What about the special ones?

[DonJuanit0]

What about when you meet a woman, you accomplish to date her, get in a LTR with her etc and you find out that THIS woman is actually very different than the others in your eyes and mind?

What I mean is, I got myself in a relationship before 4-5 days with a girl I already knew from the past but never chatted enough or anything! These days we've been together I am acting like a retard! We get together out and I find myself staring in her eyes and smiling for no reason! I get so f*cking calm when I look at her like she hypnotizes me! I am like all over her all the time and even though I know this ain't right i keep doing it! I am trying to stop and everytime I understand that I am passing the lines I stop and get back in my chair! We haven't f*cked yet but I haven't even tried to (dunno why)!

Though she seems to like my behavior and how "fool" I look when I am with her, I feel strange! It's been a long time since I've felt this and I don't know where I am heading to! I'm afraid of ruining the whole thing cause of being like that in front of her, but in the same time it comes out so naturally when we are together!

What I am asking here is that when you get these kind of feelings for a girl how can you make yourself look like you are cool? I don't want her to understand that I am so much in to her but I can't help it! It screams out!!

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

Bro I've been there. It's a terrible pain to have those feelings with someone and then have them turn on you because you're acting like an AFC. Took me months to get this one girl off my mind, and it's only happened one other time.

I wish I had advice for how to deal with it. Then again, where exactly is the problem? Isn't she digging you? Just say to yourself... if this was a girl Iwas only slightly interested in, how often would I call her? Limit yourself to that if she's the flighty type.

 

[DonJuanit0]

Yeah the problem is that I ain't controlling myself here! I know how to act to any other random chick I meet and want to f*ck or w/e I want, but I'm incappable of doing what you correctly said most of the time we are together! LIMIT MYSELF!! I only limit myself when I understand that I've been staring at her for 3 mins and smiling like a nerd!! :/

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

Yeah I felt totally helpless when it was going on, and the only way I mastered it was to find and focus on flaws that made her more human to me. Trust me, they're there and if you don't know about them yet then you need to recognize your feelings as infatuation and NOT LOVE.

The second time it happened to me, I knew that it was infatuation. The first time, I had no idea that it was so superficial because of how strongly I felt.

If you don't know why she isn't perfect, then you don't really know her. If you don't really know her, then your feelings are more a reflection of your own desire to impregnate and be with something more perfect than human.

 

[iqqi]

Enjoy it.

Just don't let anyone disrespect or take advantage of you. Don't cross any lines, don't become needy, don't become cloying.

I'd advise to pick up a new hobby right about now, or put more time into a current one, to balance out all the time you want to spend with her. It will give you something else to focus on.

There is nothing wrong with feeling infatuation and joy when making a connection with someone special. It is only bad if your self esteem is too low to recover when and if it does not work out.

I think it is more of a tragedy when people try to get rid of those feelings of joy and excitement, when meeting someone special. To never "feel" intensely, again.

And make sure that you are feeling those emotions for a good reason. Like, not just because she is hot, or she is manipulating you with "female game". Is she kind? Funny? Really into you as well? Stuff like that should be what reinforces your wonderful feelings.

 

[DonJuanit0]

I do know her and I do know that she ain't perfect! She gets immature some times and others can influence her a lot on everything! Maybe some more that seems nothin right now! Although, I think you're right, it's infatuation, I'll keep saying that to myself when we go out again and hope everything will be better!

 

[horaholic]

Just remember, that the 'love' feeling is a chemical reaction in your brain. You are literally DRUGGED right now, so try to maintain some clear thinking in any decisions you make regarding the two of you. And like any drug, you need to keep it in moderation, and dont abuse it!

 

[drak_ool]

how old are you? how old is she?

how many serious, long-term relationships have you been in before?

 

[xdreamz]

whenever i got like that and started acting all afc, i was acting very wierd...like i would try to talk my way into getting more attention from her and all this really just repulsed her and she started acting more to my disliking...i kind of made a mental note of that so we were walking through the park with my friend i just had a kind of switch in my head that turned on and said '**** it all i'm just going to try to have a good time' then i started acting cool like enjoying myself where I was, smiling, laughing a little more, i guess it was to kind of show off that i was fine like i was indifferent to all her b.s....in the end she went from being repulsed to attracted.

ur actions say a lot about you, every little thing...people can read into it and even though you can have something truly justifyable and reasonable to offer or receive the psychology of the other person may find it repulsive or annoying basically undesirable. it's not you, it is...but it isn't at the same time so you don't have to take it personal. the job is to just be human and show your humanity (which sometimes does itself on a subconscious level) in a way that is suitable.

 

[DonJuanit0]

how old are you? how old is she?

how many serious, long-term relationships have you been in before?

I'm 20 and she's 18! I've had many relationships till now but 2 of them were serious (over 1 year together)! I never was faithfull to any of them tbh. It's not my first time being infatuated, but it's the first time finding myself acting like a "fool" cause of it! Cause since I've been in this site I've learned what is right, what is wrong, and what can ruin the whole thing, which is what I'm afraid of...

 

[Energizer]

You just gotta keep your emotions in check.

Showing emotion is a strength, not a weakness, but overdoing it is a weakness and it comes across as a symptom of being emotional unstable, clingy, needy and soppy. None of these are good traits and will turn a woman off after awhile. I should know, I went down this route four years ago and was burned hardcore.