hi, all ive been a long time reader of the forums and have used alot of the tips on here, i dont post much, but i feel this is very important.
Ironically this post is derived from my passion, philosophy; and it relates to one of the main topics of debate about picking up women.... Being Yourself.
Now from what i see, on the forums, the idea of being yourself to pick up girls is often shot down, instead notions of confidence, ways to build self-esteem, and careful ploys to get attention are advertised as "the" way to get girls. I began thinking about this and began wondering how effective these really are. I mean we can all attest to things such as working out to build our self-image and using lines or techniques to attract women, but what i have noticed that what "real" Don Juan's have that ordinary guys dont is that they can be themselves.
Why be yourself? you may ask. My answer: Can you really "be" anything else?
Why play these courtship games and do things that we do not want to do? Why put up an image or some impression on a girl that you want that isn't you. If she doesn't figure it out, then eventually its gonna eat at you till you just break up over stupid differences.
Be who you are and you wont feel any anxieties about the situation, you wont feel any anxieties about how you appear to this girl or what to say or anything, because if you are just who u are then you know that you aren't acting in bad faith with yourself as you would be in if you used a line.
Being Yourself projects confidence, it seems like people are giving out ideas to be confident, saying do this or do that, if you are who you envision yourself to be then there is nothing to fear right? You cannot be anymore ( because you can be that which you are not ); or be any less ( can negate your own self unless through bad faith )
I have found this to work out, i just recently had a situation where i fell for this girl was the afc did what i thought she wanted me to and not what i wanted to and the opportunity passed me by... 2 months later i finally just siad f*** it and just acted myself around people i began to really hate the image that i put up; and almost instantaenously i found a chick
Remember this; DJ's are born, not made.... you can only become what you already are, so just be yourself!
Ironically this post is derived from my passion, philosophy; and it relates to one of the main topics of debate about picking up women.... Being Yourself.
Now from what i see, on the forums, the idea of being yourself to pick up girls is often shot down, instead notions of confidence, ways to build self-esteem, and careful ploys to get attention are advertised as "the" way to get girls. I began thinking about this and began wondering how effective these really are. I mean we can all attest to things such as working out to build our self-image and using lines or techniques to attract women, but what i have noticed that what "real" Don Juan's have that ordinary guys dont is that they can be themselves.
Why be yourself? you may ask. My answer: Can you really "be" anything else?
Why play these courtship games and do things that we do not want to do? Why put up an image or some impression on a girl that you want that isn't you. If she doesn't figure it out, then eventually its gonna eat at you till you just break up over stupid differences.
Be who you are and you wont feel any anxieties about the situation, you wont feel any anxieties about how you appear to this girl or what to say or anything, because if you are just who u are then you know that you aren't acting in bad faith with yourself as you would be in if you used a line.
Being Yourself projects confidence, it seems like people are giving out ideas to be confident, saying do this or do that, if you are who you envision yourself to be then there is nothing to fear right? You cannot be anymore ( because you can be that which you are not ); or be any less ( can negate your own self unless through bad faith )
I have found this to work out, i just recently had a situation where i fell for this girl was the afc did what i thought she wanted me to and not what i wanted to and the opportunity passed me by... 2 months later i finally just siad f*** it and just acted myself around people i began to really hate the image that i put up; and almost instantaenously i found a chick
Remember this; DJ's are born, not made.... you can only become what you already are, so just be yourself!