What are your thoughts on DJ friends and AFC friends?

[xsonik]

I know that people usually have both AFC and DJ friends. I just wanted to know what you guys thought of hanging around them when there are potential HBs around. Sometimes, when I am around my DJ friends, I feel overshadowed and out DJed by them. On the other hand if I am with my AFC friends I tend to either make them look bad or slightly bend back to an AFC myself. Maybe I just need new friends or something, or I should only DJ by myself.
-Ron

 

[ScrewIt]

yea its tough on your part. where you stand, u are in between the 2.
if u dont wanna fall back into AFC, i suggest not hanging witth that crowd. ppl of similar interests/personalities usually fall into a crowd.

if u wanna be more dj hangout with ur dj crew, it reinforces you to be more dj. get what i mean?

lets say u suck at soccer, and u play against a guy taht sucks too, how much better will get at exceling in the game compared to playiing against someone that's on an average skill level. the idea is you're being challenged and are forced to excel in that area.
you know the answer.

if u dont like being overshadowed nor falli nto afcness, i suggest djing on your own as it forces you to be more independent.

 

[Dukester]

ya, i have AFC friends and DJ friends. my friends that i would label as DJ arent as outgoing as I am though.

My one friend and I- it's kinda funny- we have a competition when we hang out. We both try to get the girl's number, or we take turns on which chick to get.

When i'm w/ my AFC friends, I'm my normal DJ self, and if they dont like it tough. It's their loss.

All in all though, I like to DJ by myself. I still DJ girls when I'm with my friend Nick, cuz I just met him in August, so I dont know him that well. He is a RAFC/DJ. He works on girls in a different way, and when he sees me do my method on chicks in the cafeteria or something, we just joke a/b it when i come sit back down.

We all have good times, and laughs.

 

[ScrewIt]

Originally posted by Dukester

When i'm w/ my AFC friends, I'm my normal DJ self, and if they dont like it tough. It's their loss.

thats also something u gotta watch out for, most afc friends wouldnt appreciate it and get jealous of you and many times they will try to put u down to make you stop djing. thats a major problem about djing with afc friends.

 

[Dukester]

very true screw it. i've noticed that they do get jealous. i dont care tho- my friends know i usually get the chicks, and i let them know that if they have a prob w/ it, then they need to do something about it.

usually, if i value the friendship, i try to convert my AFC friends into RAFC or a lower DJ status than me- the rest is up to them.
Never give this site out to anyone though!

 

[ScrewIt]

Originally posted by Dukester


usually, if i value the friendship, i try to convert my AFC friends into RAFC or a lower DJ status than me- the rest is up to them.
Never give this site out to anyone though!

hahah yea. but remember dont force change on someone that doesnt want change. ive learned in the past and it was ugly.

Most people are ignorant and listening to your advice reveals theyre weak, no male wants that.

keep on djing!

 

[Dukester]

Originally posted by ScrewIt
hahah yea. but remember dont force change on someone that doesnt want change. ive learned in the past and it was ugly.

Most people are ignorant and listening to your advice reveals theyre weak, no male wants that.

keep on djing!

oh exactly, i know it dude. in fact, just recently i tried to help my friend get over his parents divorce. i talked to him for like an hour to no avail. i've concluded that he is too far gone (and i believe everybody can come back, cuz I recovered from AFC). he is unwillign to change, and that is his problem.

i've given up on him.

 

[xsonik]

thanks guys, your insight has helped me see things in a new light.
-Ron

 

[showtime17]

most of my friends are afc's. it's really bad, when i wanna mack on girls they never help me out. so i usually dont mack in clubs. i can mack alone in the library and stuff, but just my luck i usually end up macking the chicks that are already taken. chicks should wear a sign saying "single" or "taken" so i dont waste time, cause i do have to study as well....

 

[Kelson]

I enjoy hanging out with my DJ and AFC friends, otherwise they wouldn't be my friends. I do, however, prefer hanging out with my DJ friends when being social or partying. It is easier to bounce things off them, to peel off the ****-blocks, and generally a more enjoyable time. Outside of those social settings though, my DJ and AFC friends tend to be equally good to be around.

It is also worth mentioning that there is no reason, and I do this from time to time, why you can't just seperate from your AFC friends at a party and mack a chick up. They shouldn't be interfering much...if anything, I introduce them and ensure the conversation goes well. They're my friends and I know them well enough to direct things where I need at such times [and they don't normally mind].

Kelson

PS)
"Never give this site out to anyone!"

Why not? If you are a real friend, aren't you interested in helping them out anyway? One of the trademarks of a real Don Juan is their very real confidence; I don't worry about my friend rejecting the help or overshadowing me.

In fact, I don't think there is any good reason not to tell them.

If they don't believe it, then they just have to look at me, see those words in action...seeing is believing.

If they don't accept it, then they at least see that the rules work, but may not agree with using them. That's fine, just screws them over in a relationship.

The only other real possibility is that they become better at DJing than me. I don't know about you, but I happen to think I'm quite the guy to hang out with. In fact, I'd love to hang out with myself [do it almost every day], so this isn't really a problem.

 

[Gollum]

Agree with Kelson it can be easier to meet new people when you're out with DJ friends - better social proof. It's also possible for friends to work as antisocial proof: if you're mainly seen hanging around with losers people will assume you're as bad as them, even if with different social groups you're a prince among DJs.

I'm a great believer in the idea that even if you're an uber-DJ who thinks he's the greatest guy alive, there's no need to be an arsehole about it - you should still be able to enjoy talking to AFCs, UGs etc and make them feel at ease. But this has caused trouble for me in the past when I haven't spent enough time with the HBs and alpha males of a group, and landed myself slightly outside their circle.

So basically I'd say when you're joining a new group of friends, gravitate to the DJs as much as possible, but don't get rid of your old mates, they're more important than hooking up or social proof

 

[disciple]

AFC friends can be dangerous if you hang around them too much.

I find that my presence as a DJ usually boosts them somehow but lowers my game somehow.

I prefer to hang with other DJ's because it helps to reinforce my own attitude and way of acting towards women.

 

[7 Virtues]

A friend is a friend to me. The only thing I expect from my friends is loyalty. I'm not going to ditch a friend because he may lower my chances of getting laid.