"Blank Mind on Dates? She's Dropping Hints You Keep Missing"

The plates get cleared and the silence lands like a brick. You can feel her waiting. Your brain offers up your commute, your job, the weather — topics that have ended more second dates than bad breath.

Here's what most guys never learn: women hand out free conversational material all night long. Tiny clues about what they actually want to discuss. Catch them and you never run out of things to say — because she's telling you what to say next.

Rule 4 of the "22 Rules" trains your ear to catch every single one.

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what are the top 10 convo topics?

Kourt

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When ur talking with a girl you're interested in, or on a date with, or whatnot, what are the 10 best converstation topics to bring up when u run into a lull? T
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Walk this Way

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10. HER Favorite Movies/Plays/Books/Films
9. HER Favorite Hobbies/Activities
8. HER Favorite Music (more powerful emotional attachment to music for most women)
7. HER view on life and religion
6. HER Friends
5. Where SHE dreams of going one day
4. HER childhood memories and recollections
3. All the wonderful things you could do for HER
2. Sex and HER body
1. Love, HER dreams of what SHE idealizes love to be
 

Eternal

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Moved to Discussion Forum.
 

RawkinKaoticStyle

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see how he capitalized HER

so basically talk about her.
 

drixsa

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Originally posted by Walk this Way
10. HER Favorite Movies/Plays/Books/Films
9. HER Favorite Hobbies/Activities
8. HER Favorite Music (more powerful emotional attachment to music for most women)
7. HER view on life and religion
6. HER Friends
5. Where SHE dreams of going one day
4. HER childhood memories and recollections
3. All the wonderful things you could do for HER
2. Sex and HER body
1. Love, HER dreams of what SHE idealizes love to be
wow sounds like a really boring date...or therapy.

dates that go like that are not mistakes that i make twice.

first off unless you are going out with some very deep, smart, life-experieced girls you would be lucky to get half of these answers and by the way not too many guys could answer most of these either.

both parties should be sharing information about themselves what they think, jokes, etc.

most dates go differently. to try and plan what topics will be discuessed is silly and will never go as planned.

before we start giving advice make sure we can back it up, ok?;)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Kineti[C]harm

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Originally posted by Kourt
When ur talking with a girl you're interested in, or on a date with, or whatnot, what are the 10 best converstation topics to bring up when u run into a lull? T
Whatever makes the conversation float and that puts both of you into a comfortable and enjoying personal state... If one of your subpoints of the date is sex or if you are going to or is at one of your places, sexual undertone is a good thing.
 

Walk this Way

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Originally posted by drixsa
wow sounds like a really boring date...or therapy.

dates that go like that are not mistakes that i make twice.

first off unless you are going out with some very deep, smart, life-experieced girls you would be lucky to get half of these answers and by the way not too many guys could answer most of these either.

both parties should be sharing information about themselves what they think, jokes, etc.

most dates go differently. to try and plan what topics will be discuessed is silly and will never go as planned.

before we start giving advice make sure we can back it up, ok?;)
Have you ever been in a relationship longer than a year? If you're still just joking around with surface topics then, something is seriously wrong. Your date idea sounds more like the "lull" you might experience on a first date. A few months into a relationship, by forcing her to think and triggering emotional responses and connections in her mind, you force her to invest in you, it's a way of bringing two people closer together. And by then, you should be able to naturally and fluidly lead into these topics with no planning necessary.
 

drixsa

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Originally posted by Walk this Way
Have you ever been in a relationship longer than a year? If you're still just joking around with surface topics then, something is seriously wrong. Your date idea sounds more like the "lull" you might experience on a first date. A few months into a relationship, by forcing her to think and triggering emotional responses and connections in her mind, you force her to invest in you, it's a way of bringing two people closer together. And by then, you should be able to naturally and fluidly lead into these topics with no planning necessary.
longer than a year? No, but in terms of getting a girl i fail to see where it makes a difference.

if a "lull" is connecting with the girl, not just listening to her talk for an hour plus then i will take it.

on my good dates i connect with the girl, we BOTH talk, share, joke, etc. I will NOT sit there for however long and listen to her go on about her dreams i am NOT interested YET.

i don't force my girlfriend or anyone else to trigger emotional responses by planning all this BS out or play evil doctor (at least not conciously ;D)

this takes all the fun out a meeting a new person.

So are you saying that a girl invests in me b/c she talks non stop to me? And i am supposed to make it seem like we are having a conversation when really i am just trying to get her to talk at me? BORING!

i realize these may be some tough questions for ya but id like your response.
 

Walk this Way

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Let me illustrate.

Warm summer day in Central Park last year, beautiful day actually, and it's dusk and everything feels incredibly romantic - we all know the feeling. And my girlfriend and I were walking hand in hand for almost 30 minutes in total silence - there was no awkwardness, it felt great, but after a while I could tell she was dying to talk to me. So I simply said, "Wouldn't it be awesome to visit Costa Rica one day?"

Now, notice there was nothing DJ about this - it was more an AFC comment than anything else, but it was the perfect topic, and it had a level of lightness and yet it was almost serious. And it worked.

Her eyes grew wide, her face brightened, she smiled, and she said, "oh my god that would be sooooooooo coool" And she described to me in the cutest, most seemingly insignificant details what she would love to do in Costa Rica - the beaches, the exotic fruits, the rainforest walks etc.. And I really got a kick out of her being so excited and happy, and I kept suggesting little bits that included me, and she happily included them into her little dream she was describing. And her happiness was incredibly genuine.

Here is a PERFECT example of my question 5. Let's analyze this:

1) She's feeling happy, and she's around YOU describing and she feels special about describing something SHE likes

2) She's making a POSITIVE neurological connection: the pleasure in Costa Rica with the pleasure of YOU.

3) We find out what SHE wants to do with YOU, she's basically telling you everything that would make her happy.

This is perfect because you're making her emotionally excited, you're enjoying the little dream (it's not passive "therapy" as you describe) and you're making tremendous progress in terms of understanding what she truly wants.

So I'm not saying you should sit there at a dinner table and do an interview. I'm saying that the topics I listed are some of the best ways to truly reach a woman's heart in an almost innocent way. That's pretty much it.
 

drixsa

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Originally posted by Walk this Way
So I'm not saying you should sit there at a dinner table and do an interview. I'm saying that the topics I listed are some of the best ways to truly reach a woman's heart in an almost innocent way. That's pretty much it.
i wish you would of just said that to begin with:)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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