"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

what is a "creep"?

wannabesuave

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 21, 2008
Messages
22
Reaction score
0
What exactly is a creep, and how do you avoid being one?

Recently I had a horrible experience which made me feel like the girl thinks I'm a "creep", yet I'm still not exactly clear on what it means.

Sure, I'm pretty introverted... that's not my fault - it's a freakin' temperament that I was born with and can do little or nothing about. I suspect that introverts are labeled creeps by extroverts, who are the majority in our society.

Any thoughts on this term, what it means, and how to avoid being perceived as one?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

MotownMack

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
373
Reaction score
11
Sure, I'm pretty introverted... that's not my fault - it's a freakin' temperament that I was born with and can do little or nothing about. I suspect that introverts are labeled creeps by extroverts, who are the majority in our society.
I think you've defined it.

I wasn't always outgoing in larger social gatherings either, and I think the number one way to get labeled in that way is by being a "lurker".

If you're in a social gathering, especially with friends, you need to make an effort to talk to the people, and do it soon. Learn some stories to tell, some interesting conversations, and even if they aren't the best, you still won't be labeled as the creepy guy who is always "hanging around". You don't have to talk to them forever or be the most charming guy they ever met-just be social, ask some questions, and make some conversation so they feel like they know you.

You are absolutely wrong that you can't change it. I am probably twice your age, and I have learned stuff from SS that I have already applied and changed.

Oddly enough, being a lurker was one of these. I am pretty outgoing and rather outspoken at times, but after reading some of this stuff (and some other materials), I learned I was still kind of a lurker at times.

I immediately stopped doing that. I make an effort to talk to people who may not even be that interested in knowing now, just to get more vested in the social circle. They will become warmer towards you, and it will help you later when people come along that you are interested in.

You're introverted primarily because you lack confidence. The best way to start getting some confidence, in your case, is to stop lurking. I promise you that peoples reception to you will change almost immediately.
 

ChrizZ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2006
Messages
2,028
Reaction score
27
wannabesuave said:
What exactly is a creep, and how do you avoid being one?

Recently I had a horrible experience which made me feel like the girl thinks I'm a "creep", yet I'm still not exactly clear on what it means.

Sure, I'm pretty introverted... that's not my fault - it's a freakin' temperament that I was born with and can do little or nothing about. I suspect that introverts are labeled creeps by extroverts, who are the majority in our society.

Any thoughts on this term, what it means, and how to avoid being perceived as one?
someone who is not honest about his intentions.
 

SinJester

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2007
Messages
1,226
Reaction score
44
Location
Australia
Someone who lacks social skills.

Someone who isn't authentic (see what ChrizZ said).

Someone who is too far out from the 'social norm'.

Someone who doesn't have the confidence to back up what he is saying doing (being inauthentic).

I disagree with the notion that introverts are born. Especially after watching The Blueprint Decoded. Let me ask you this, are you always introverted/shy/quiet or just in large groups? Do you act the same around your close friends or family?

What was your horrible experiance that made you feel like a creep?

When we first begin to integrate new characteristics into ourselves it often comes accross as 'creepy' because it isn't yet authentic. Authenitcity with it comes through repetition as it becomes a part of us.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Maxtro

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2004
Messages
3,198
Reaction score
31
Location
Kalifornicatia
Basically somebody is creepy when they are different from the norm. If you don't talk as much most guys or you are not as loud, you are creepy.

It also means because of what you are doing you are perceived as low value. Find some ways to raise your value and you can stop being creepy.

As for raising your value, I'm in the process of doing more research on that as I need to raise my own value.
 

MotownMack

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
373
Reaction score
11
When we first begin to integrate new characteristics into ourselves it often comes accross as 'creepy' because it isn't yet authentic. Authenitcity with it comes through repetition as it becomes a part of us.
This is statement is gold, and is pretty much something that you can use in any area of your life.


What was your horrible experiance that made you feel like a creep?
I was curious about this too. What happened?
 

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,197
Reaction score
140
An introvert isn't necessarily creepy. An extrovert can also be creepy.

A creepy guy is the guy who hesitates (dictionary: to be reluctant or wait to act because of fear, indecision, or disinclination) and doubts himself. He appears incongruent. His external behaviours and actions don't match what's inside.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
3,739
Reaction score
41
Age
45
Location
-777-Vegas-777-
Creepy guys do things that most people would not concider socially accpetable. I'll give some extreme examples to nail the point home for you.

If you collect hair from a girl you like but don't know and fashion it into some kind of picture or doll...yeah that's creepy. If you stay up late and cruise the neighborhood you live in, that's cool. If you just cuise the same block over and over again hoping the girl you have a crush on will come out side...yeah that's creepy. If make plans with a girl you barely know or see, then immedately assume you're dating and plan your days around the minutes or so of that interaction from there on...yeah that's creepy. If you get her number and txt or call 14 or more times more then she calls you... yeah that's creepy. If she tells you never to see or talk to her again and you think she's "playing games"...oh my god that's f*ckin creepy!!!

You catch the overall message here. If you can think of something that seems bizarre and outside the norm in a scary way, anyone who does something similar is creepy. Remember, a PUA is never a creepy individual. Keep your emotions and urges under control by keeping your cool. Everything else will work itself out.
 

jigga23

Banned
Joined
Feb 23, 2005
Messages
313
Reaction score
0
ive been called a creep or weird. but then ive been called ****y and arrogant. so i got both ends of the spectrum. to me when i go out i will only talk to someone if im in the mood. if i dont it means im tired, bored and just dont care about the person and dont like putting in the effort.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Joined
Dec 18, 2007
Messages
376
Reaction score
18
wannabesuave said:
What exactly is a creep, and how do you avoid being one?



Sure, I'm pretty introverted... that's not my fault - it's a freakin' temperament that I was born with and can do little or nothing about. I suspect that introverts are labeled creeps by extroverts, who are the majority in our society.

Any thoughts on this term, what it means, and how to avoid being perceived as one?
Actually I believe more than 50% of it is learned behaviors. You learn to be shy. Which is a form of vanity. You focus it all on you. It's all about you.

How you feel introverted and YOU can't do anything about it...it is just the way YOU are.

I used to be like that too until I grew up and grew out of that bullcrap,.

It is a matter of how badly you want it.
 

DarthAngel707

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2008
Messages
162
Reaction score
2
Location
Hawaii
wannabesuave said:
What exactly is a creep, and how do you avoid being one?
If you don't know the answer to that question, you probably are one. But kidding aside, a creep is anybody who is socially awkward, doesn't understand social cues, play too much World of Warcraft...:D But, it's all about perception, you don't think your a creep, but many sociable people and girls alike will think so if you exhibit the behaviors above.
 

azanon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2006
Messages
2,291
Reaction score
41
wannnabe,

Realize that sometimes people have perception problems. Just because you might get called a "creep" doesn't (necessarily) mean you are one.

I'm reminded this moment of that guy Paul Janka who was on TV recently for his gaming of women in NY and having slept with over 100 women. In the comments section below, comments ranged from "way to go, teach me!" to "wow, what a creep, he should be arrested".

In the bible belt where I live, it'd probably be common to get the occasional creep accusation as a DJ. Many of the women here are extremely conservative.

The accusation most DJs should get from time-to-time is a$$hole. In fact, I'd go so far as to say if you've never been called that at least once or twice, you're probably still too much of a "nice guy".
 

randalll

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 31, 2008
Messages
174
Reaction score
0
Location
London
Maxtro said:
Basically somebody is creepy when they are different from the norm. If you don't talk as much most guys or you are not as loud, you are creepy.

gotta say i disagree with that, i know two guys who are both quiet and never really start conversations with others. but they are good guys and are respected by people

but in some cases, yeah i think creeps are often quiet

nothing like this is black and white, just depemds on the person
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

DonJuan11

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2007
Messages
1,667
Reaction score
35
PRMoon said:
If you collect hair from a girl you like but don't know and fashion it into some kind of picture or doll...yeah that's creepy.
LOL. If you can get close enough to her to get some hair she may consider you a DJ.
 

ketostix

Banned
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
3,871
Reaction score
55
What being a creep essentially means is someone doesn't like/understand you and it's their contention you should not be a sexual creature. Why they don't like you usually centers around you being quiet and not friendly and personable to them. The fact that "creep" means a hundred different things and it's not universally clear is just evidence that it really isn't based upon anything of substance.
 

azanon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2006
Messages
2,291
Reaction score
41
ketostix said:
What being a creep essentially means is someone doesn't like/understand you and it's their contention you should not be a sexual creature. Why they don't like you usually centers around you being quiet and not friendly and personable to them. The fact that "creep" means a hundred different things and it's not universally clear is just evidence that it really isn't based upon anything of substance.
Again, sometimes they're actually the weird or quirky one. To a stuck-up, sheltered, bible-thumping, daddy's girl, I'll always be a creep in her mind.

Usually's too strong a word, IMO. "creep" is misused by the accuser approximately half the time in my estimation.
 

Enryu

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
114
Reaction score
0
how can you have fun when you dont get called freak or weird or stupid at least twice a day?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Top