"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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What do you think?

Jeremymichael

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Hi Guys,

Been doing the internet dating recently and had a date on Friday.

We arrived at 18:30 hrs (she suggested meeting for a drink) and I ordered two glasses of wine - one for her and one for me. The meeting went well (I thought) and we engaged in good conversations, I thought she was giving me a lot of eye contact. I noticed she was drinking slowly and when she had nearly finished I said "would you like another drink, or something to eat?", to which she sad that she had to leave at 20:00 hrs (I forget why) and we continued to chat. At about 20:15 hrs I went to the gents and thought how should I handle this because I had finished my drink too but she hadn't made a mention of leaving. So we were both left looking at each other with empty glasses. Eventually at 20:30 she said I have to go now, so went our separate ways and she gave me a kiss on both cheeks and said "we'll be in touch". I then went home via train and got very delayed (another story that one).

Anyway I text her the next day and said "Hope you had a good time and hope you got back safely". To which she replied "Thank you coming to see me and good luck in Sweden next week (work)".


Not sure on this one, should I follow up or not, would like to see her again. Was a bit put out that I had travelled to London for the date and it sort of ended quickly. Maybe a dating scam?. Oh one thing she did do was throw in a conversation line about some condom firm that was on Tv last month and had I seen it?, maybe a pull from her.

Not sure what to think?.

Thanks,
Jez
 
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"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Jeremy,
How lovely to read your mail,you are the archetypal nice guy,considerate,gentle,caring...So where did it get you Old Chap?...She finds you boring...When you met her did you hug her in your arms,then tell her how much nicer she was in person than in the photos,how much you had been looking forward to meeting her?...No...Thought so...When you sat at the table,did you have a few jokes ready to tell her,how long before you held her hand,put your arm around her shoulder,massaged her back,pulled her towards you?...did you ask how she managed to stay so slim?she must work out?..Of course you sat side by side,her on your right,you playfully nudged your leg against hers,she had a ring on her finger,so you picked her hand up to look at the ring and suggested there must be a story behind this...You had of course an agenda to escalate this memorable meeting...a Bottle of Baileys in the fridge,sexy music on the Hi-Fi...subdued lighting..lavender scented sheets?...No I thought not...You were an upright,English Gentleman,being what Women pretend they are looking for,your Mum would be proud of you,sadly they have always wanted a cad...Still I respect you Jeremy...Guys like you are the salt of the Earth!
 

SAYNO

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Wow really? No escalation even after she brought up the condom topic? :yawn: I may have replied something like this: "so whats your favorite type of condom; color or flavour?" Or "why do they make them so small, hard to find one that fits!!" (Said with a big grin on your face). :yes:

The name of the game is to escalate, build momentum, intrigue and mysteify then boom, she's dropping them panties like hotcakes..:rockon:
 

Jeremymichael

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Thanks Guys, I thought it a bit strange on a first date, so didn't think to react. Thinking about it, on another date, the women mentioned something about " did you know on my last date the guy asked whether I had sexy underwear on?" and I took it that she was horrified. I failed on that one too as later she said she felt tired and had to go home. I've got it now though.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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TheCWord

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Espi said:
I personally believe that the DJ ends the date--always. He LEADS and she FOLLOWS. I never want to hear her saying, "I gotta get going." In my mind, I've overstayed my welcome when I hear that. ]
I've been guilty of this on the phone recently. :( Been seeing a girl who lives out of town so we'll chat on the phone some to stay in touch. I never call and I only answer her calls if i have nothing else to do - but that could be a problem: I just lie on the couch and shoot the sh!t with no real reason to get off the phone, I'd just watch TV otherwise. So the result is she ends up ending the convo first. I know it's bad form, Espi.
 

TheCWord

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Espi said:

Well, maybe it is bad form, CWord, but just keep this in mind: in my opinion there's a HUGE difference with a chick you've been seeing for awhile, versus one with which you're still in the early phase of courtship (i.e. the first 2 or 3 dates).

After I've established a solid, lengthy relationship with a plate (which is very rare for me), then I'm OK with texting back and forth, spending time on phone conversations, etc.

But it certainly never hurts to be the one who is willing to walk away first. THAT is the person with power, in my opinion. He who is willing to walk away first usually wins.
Good stuff to consider. Thanks.
 

Jeremymichael

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Hi Scaramouche, always appreciate your input, and nice one Sayno - get your drift. Let's face it first dates are always difficult and nobody is perfect. I appreciate your input.
 

Jeremymichael

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got a text tonight saying, she thought me as a friend, Bad news,,, feel down, must be ugly. If only she knew, I'm an intelligent fun guy and likes a drink and am fairly good looking. Have to work on my game.
 
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