"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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What Chicks are worth....?

STR8UP

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jophil28 said:
Geez, now that you put it that way...

Perhaps it could also be said this way.. The loss of a boyfriend is judged to be less than the loss of a girlfriend even if that girlfriend just shafted her friend.

The sisterhood in action ?
Which goes to further support my theory that men are much more invested in most relationships, women get over a breakup more quickly, and men "grieve" for a longer period of time.

To women, men are expendable.

And replaceable in 2.3 seconds.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Colossus

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STR8UP said:
Which goes to further support my theory that men are much more invested in most relationships, women get over a breakup more quickly, and men "grieve" for a longer period of time.
I agree with this. I think women fall more quickly, but men--once invested emotionally--have a much longer and harder 'grieving' period.
 

Colossus

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STR8UP said:
When she finds a squeeze, she will squeeze you out. Firstly because she no longer has any use for you, secondly because people tend to gravitate away from friendships (even some same sex friendships) they get into a relationship, plus the issue of respect for their mate.

Nikki and I actually hung out this weekend and had this very discussion. I tried--nicely--to explain this to her, but she was in complete denial that she would do this if she were to get a bf.

In a sense I am very much her surrogate boyfriend. I am so sure of this I would bet 2 week's salary that when (not if) she does land a regular bf, her stance towards me will go from borderline needy to friendly ambivalence.

This might sound AFC on my part, but the difference is that 1) I do not want to sleep with her, 2) I do not have any ulterior desires of a romantic relationship, and 3) we share common interests and mostly have a fun time. It's a symbiotic friendship.

But, sometimes chick friends are a pain in the as$. Her jealousy is already starting to come out again now that she knows I'm dating a girl I like. She was all emotional this whole weekend because she thinks I am "abandoning her". I'm going to do my own thing for a couple of weeks and let her simmer down.
 

edger

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Colossus said:
I think women fall more quickly
I have in the past, fallen for women rather quickly. AFC's will fall for women just as quick as a woman will fall for a guy. Come on, look around you in society, look at the forum. I think it's about equal in terms of who falls for who more.
 
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