What are Your Opinions on Getting Married to Single Moms?

[Frank2500]

Greetings to everyone. Well, a very good friend of mine who's almost like an older brother is about to get married to a single Mom. My family wasn't too hot about it but seeing that the love he had for her was so strong, they decided to finally accept it. I've dated at least two single Moms before and while I'm not attempting to generalize, I've noticed that the tendency is for them to want to get the guy hooked into a serious relationship with them as soon as possible, so that he would consider them for marriage. I personally have never felt comfortable with the idea of raising another man's offspring and having the father of the child get involved in my life...situations which quite often have a tendency to lead to conflicts and jealousies particularly in terms of the father of the child when he realizes his ex seems to have found someone she's happy with.


I was just curious as to what are your opinions on the subject of getting married to women who already have children.

 

[Alvafe]

simple put? its stupid.

first you will have to deal with the children as you is the father, normally in his rebelious time will do things just to piss you off. then in the end you can't do anything because hey that piece of sh*it because he is not your child. also I read here from someone sorry don't remember who but he said no way in hell he will have his children in the same degree of importance as someone else child, and I agree.

but hey everyone to his things,

 

[SecondHalf]

Baggage is OK as long as it's yours only or both.

SH

 

[Caravaggio]

She would have to be the start all, end all of women and the kid would have to literally change my life.

Otherwise why would I reward her for irresponsible behavior and put up with the kid's dad?

 

[Flatnose]

Don't do it!

 

[Burroughs]

The fact that men even CONSIDER this shows how profoundly ignorant men are in 2012

 

[BMX]

It is pretty low to be quite honest. Out of the all the men I've met who have gone this route, they were all losers. They lacked self-respect.

 

[Purefilth]

OOH yeah, lets get married to a woman with someone else's kids!:crackup:

Naw, cant be dealing with someone else's leftovers.






Afterthought - Lions in the wild. If a new Alpha takes over a pride (after defeating the last one:box: ), he will kill or drive away the young cubs that the previous one sired.

Obviously this isnt an option for humans, but my point is - even animals dont wanna raise another mans b astard offspring. Marriages would be saved, and childbirth out of wedlock/underage pregnancies would almost disappear.

If only Men could uphold standards. Far too many desperate losers, picking up the desperate single moms - You would have to be to marry somebody elses abandoned woman w'kids. F U C K THAT!!

 

[Mike32ct]

She knows you have no incentive to stay with her and somebody else's kid. So she will try one or both of the following:

1. B$ng you silly so you marry her.

2. Get pregnant.

Plus you would invest a lot of time and money in (somebody else's) kid that will never give two sh&ts about you. Not to sound cruel, but I don't know any people (first-hand) that got really close to a stepdad.

All in all, it's a bad bet, unless she is exceptional.

 

[Purefilth]

*waiting on a huge post by backbreaker -prolly about how alpha he is and how great his woman is and how great he is for raising another man's gay son* :crackup:



No offense bb, I just see it coming.

 

[vatoloco]

What are Your Opinions on Getting Married to Single Moms?

Simple.

You don't.

 

[Bokanovsky]

*waiting on a huge post by backbreaker -prolly about how alpha he is and how great his woman is and how great he is for raising another man's gay son* :crackup:



No offense bb, I just see it coming.

Wait a second...the self-proclaimed hottest looking, most successful alpha male on sosuave is raising another man's child???

 

[backbreaker]

Naw, cant be dealing with someone else's leftovers.

while I dont' believing in shacking up with single mothers, my mother was a single mother and is an attractive woman with a masters degree who has no serious character defects.. she just chose a husband (my father) who can't keep his **** in his pants and she wasn't going to put up with it anymore. I take offense to calling all single mothers "left overs" that's pretty low brow. show some class.


with that above stated, i would never marry a single mother under any circumstances. They have made their bed and even like my mothers situation which was not really her fault, it doesn't make it my fault either at the same time as a single man. It's not my job to correct your life.

ONe of my wife's girlfriends is a 37 year old single mom who is overweight and believe it or not, pulls **** like you woudln't believe. And i mean.. some of these dudes aren't even bad looking.

At the end of the day it's a pathetic site to see first hand. she can't have a social life beucase of the kid, not a real one at least not until he's a little bit older, he will actually be 12 tomorrow. So everything has to revolve around him and her staying at home and the kid is there and you can tell the guy whoever he is that **** gets old.

Even worse, the kid has bad momma issues and still sleeps in the bed with the mom and im' out on that **** WTF is this lol? i can't do this ****. never can go anywhere, never can do grown people ****, kid always trying to compete for attention wtih the dude whoever he is, and even worse, the kid gets to see first hand who slutty his momma is beucase she brings new dudes over the house all the time. it's ****ed up.

The older i get the more respect i have for my mother. She never, seriously tried to date utnil i was just about of school and could take care of my damn self. she sucked it up for over a decade for the most part. there were guys here and there but she NEVER brogue one home and she never was anything other than a lady. I tip my hat to momma for making the best out of a ****ty situation.

Also it depends on the situation with the dad. my wife's friend dad is not in the picture. My mom on the other hand, i have a 12 year old sister and her dad is very much int he picture and keeps him half the week, so half the week besides a phone call from my sister, it's like she has no kids, so she can do whatever the hell she wants to do, then from Sunday-wednesday she plays momma.. then wed night to Saturday night she does her thing. and she dates very much now beucdase of it.

i coudl see someone getting with that situation but not the wife's friend situation

 

[disgustipated]

Hated my stepdad too. But,I find myself in a similar situation. Met a girl, never married but with a son. Banged me first date, plenty of follow up sex....cooking, bjs, bought me ****. We get along great a.nd she follows my lead too. The boy loves.me, attached to my hip. Kinda cute. But entertaining the possibility that I didn't blow her mind, maybe she realizes her situation and is going all out just to have me stay....lots to think about.

 

[Purefilth]

Hated my stepdad too. But,I find myself in a similar situation. Met a girl, never married but with a son. Banged me first date, plenty of follow up sex....cooking, bjs, bought me ****. We get along great a.nd she follows my lead too. The boy loves.me, attached to my hip. Kinda cute. But entertaining the possibility that I didn't blow her mind, maybe she realizes her situation and is going all out just to have me stay....lots to think about.

Well then you are worth working to keep. She knows it, she wouldnt be buying stuff if you weren't. Shed be doing minimum if she thought there was better out there for her.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Hated my stepdad too. But,I find myself in a similar situation. Met a girl, never married but with a son. Banged me first date, plenty of follow up sex....cooking, bjs, bought me ****. We get along great a.nd she follows my lead too. The boy loves.me, attached to my hip. Kinda cute. But entertaining the possibility that I didn't blow her mind, maybe she realizes her situation and is going all out just to have me stay....lots to think about.

There's a reason why she's doing all that. She knows her market value is low, so she has to work extra hard to keep a good man. If she didn't have a kid, she wouldn't be giving you the same royal treatment.

We as men need to realize that growing acceptance of single moms is one of the main reasons for rocketing divorce rates and the accompanying divorce court rape (75% of all divorces are initiated by women).

 

[Burroughs]

Hypergamy is opportunism writ large.

whether its alpha for procreation through the football star
or beta for provision though the established doctor or lawyer
or both happily with brad pitt not likely
or both unhappily with the high school football star current walmart employee...which leads to divorce and a search for a wealthy beta

women only seek those men that have something to give them.

always remember this when a woman shows interest in you. It will give clarity to her behavior and the reason behind it.

 

[Buddha_Mind]

I think labeling all single-moms as failures is some crap. Are all men who failed in marriages losers too? Some had babies and probably didn't expect their relationships to fail.

If I was in those shoes I suppose the circumstances would matter. Did she just get knocked up? Or did she have a real go at starting a family and failed? Did the dude just become a prick?

Just like some women seem to flip switches and change, I imagine some women experience the same with men in their lives.

That being said I too would find it hard to be with a woman, if the father of the kid was constantly coming / going, and I think I would feel kinda weird bonding with the kid maybe? Or maybe not..IDK..

I would say it just depends on the person man. If you met some great woman and she had a kid from something in the past, and it actually was a pleasant situation for you, and she treated you well and loved you and fvcked you good and was on your team, than who cares in some ways? I guess it just depends if the woman is a leech trying to find a daddy for her kid and someone to foot the bill (There are women like that too).

My uncle married a woman with two kids who had been in an abusive past relationship. He doesn't pretend to be their father and interacts more as a friend. I dont' think they expect him to be a father. Granted they were like 15/17 when he married her. Eitherway all he does is talk about how great she treats him and how much fun they have. I don't think he had wanted to marry her actually, my mother (his brother) talked him into it (he had been married once before and it failed) -- but he remarried and they honestly have always seemed to get along.

Granted I don't know their personal **** beyond that.

I would just say its a depend-upon situation, aka, how old the kid is, circumstance from the child, woman's take and stated roles she expects of you, financial circumstance...

If I was in a different place in life and met someone killer but had some 12 year old and she / he was cool and they didn't want me to be some foster-dad MAYBE I wouldn't be closed to the idea--but then again I've never been totally stoked on any desire for my own biological offspring anyways...for some men (who are stoked on having kids of their own Being, no adoption) they would probably never agree.

But success / failure of the relationship probably has more to do with the two individuals involved..

(you could marry some woman w/o a baby and still end separated and now what if some future woman re-considers dating you because 'eww he's got kids he's a a fvcktard') -- and that wouldn't be a fair statement I don't think, do you?

 

[MatureDJ]

The fact that men even CONSIDER this shows how profoundly ignorant men are in 2012

I don't think it's ignorance so much as desperation. When a bachelor only sees available women as childless whales and decent looking single mommies, he asks himself a question:

Do I want to:

1) Go for the fat pig, but have my own children

2) Go for the single mommy, but submit to the personal disgrace of raising a cuckold child after the fact?

3} Continue to express my sexuality via internet porn, etc.

After being fed up with #3, such a single mommy chasing man figures that it's better to at least have a good looking woman to bang, as #1 would make him sick.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Shoot. One of the most co-operative females I've had was a single mother. Single moms have baggage though. Their kid is the baggage. She had to bring extra co-operation because of this baggage.

If you want an insta-family go ahead and do the damn thing. Me personally I wouldn't do it. I have 0 kids and I feel like I have potential. I want the same thing in a girl. A girl with 0 kids. I don't want to tell one of my kids why them and their sibling have two different fathers.

I did this girl so wrong though. All my people say I did her wrong and I know I did her wrong but o well. I broke up with her to get with my current girlfriend. I even brought her to my apartment and started dogging her saying I'm in love with another girl. (Immature I know)

But all in all me and her were together for a few months and I can honestly say she never did anything to upset me. Not one thing. Very good girl, just bad sorroundings.