What if you can't?

[kcraptor82]

Okay, so like I dunno if my last post got deleted or what, but sure the heck no showing. Mostly I was ranting about how my life sucks. Anyways, so what can a 27 year old male that lives in a worthless town do? Online dating has gotten no where. I have tried for two years to talk to women online, and haven't talked to a single one. This is really getting me down. I am tired of being alone and tired of being depressed about it. I am not a needy person, and I do have standards, but not too picky. Just tired of this I can't even talk to a woman. My job sucks, no one comes in that is attractive and if a woman does, well they are married or taken. My social life sucks also. My friends don't know anyone, I blame their past relationship or they are married and have no social life either. So I am stuck being single the rest of my life or what?

 

[S. Pryor]

If you had no home, no food, no clothes, limbs missing, voice gone THEN you could say your life sucks. All of the things you mentioned can be fixed. When you say you've tried online dating are you saying you've just never actually met the women you're talking too? If your job and town sucks that bad then what's stopping you from moving away?

 

[The Piano Master]

Is their a local community college nearby? A DJ I know takes an acting class at a CC and he says that it supplies him with all the b'itches he needs. Plus, the acting class will help you become more social.

A meager acquaintance of mine is trying it next semester. I'll get back to you if he avoids disaster.

 

[Warrior74]

Move or take weekend trips to the nearest big city. Try going some place new every week in your town or in another nearby town. if the mountain won't come to Muhammad, Muhammad must go to the mountain.

 

[horaholic]

Whats keeping you in this town?

 

[The Piano Master]

Whats keeping you in this town?

Good point, bro.

 

[sodbuster]

Grab your balls[if you have them] and change your life. Move to a bigger town, get a better job,get a better education,find a gym. QUIT whining like a woman.

My dad first said that to me when I was 10. Put your hand between your legs. Feel a pair? well then act like you got them.

 

[ENIGMA16]

Okay, so like I dunno if my last post got deleted or what, but sure the heck no showing. Mostly I was ranting about how my life sucks. Anyways, so what can a 27 year old male that lives in a worthless town do? Online dating has gotten no where. I have tried for two years to talk to women online, and haven't talked to a single one. This is really getting me down. I am tired of being alone and tired of being depressed about it. I am not a needy person, and I do have standards, but not too picky. Just tired of this I can't even talk to a woman. My job sucks, no one comes in that is attractive and if a woman does, well they are married or taken. My social life sucks also. My friends don't know anyone, I blame their past relationship or they are married and have no social life either. So I am stuck being single the rest of my life or what?

Ok, first off your biggest problem is one that you can't even see. Your problem is with none of these things really but with yourself. You are projecting your low self esteem onto other things so that you don't have to face the fact that you are the problem and how you view yourself is what needs to be fixed. Granted, changing some of these things will help that, but it will not majorly affect how you view yourself.

But let's go through this list:
1. I live in a worthless town.
Solution: Move.
2. Talking to women online hasn't worked.
Solution: Talk to women in real life.
3. I am tired of being alone and depressed about it.
Solution: Learn to accept yourself so that you are not depressed with yourself. You will either be alone or be in an unhealthy relationship until you can accept who you are and be proud of yourself (i.e. respect yourself).
4. My job sucks.
Solution: Get a different job. Go to school if you absolutely must.
5. My social life and my friends suck.
Solution: Get new friends! Be more social!

Do you see what the problem is here and why people here have little tolerance for you? It's because you seem to be blaming everyone and everything else when in reality you have the power to change all of it yet you haven't. If you hate your job so much then why are you still working there? If you hate where you live then why haven't you moved? If you don't like your friends then why don't you get new ones?

Seriously, this is all in your power. What have you done about it? If you took all this energy you're using to whine and moan and be depressed, you could change it all. Stop whining, get up off your ass and do something about it.

 

[edger]

Online dating has gotten no where.

The only online dating(although people say they're only on there for for "networking and friends" which of course is bullsh*t), that will get a guy anywhere, is MySpace...that's only if you have women leaving you IOI's(Indicators of Interest) on your comment's and picture page's. Some guys here will also swear how other sites like(and I'm just throwing random crap out there)Match.com, OkCupid, PlentyOffish, etc. have worked wonders for them. But what I do know for sure is, sites like Match and PlentyOffish, did sh*t for me. You'll hear people here say it, the real world(clubs/bars) is the best place to look, if you're looking to score women.

 

[kcraptor82]

I understand where all of you are coming from on this? But what if no matter what you do, it just doesn't seem to work? I have no problem with myself. I know I am smart, etc. I know I am not the best looking person. And if I do have low self esteem, its because the female race is to blame. Everytime I have tried to get involved with a women, they pretty much just use me, etc. I haven't really had a female want me. I view myself just fine.

1. My Town - Yes it does suck, and the solution to move. Well wish I could, but would not be smart. Need to be here 2 more years for college. Tuition rates are cheaper here then anywhere else.

2. Talking to Women - Well sure online hasn't worked, tried it because I can't talk to them in real life. Hello, why would I be online if real world was working?

3. Being depressed - Yes, so what? Not depressed with myself. Depressed of seeing other people with women, and I can't seem to get a single one to talk to me.

4. My Job - Well would be stupid of me to just quit and look for another job. Hello, job market sucks. Our economy is crap. Everyone laying off. Sure lets quit my job!

5. My Friends - I love them. They are my family and keep me sane. Someone to talk to about problems, etc. Now getting new friends would be nice, and I totally agree, but hello, haven't I stated this before, I can't seem to do that atm. Might get better when I start school thou? Hard to be more social when there is no opportunity.

These are not excuses for why I am still here, etc. I have valid reasons, and yes I do blame other people. If a female on this planet could show me that they weren't all so worthless, I would think different. But in the mean time, I am very negative about it. Can't help it. Women have done this to me.

 

[CarlitosWay]

I understand where all of you are coming from on this? But what if no matter what you do, it just doesn't seem to work? I have no problem with myself. I know I am smart, etc. I know I am not the best looking person. And if I do have low self esteem, its because the female race is to blame. Everytime I have tried to get involved with a women, they pretty much just use me, etc. I haven't really had a female want me. I view myself just fine.

1. My Town - Yes it does suck, and the solution to move. Well wish I could, but would not be smart. Need to be here 2 more years for college. Tuition rates are cheaper here then anywhere else.

2. Talking to Women - Well sure online hasn't worked, tried it because I can't talk to them in real life. Hello, why would I be online if real world was working?

3. Being depressed - Yes, so what? Not depressed with myself. Depressed of seeing other people with women, and I can't seem to get a single one to talk to me.

4. My Job - Well would be stupid of me to just quit and look for another job. Hello, job market sucks. Our economy is crap. Everyone laying off. Sure lets quit my job!

5. My Friends - I love them. They are my family and keep me sane. Someone to talk to about problems, etc. Now getting new friends would be nice, and I totally agree, but hello, haven't I stated this before, I can't seem to do that atm. Might get better when I start school thou? Hard to be more social when there is no opportunity.

These are not excuses for why I am still here, etc. I have valid reasons, and yes I do blame other people. If a female on this planet could show me that they weren't all so worthless, I would think different. But in the mean time, I am very negative about it. Can't help it. Women have done this to me.

If you are nothing you will attract nothing....I think that saying holds a lot of weight. Be proud of the fact you're going college. Sounds like you have some goals/purpose and I'm sure in school you'll have plenty of opportunites to spark up a couple chics.

****s not working out for you right now...but let me ask how is being hard on yourself helping your situation any more?

Not the best looking guy? Well make up for it by greatly improving other aspects of you (social skills, story telling, humor, inner sexuality)

You sound like those lazy fat people who come on the internet and say "I'm fat, but I don't want to be fat no more, I need motivation HELP ME!" Guess what most of them remain the same until they get a big rude awakening.

 

[dude04]

Grab your balls[if you have them] and change your life. Move to a bigger town, get a better job,get a better education,find a gym. QUIT whining like a woman.

My dad first said that to me when I was 10. Put your hand between your legs. Feel a pair? well then act like you got them.

you dad sounds cool. is he a don juan?

 

[Ice882]

Okay, so like I dunno if my last post got deleted or what, but sure the heck no showing. Mostly I was ranting about how my life sucks. Anyways, so what can a 27 year old male that lives in a worthless town do?

Move.

 

[horaholic]

You're in COLLEGE. There are girls there. You're depression is causing you a lot of limiting beleifs. Handle it first and foremost. Do whatever you gotta do to feel better about yourself. Work out. See a therapist. Get on meds. Read Tolle. Go to church. Whatever. this needs to be the #1 factor of improvement in your life. No girl wants to be with a depressed bummer guy.

 

[r0cky]

Read this:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=169167

 

[sodbuster]

Never asked him about his dating life,but he was pretty hardnosed. He spent a couple years in the army,doesn't take much guff from mom etc. I just think he's an old school man that most today have forgotten how to be[course he's 73 now].