what happens when you back off

[Lvdegen]

let me start off by saying I've been spoiled my whole life so my impulse control is out of wack and I will try to get whatever i want from all angles. i never really give up on anything I want and I have usually get what I want if i want it that bad.

too long to get into details but we knew each other 4 months and lived together part of that time...she had to travel back to her state to do some stuff and we ended up getting into while she was gone. well it got messy to the point where she wanted it done I said and did messed up things and so did she.. even though from a locigal stand point she was the one doing the most while I was just calling her out and reacting..we were fine together living together but when she was away it's a different story just a different person.

so she got fed up and I chased texted but nothing messed up. i never called her phone never blasted texts for hours maybe just a few texts like once every 4 days would test her out so how she wo8ls react to certain things I texted...anyways she stopped replying which is not shocking. but never did i say anything messed up just saying what's ur problem get over it etc...like I said not shocked about the no response but she's just stupid...so the last thing I wrote was let's just be friends come back try it out etc.

yes I talk to other girls and she knows I know hot girls shes seen me with them so she knows who i roll with kind of why sh1t hit the fan to begin with.

after the last text I told myself I'm done with her no more texting her for like 3 months or ever again possibly lol.

so what does a girl do when a person backs off takimg into account how I was acting?

I've always felt the need to be persistent...i got into with a girl I knew before for a long time and the fight we got into was so bad we didn't talk for 5 months. i would text and she wouldn't respond or just say f off etc...i literally thought we would never ever speak again ever...well low and behold one day I texted her sporadically and she made up with me and now we never have problems etc...so in my mind I feel peresiticnce can pay off as long as ur not blowing up their phone every day..and I haven't even called not one time...i text like once every 3 days sometimes a week. but yes I talk to other girls and hang out with them but I want this one to move back in...im gonna give her plenty of space regardless at this point..just curious how they react when someone in my position takes away all attention from them.

 

[btownbuck2012]

let me start off by saying even though from a locigal stand point she was the one doing the most while I was just calling her out and reacting..we were fine together living together but when she was away it's a different story just a different person.

MAJOR red flag

so she got fed up and I chased texted but nothing messed up. i never called her phone never blasted texts for hours maybe just a few texts like once every 4 days would test her out so how she wo8ls react to certain things I texted...anyways she stopped replying which is not shocking. but never did i say anything messed up just saying what's ur problem get over it etc...like I said not shocked about the no response but she's just stupid...so the last thing I wrote was let's just be friends come back try it out etc.

Reaching out to her radio silence with a "lets be friends" text placed the ball firmly in her court. Whatever type of frame or confidence you had with her is gone now. Unfortunately, with her ego and the amount of options she has, you're no longer a man in her mind. You're a weak guy. I'm not saying that's what you actually are. Don't get me wrong. But you lost all the power here.

so what does a girl do when a person backs off takimg into account how I was acting?

Even if you wouldn't have gone beta with the "lets be friends" text, she still would have most likely moved on. @Urbanyst said it best a few weeks back when he said that nowadays if you bang a chick, you've won. You CANNOT expect them to hang around forever in the name of commitment or love. They simply are not wired like that ESPECIALLY when they have so many options and men drooling over them. I am convinced that it is nearly impossible to MAINTAIN anytype of long term and meaningful relationship with a woman raised on social media and with a healthy serving of feminist empowerment on the side. Banging them is victory. Did you bang this girl? If so, you won.

 

[Lvdegen]

MAJOR red flag

Reaching out to her radio silence with a "lets be friends" text placed the ball firmly in her court. Whatever type of frame or confidence you had with her is gone now. Unfortunately, with her ego and the amount of options she has, you're no longer a man in her mind. You're a weak guy. I'm not saying that's what you actually are. Don't get me wrong. But you lost all the power here.


Even if you wouldn't have gone beta with the "lets be friends" text, she still would have most likely moved on. @Urbanyst said it best a few weeks back when he said that nowadays if you bang a chick, you've won. You CANNOT expect them to hang around forever in the name of commitment or love. They simply are not wired like that ESPECIALLY when they have so many options and men drooling over them. I am convinced that it is nearly impossible to MAINTAIN anytype of long term and meaningful relationship with a woman raised on social media and with a healthy serving of feminist empowerment on the side. Banging them is victory. Did you bang this girl? If so, you won.

the ljbf text was a test to see what she would say. I'm not being serious and I don't think she would actually think that because with our dynamic it's either together or not talk at all...no way we could be friends.

 

[wifehunter]

Backing off is always a good thing. Because, if she's hot, she's busy beating chodes off with a stick.

Your power should not be wasted on women, anyway. Find something constructive to do, like building a better life for yourself, and those around you.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Reaching out to her radio silence with a "lets be friends" text placed the ball firmly in her court. Whatever type of frame or confidence you had with her is gone now. Unfortunately, with her ego and the amount of options she has, you're no longer a man in her mind. You're a weak guy. I'm not saying that's what you actually are. Don't get me wrong. But you lost all the power here.

It's ALWAYS best to go NC and STAY NC--no matter what. In many cases, they will circle back, but it could be months. Most of mine do but I DON'T break NC--ever.

 

[Dash Riprock]

You CANNOT expect them to hang around forever in the name of commitment or love. They simply are not wired like that ESPECIALLY when they have so many options and men drooling over them. I am convinced that it is nearly impossible to MAINTAIN anytype of long term and meaningful relationship with a woman raised on social media and with a healthy serving of feminist empowerment on the side.

I'm not in total disagreement with this, BUT...

It is in a woman's pre-wiring and DNA to settle and nest as opposed to spreading her genes around like a man. This is a proven evolutionary fact. Just look in nature: the female of a bird species is always of camouflage plumage so she can blend in with her surroundings as to not draw attention and be attacked. It's the woman that usually (99% of the time) nurtures and cares for kids and on and on so she's wired as more of a homebody not an agent of conquest (men). It's no different with our species from a DNA or "wiring" perspective. MOST women hate dating and most will confide they are looking for ONE MAN to be with. They just cannot find him due to all the betas, jerks, and losers they have to go through. Ask any good woman and it's frustrating for them too. The women who do have all sorts of options and orbiters you can bet have a major internal civil war going on in their head everyday. They think "the game" is fun on some level but would probably much rather hang exclusively with one cool dude instead.

So, I think a solid relationship or LTR CAN be had with a hot chick if you remain DJ. The ones that don't react to the DJ mindset are simply too far gone to get involved with anyway, so no big loss. But the crazy, f*ucked up ones certainly don't constitute the majority of all women. We just hear more about them on this forum. Kind of like the morning traffic report: you hear about all the crashes and rollovers but not about everyone who makes it to work safely and on time. People love a trainwreck.

Cheers,

Dash

 

[btownbuck2012]

I'm not in total disagreement with this, BUT...

It is in a woman's pre-wiring and DNA to settle and nest as opposed to spreading her genes around like a man. This is a proven evolutionary fact. Just look in nature: the female of a bird species is always of camouflage plumage so she can blend in with her surroundings as to not draw attention and be attacked. It's the women that usually (99% of the time) nurtures and cares for kids and on and on so she's wired as more of a homebody not an agent of conquest (men). It's no different with our species from a DNA or "wiring" perspective. MOST women hate dating and most will confide they are looking for ONE MAN to be with. They just cannot find him due to all the betas, jerks, and losers they have to go through. Ask any good woman and it's frustrating for them too. The women who do have all sorts of options and orbiters you can bet have a major internal civil war going on in their head everyday. They think "the game" is fun on some level but would probably much rather hang exclusively with one cool dude instead.

So, I think a solid relationship or LTR CAN be had with a hot chick if you remain DJ. The ones that don't react to the DJ mindset are simply too far gone to get involved with anyway, so no big loss. But the crazy, f*ucked up ones certainly don't constitute the majority of all women. We just hear more about them on this forum. Kind of like the morning traffic report: you hear about all the crashes and rollovers but not about everyone who makes it to work safely and on time. People love a trainwreck.

Cheers,

Dash

Solid comment. Agreed. Although I haven't experienced such a woman.

 

[Glassguy]

Why would you live together in such a short amount of time? That is mind boggling to me.