"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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What if...

2nd_Chance

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What would you think if your EX (that you still like) and you work with, gets pissed when you talk about other girls? What if she gets mad if you try to change your appearance? What if she Kinos you a LOT, but constantly swears that she doesn't like you? What if she is pissed because you delete her phone number? What if she smiles at you a lot, and keeps eye contact? And when you mention looking for a new job (which means you won't see her anymore), she gets mad and tells you not to?

IDK. I am crazy about her, but we broke up, because she said she didn't feel the same way about me. She said right now she is too busy with life and doesn't have time for a boyfriend, but we would try again later. I didn't speak to her for a while, but she was so hurt I decided to be friendly, even though I still have feelings for her.

Does she dig me? Or what? Playing hard to get? Ego trip? IDK??? She is the most complicated person or girl that I have ever been with... EVER. But I am crazy about her...
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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ducaro

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welcome johnson. welcome to the world of sosuave. many times your questions may not be answered, but I believe you will emerge a new and powerful person, free of gender issues very soon. promise. Stick around and read, read and read.
 

Grizou

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The same happened to me with my ex-girlfriend this year. I must confess I absolutely adored her. It always takes me a long time to fall for a certain women, but then this girl had me on the hook. Long story short, we split up because she wasn't sure about her feelings and I was fed up with taking the crap. Now that was when a very similar situation to yours emerged and I risked to lose my "natural" happiness because I could not get off that bloody hook of hers.
Don't be her fish, she's just playing with you. As long as she can enjoy the benefits of your attention she will do that. I took me quite a while to bring my own s... to an end, but after all it made me feel so much better. Yes, she gave me the "we should try some years later on"-line too, yes I liked the thought of this coming true. But that's just not worth it.

A fish should swim freely and not constantly be pursuing the bait.
 

2nd_Chance

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Haha, almost exact same thing. Wow. In fact, thats how I am, it takes me a while to fall for the girl, a long while. Soon after I did she started this crap.

I like the fish analogy.
 

DonJuan11

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2nd_Chance said:
She said right now she is too busy with life and doesn't have time for a boyfriend, but we would try again later.

I doubt she would say that if you looked like Brad.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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2nd_Chance

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DonJuan11 said:
I doubt she would say that if you looked like Brad.

I know that, but thats not the point. Simply put- is she interested NOW (not back then) or is this all just an ego boost for her. I mean, I don't understand why she cares how I look, what I do, and if I mess with other chicks as long as I give her attention... but she does. It just tells me she is still interested :-\ But I totally see Grizou's point as well.
 

Grizou

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The thing is, if you stick around her too much any longer, you can be sure she'll have some other guy coming around, which will give you a nice feeling of being afc and, thus, will give you a ****ty time.

I know of myself, I would still have feelings for that girl. But my feelings are based on illusionary hopes of getting the girl back that she was during the good part of our relationship. That's never gonna happen! So I don't take the initiative of calling/contacting her. The sooner you forget her, the easier it will be to have fun with someone else.
 

KingCobra

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HA HA this is exactly what has just been happening with me, we broke it off, i still love her but that doesn't go away in a month, it takes time but she was giving loads of mixed signal, keeps wanting to see me, flirty texts all the time etc, i've just started a period of no contact which i feel is vital! mixed messages mess you up in the head and you need time to clear your mind and move on even if that seems a far out possibility at the moment, no contact for a week and i guarentee you it will seem easier. ignore messages,calls,facebook any of that crap but you may want to tell her you are doing it if you want to be friends further down the line but if not then screw it and just do it without telling her
 

IceCream

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Ah! ex-girlfriends, ex- girlfriends, ex-girlfriends...

Ignore her completely, its a waste of time. Ex's are Ex's for a reason, do not forget why the two of you broke up!
 
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