"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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What Are Your Thoughts On A Reset Button?

VladPatton

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Does such a thing exist? Do you guys have any positive experiences with girls that shot you down the first time out, but then were into you after a certain period of time, either via a no-contact situation and you meet her out of the blue, or sporadic outings within a group of friends?

Not that you should dwell on a girl for a prolonged time after she refuses your attempts to take her out, but is it in your best interest to try again in 3 months, 6 months, a year's time? Does a proverbial RESET button exist?

My gut would answer a big 'no'. Once the two strike rule has been executed you pretty much know your answer. However due to the fickle, moody, and flip-flopping nature of the womanly beast, can it be possible for them to see you in a different light all of a sudden? I thought it would be an interesting question.

Your opinions, gentlemen?

Thanks.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Renegade357

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It depends on how much damage was done the first time around. If you walk when you're supposed to your chances are good. Also you have to man up and continue improving yourself becoming more attractive than you were when you were dating.. Being in my mid-30s it's happened to me probably 4 times.

There are three major problems with this though.

First is the time it takes. In all of my cases it's taken 18 months or more per girl to turn things around. Additionally, in all cases I was no longer attracted to the girl in the same way. I was half-bitter still and knew I didn't need them. And I sure as hell didn't trust them. It was easy to turn them down. Felt good actually.

Second. Usually the girl either remains stagnant during the time or declines in attractiveness. Women generally don't work to improve themselves. They are for the most part.. Lazy.. Why should they work? In other words you won't want them. They get fat, they dated some loser, they had bad taste to begin with.

Third their attractiveness towards me seemed corrupted and selfish. I got a kind of sickly and demented feeling from them. It's hard to explain. Maybe it's just my perception because of the fact that I know they had a chance with me before and blew it. Even if I screwed things up by being AFC I still question how genuine they truly are.

One thing is for sure. I doubt any of the 4 or so women I've experienced this with lose sleep over the fact that we're not together.

It's not pure, it doesn't feel good but it can be done. I still stick to the one shot per woman per lifetime philosophy. Good policy. Too many women out there not to.
 

VladPatton

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Very interesting anecdote, and I agree with you.
 

spiegel549

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Yeah man you really have 1 shot to make your impression and establish yourself as that Alpha male she wants to sleep with over all the over dudes pursuing her.

I recently BOMBED on this broad, really tanked by not making a move. I was so pissed I spent A LOT of time reading the DJ BIBLE and then getting back out there and NOT repeating the same mistake.

I Belive muscleman quoted me once about the "I dont give a **** attitude." It really works bro, any woman you meet and start to take out you need to think if it fails you dont give a ****. You also need to spin multiple plates. You will be able to mentally not care as much when you have more than 1 woman to date.

Id have to go with the old saying sometimes you gotta let her go and see if she comes back to you. Tell her all or nothing. You dont want her as just a friend. Basically she will get over this ex and get with you or she wont. either way start spinning other plates brother!!!!
 
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SgtSplacker

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I have picked up a girl that initially rejected me. I just kept things light, asked her out in a friendly way. She declined, after that I just treated her like a friend. Didn't pay any special attention to her and kept on about my business. I was fortunate in the sense that the circle of friends she hangs with speaks highly of me. So eventually she came around. I'm sure my luck would have been different if her friends didn't know me so well.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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GADavid

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If you find a reset button, let me know. I could use one right now!

Seriously, time and space seems to reset things. IIRC it takes about 2 weeks for people to forget negative interactions. I'm aiming for 3 weeks before going for it again.
 

Renegade357

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SoSuave666 said:
There is something easy about when you "get" with a girl.
Dead truth. I passed up on a chance to get back with an old oneitis girl to date my current girlfriend. My current girl is AWESOME. Infact way better than the old oneitis girl. I do the right things, treat her well and guess what? She makes it easy for me. No regrets, no mixed feelings, no scars, no confusion.
 
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