What exactly is it that you are scared of when it comes to women?

[Warrior74]

You don't have to post it..but the question is do you really know what you are afraid of? Until you actually know what you are afraid of you can't fix the problem. Take some time and figure out what exactly you are afraid of and then get to work on getting over it.

 

[Tyson420]

I used to have this fear, this was the reason why I couldn't approach a random stranger and hit on them.

I was only afraid of what they would think, and still to this day when I approach I become self conscious of how I look, do I look good? How does my t-shirt look, what about my jeans. While I still do it now, in the end I still approach.

Not giving a **** is easier said than done, unfortunately.

When I was much more afraid back then, I would approach, then walk away half way. Like a lame, this was 3 years ago in High School. Think Superbad and McLovin eyeing a girl with a thong then walking the opposite direction when she turns around.

 

[moneyisking]

I don't know what I am afraid of. That's most of the problem. And second to that, maybe just not knowing wtf to say. But when I am happy, I usually do well.

 

[Poonani Maker]

My biggest fear? Her seeing my place. I don't keep it clean/fixed up like I should because I'm in limbo looking to move. I wouldn't Dare bring her back to my place, and I know that that's the Best place to take her back to, your place. That's my ONLY fear. I've got to get my sh!t together and find a new place. I'll find one, but when I talk to the landlord/lady, I get suspicious and they ALL seem shady, so I keep searching for a landlord I can Trust. It's hard.

 

[ElCubanito13]

my biggest fear is getting into the dreadful LJBF zone......
don't go there :nono: :nono:

 

[Daruff12]

I used to be afraid of rejection and akward pauses in conversation.

Now I'm afraid of being looked at as a creep for hitting on too many women.

 

[CASON]

How can I get rid of her ex?

Ok I met this girl earlier this year and she had a boyfriend of almost two years. Their relationship was in trouble because he convinced her to go back to further her education and between work and study not much quality time. I work with her so we spent a lot of time together and I liked her a lot. She ended up saying she felt she was having her relationship with me and cheating on me with her boyfriend. We started seeing each other. He ended it with her about a week later.

Now it's been like seven months and I love her. BUT, she has contacted her ex-boyfriend. She says to me that he was a big part of her life and who she has become and she needs him around. He was not interested. She kept trying. Now he's began responding and decided to try and salvage a friendship.

I had some friends try to scare him off of her and he beat them both up at the same time. This guy is going to become a part of my girlfriend's life soon and I'm terrified he'll find out she and I were having an affair.

How can I get my girlfriend to cut him out of her life? Or get him to go away? He has no right to be back in her life he broke up with her.

 

[Blood Angel]

Making her uncomfortable. I have Asperger's Syndrome so I can unintentionally say or do things that make girls uncomfortable around me. After I did it the first time I realized that there's no worse feeling in the entire world than having people scared of you.

 

[Slashco]

Like everyone, I was afraid of rejection, but (and this may sound weird) for a long time I think I was more afraid that she'd say 'yes'. Why so, you ask? Well, if she shot me down, I was done and could go back to my normal life. But if she agreed to take things further, it meant changes in my life, a new set of responsibilities, new things to take care of, and basically moving out of my comfort zone and into the unknown. I think this is why I went through a 'loner' period where I hardly initiated contact with anyone. It was only after I began to know myself and gained courage and experience in social situations that I started moving out of that mindset.

 

[Tyson420]

Like everyone, I was afraid of rejection, but (and this may sound weird) for a long time I think I was more afraid that she'd say 'yes'. Why so, you ask? Well, if she shot me down, I was done and could go back to my normal life. But if she agreed to take things further, it meant changes in my life, a new set of responsibilities, new things to take care of, and basically moving out of my comfort zone and into the unknown. I think this is why I went through a 'loner' period where I hardly initiated contact with anyone. It was only after I began to know myself and gained courage and experience in social situations that I started moving out of that mindset.

I only had this fear in 8th grade, I didn't care or want to go out with any girl. I asked a girl out only when I was pressured, and I would do it half heartedly as if I didn't want to get into these new responsibilities, they sensed that and instant LJBF me. I was grateful for that.

My goal now is to **** all the girls I couldn't back in High School. I already did one, she had a son already lol I feel bad for her.

 

[women haze]

My only fear is..Not knowing what to say? I don't want to seem boring.....there in lies rejection. You feel me?

 

[Demystify]

My fear is being the guy that they use for attention instead of being the guy they put out to. I don't want her to hookup with some wild bad boy right in front of me to make me more interested in her. I would rather not know her at all than be the guy that she just uses for attention and doesn't put out to.

 

[Duffdog]

My fear is being the guy that they use for attention instead of being the guy they put out to. I don't want her to hookup with some wild bad boy right in front of me to make me more interested in her. I would rather not know her at all than be the guy that she just uses for attention and doesn't put out to.

This one is easy to fix. Just BE the wild unattainable guy that all the other girls want and she won't do that to you.

 

[Demystify]

This one is easy to fix. Just BE the wild unattainable guy that all the other girls want and she won't do that to you.

I don't really know how to fix that. I have a nice guy look that I can do nothing about. Believe me I've tried to change my look. I look like a nerdy gay guy no matter how I change it.

 

[zekko]

"Scared" isn't the right word, but I do have some concerns when it comes to women, I notice they mostly relate to myself:

1) I'm concerned that I am getting close to the age where I will no longer be considered attractive/hot/dateable by attractive young women.

2) I get worn out working all the time. I'm concerned that my energy level will not be what I want it to be when I need to put out a fun vibe.

3) I'm concerned I may run out of interesting conversation. This relates directly to #2, if I'm tired I may not feel like talking or may not be as sharp coming up with things to talk about. If I'm feeling energetic it's not usually a problem.

What is it with girls anyway? Are they lousy conversationalists or what? They come into my office and just sit there and don't say anything. So I have to come up with stuff to talk about to keep the conversation going. Being a man means bearing a lot of burdens.

 

[Tyson420]

"Scared" isn't the right word, but I do have some concerns when it comes to women, I notice they mostly relate to myself:

1) I'm concerned that I am getting close to the age where I will no longer be considered attractive/hot/dateable by attractive young women.

2) I get worn out working all the time. I'm concerned that my energy level will not be what I want it to be when I need to put out a fun vibe.

3) I'm concerned I may run out of interesting conversation. This relates directly to #2, if I'm tired I may not feel like talking or may not be as sharp coming up with things to talk about. If I'm feeling energetic it's not usually a problem.

What is it with girls anyway? Are they lousy conversationalists or what? They come into my office and just sit there and don't say anything. So I have to come up with stuff to talk about to keep the conversation going. Being a man means bearing a lot of burdens.

This is what I don't understand, it just leads me to believe ****ing them is all their good for.

 

[mrRuckus]

I fear getting my hopes up and then having them destroyed. I usually prefer just not to go through the hassle. 3 dates and then she pulls the ol' vanishing act? I'd have preferred not to have thought she was really interested to begin with than deal with the disappointment.

I fear what comes out of her mouth. She's great and fun and I just know any second some bullcrap will come out of her mouth about the time she made out with a guy when her boyfriend was driving the car up front or how she recently broke up with a guy and she's still talking to him and trying to be friends. They seem to have little fear of spilling the beans about bad things they've done as if it's completely normal.

 

[Duffdog]

I don't really know how to fix that. I have a nice guy look that I can do nothing about. Believe me I've tried to change my look. I look like a nerdy gay guy no matter how I change it.

I don't think you have tried as hard as you say you have. There are so many ways to not look like a nerd... just pick something you like that isn't nerdy and you will be fine.

If you can't do this, you will end up being the typical office guy who silently turns 40 and just sits at home and watches movies till his life expires.

Here, Ill pick one for you: Start rockclimbing. Most rockclimbers are nerdy looking skinny guys anyways, you will fit in perfect.

 

[#41]

My only fear is..Not knowing what to say? I don't want to seem boring.....there in lies rejection. You feel me?

This.

And the little voice in the back of my mind ("You're annoying her," "Just give up, if she was interested she'd be showing it," and "Who gives a sh¡t about that, that's a boring topic,") that yells loudly when I'm making awkward conversation about nothing on an approach.

 

[wt_firefighter]

My biggest fear isn't the rejection itself, but the idea of seeing that person again if I do get refected. The school I go to only has about 14, 000 students, so the possibility of seeing her is pretty high actually. And when I go to the bars, it seems that I always see the same people there.

I also agree with slashco, I am kinda scared she might say yes. And right now I have a pretty good life and I don't know if I want to mess that up just to have a girlfriend or not