don't mind talking about work, yet there are just so many good thing outside that I just don't see the purpose for inflicting a negative mind set, especially if work is performance related...

Should I just change the girl, if she's too much serious about her career, and not so much about enjoying and having fun...

How do you guys handle, work related conversations?

 

[WC2]

Does she just talk about herself? Women love to talk about themselves, but theres a certain line to be drawn. If she isn't making any motion to talk about you in the least, then move on.

If she doesn't ask you about your feelings, she's just unloading hers on you and in a sense just using you.

 

[Canadien]

Ya thats

Does she just talk about herself? Women love to talk about themselves, but theres a certain line to be drawn. If she isn't making any motion to talk about you in the least, then move on.

If she doesn't ask you about your feelings, she's just unloading hers on you and in a sense just using you.

exactly how I feel...

She is from France, and is concerned that her life is become routine, and how she only talks to four people other then me, and how much dedicated she is to her career ambitions, yet nothing is panning out, and somehow only career seem to matter to her,

I'm trying to create fun interaction yet her unwillingness to reciprocate makes me feel even worse, and to make thing worse I got 5 other girls waiting in line after her..

And, I'm like walking fun with my new found Donjuan and player image, I just don't feel like holding back for anyone, yet my old nature of being "nice guy" always lets me down..

 

[Poonani Maker]

exactly how I feel...

She is from France, and is concerned that her life is become routine, and how she only talks to four people other then me, and how much dedicated she is to her career ambitions, yet nothing is panning out, and somehow only career seem to matter to her,

I'm trying to create fun interaction yet her unwillingness to reciprocate makes me feel even worse, and to make thing worse I got 5 other girls waiting in line after her..

And, I'm like walking fun with my new found Donjuan and player image, I just don't feel like holding back for anyone, yet my old nature of being "nice guy" always lets me down..

That's good that you're shedding your old image. I would give her you best piece of golden advice for her in her job. If she overlooks it or doesn't consider it with much thought, I'd drop her and move onto the next girl. Helping a girl with her career is a good way to bed them. She'll grow attached to you for being her "source" of beneficial information on what to say and what to do in the workplace. Good advice comes from good listening.

 

[kidkris2007]

Well, I went to a presentation on this topic and El Topo from Mystery's Bootcamp said that you should tell it in a different light than normal. Turn common questions like this into a way to DHVing yourself through STORY:

Ie. If your a mechanic and she asks what you do say something like, "Well when I was a kid I was always taking things apart and was curious about how they worked. I was always taking my dad's power tools apart and he would get mad at me for it blah blah blah....so hear I am today working and taking apart cars, can you believe that?" Use any excuse to build up yourself through stories. Depending on where you are in the interaction, childhood stories are a good way to build comfort, or even DHV by describing your ambition for what you work on.

This question always comes up, answer it in a different way than she's used to hearing.

 

[WC2]

exactly how I feel...

She is from France, and is concerned that her life is become routine, and how she only talks to four people other then me, and how much dedicated she is to her career ambitions, yet nothing is panning out, and somehow only career seem to matter to her,

I'm trying to create fun interaction yet her unwillingness to reciprocate makes me feel even worse, and to make thing worse I got 5 other girls waiting in line after her..

And, I'm like walking fun with my new found Donjuan and player image, I just don't feel like holding back for anyone, yet my old nature of being "nice guy" always lets me down..

Sounds like a typical successful wannabe. Not to sound too harsh, but one of my ex's was just like this. Most the time she was very ambitious and wanting to do well, but she never really made it. She wanted to be very successful, but when it came down to it she didn't have the stuff.

What's worse is that these women will talk about it for lengths on end to make themselves feel better about themselves. If she is doing this once in awhile, no problem. But if this is a constant mode of conversation and she doesn't bring you into the equation, again, drop her. No matter how hot or smart a woman is; if she isn't showing interest, she's no good to me.