"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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What did she mean when?

B

bankai

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I'm not sure how to take the conversation that we had. What are your thoughts? What do you think she meant by the drawn out "suuuurreeee"?

Conversation goes as follows

*after a few minutes of banter*

me: anyways, I called to see if you wanted to do something later in the week.
her: ah ok, what were you thinking of?
me: I don't know, movie, dinner, something like that. There were some places I've been wanting to try.
her: uh suuuuurrreeee.
me: ...you don't sound very sure about that,
her: it's just since I've been back I don't know what movies are out and I've eaten everything that I've been craving for.
me: *jokes* erm I'm not going to comment on that last part. How about this, I'll figure something out and I'll give you a call back and we'll see how you're schedule is later in the week.
her: ok!
me: alright, I'm off, talk to you later.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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W

WhitePimp

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Be more decisive. None of this 'maybe/possibly/don't know' stuff when talking about possible dates. Be firm and direct with your plans to minimize flaking
 
V

vatoloco

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bankai said:
...How about this, I'll figure something out and I'll give you a call
Click to expand...
This should've been your plan to begin with. ;)

You gotta be a "Man with a Plan."
 
M

Mike32ct

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I agree with the other posters. Have it figured out (time/date and place) before you call her. You should have a primary and a backup plan ready. If it helps, write it all down before you call her.

The backup plan is important because you might first suggest some restaurant she doesn't like or a movie she already saw, etc. You don't want to go quiet if she shoots down your first suggestion.

Never say "I don't know" or "What do you want to do?". It's weak.

Get it all figured out and call her again in a day or two.
 
Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

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She doesn't sound very interested. Women will very rarely give you a direct "no." They think ambiguous excuses are much more polite.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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T

trrush

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yeah i don't think she's interested much in you. even if you had a plan, she would have flaked.
 
R

rocket87

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Lack of interest. Lack of decisiveness. Fail.

Learn how to attract. Become more decisive. Don't banter. Don't waste your own time. Win.
 
J

Johnnyventana

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Lack of interest aside -- people need to stop ruining the 'set-up!' Have a plan and tell her what it is. That's fun for you both. The hemming and hawing is ghey and totally ruins the moment. In fact, it becomes tedious. Not exactly what you want.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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P

Pimp-sicle

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All the others have pretty much summed it up.

Also she was being sarcastic when she said "surrrrrrrreee" because she knows you want her, yet you were trying to reason and say there was some movies and different food spots you wanted to try.

This is not looking good for you. Part of your issue is the indecisiveness, comes off as not being sure of yourself, insecure etc etc.

Even though this doesn't look promising start by practicing good habits.

Call her back, and have something planned out, set time etc. Be flexible and have two different days as options. If she can't make either, and doesn't counter offer, you know the truth.

Worst case scenario she doesn't answer or call back





PIMP
 
R

runner83

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Pimp-sicle said:
Call her back, and have something planned out, set time etc. Be flexible and have two different days as options. If she can't make either, and doesn't counter offer, you know the truth.

PIMP
Click to expand...
If a woman is interested, she WILL make time to meet up.

Of course, being a wishy washy wvssy (as per your side of the messages) can kill any attraction that was there to start with
 
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