"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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What is her deal?

brenbaus

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So, I go to my old HS's football game tonight, becuase there were no parties going on in tha AUG, and who do I see but my supposed "best friend", at least that is what she says. So I am standing with the band, because I am a band alumni, and wanted to check them out. To get to the stands where you can sit and watch the game, you have to walk past the band section of the stands, and she walks right by me, smiles and gives me "the look", and then just keeps on walking, didn't even say Hey or give me a hug or anything. Just wondering what you fine gentelmen think about this? I am thinking about giving her the silent treatment for a few days. Is that AFC of me? Do you think I am over reacting to this situation?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Wyldfire

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I don't hug my friends everytime I see them. Basically, she sees you as a friend because that's all you've tried to be while you're viewing her as your girlfriend.

If you want to be more then make your intentions clear instead of pretending to be a friend in hopes of her waking up one day and being your girlfriend miraculously. Stop analyzing so much and make a move if you want to be more than friends.
 

brenbaus

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OK, she just called me (its like 1am here) and I ignored the phone, I'll probably call her tomorrow. Does anyone have any advice on what I should say to her? The reason I am making such a big deal about this is because today was the day we meet a year ago, and we were supposed to hang out or some shiot, but she never called me back about it, and then she just blows me off like that. Maybe I am just over reacting to her BS
 

brenbaus

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
I don't hug my friends everytime I see them. Basically, she sees you as a friend because that's all you've tried to be while you're viewing her as your girlfriend.

If you want to be more then make your intentions clear instead of pretending to be a friend in hopes of her waking up one day and being your girlfriend miraculously. Stop analyzing so much and make a move if you want to be more than friends.

I dont see her as my GF, because shes just not my type, but in her tradition, I am supposed to hug her every time we see each other. I used to be really attracted to her (shes like a HB8), maybe I am dwelling on those feelings instead of what I really feel for her?
 

Alphathree

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Next her for your own good.

OR make a move and then next her if/when it backfires.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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brenbaus

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I dont wanna next her because I like the friendship. but i dunno what to do
 

brenbaus

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no one else want to contribute?
 

RoeCyris

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i've never remembered the 1 year anniversary of meeting a "friend" before and I sure as hell didnt celabrate it. but maybe thats just me.

if u wanna test the watters try this. get a lil drunk together (doesnt have to be u 2 alone, could be at a party or whatever) and then just say in a curious way, "you know, in the last week or so, I've started to see you in a way i never have before..."

and leave it at that. Let that thought sink into her head and see where she takes it.


good or bad, thats my advice.
 

Julian

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why didnt you pick up the phone. maybe she wanted a late night **** session.
 

brenbaus

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the only reason I remembered it was because she called me yesterday and goes:

her: Do you know what today is?
ME:no, I dont, other than thursday
her:today is the first thursday of school
me:so, what does that mean?
her:Today is the day we meet last year!
me:Is it, really (like I am gonna remember that on my own, only a woman would remember that, I would remember the first time we fvcked, but not the day we meet)

I dont understand why she made such a big deal about it last night and then wont even speak to me today?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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brenbaus

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Originally posted by Julian
why didnt you pick up the phone. maybe she wanted a late night **** session.

She wont fvck me, she wont even kiss me, says it would be like kissing her brother. But shes been flirting alot more lately (she flirts alot, but not this much in along time) Maybe its because I've been using ALOT of kino on her the last couple of times i saw her
 

RoeCyris

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Originally posted by brenbaus
She wont fvck me, she wont even kiss me, says it would be like kissing her brother.
I think ur done with this one. The topic has already come up at some point and she said THIS. That, my friend, is the kiss of death.
 
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