"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What a strange girl

Byezbozhniy

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A few weeks ago I met a girl. We spoke online for a bit and then went on a date. Here's what happened:

We met, she told me I'd had my hair cut too short and she didn't like. When I bought a drink she nicked my change. I didn't respond. We were stood, chatting, waiting to go into the cinema and she just wandered off, so I sat down. 5 minutes later, she came back. She got my change out of her pocket and started throwing it at me for me to catch. 20p fell on the floor and she told me to pick it up. I refused. She refused to move until I picked up the 20p, so I went into the cinema by myself. 10 minutes later she came in but wouldn't talk to me ... so naturally I kissed her. Throughout the film was just the general **** ... holding hands, affection etc. After the film we went for a wander. I pulled her up to kiss her again ... nothing. We had a bit of a chat at the end where she wanted me to 'psycho analyse' (I hate that word) her and the date, so I gave her some of my generic psychological / philosophical bollocks talk, which seemed to interest and impress her (cos she's a woman, and a bit younger than me - I'm 24, she's 17).

She is pretty, very well spoken, intelligent, interesting and very funny, and I did like the playfulness of these games (they weren't malicious or *****y or really arrogant and there was an humourous understanding of what these games were), but the competitive part of me is thinking I'm gonna make her feel like a **** for doing this and just ditch her.

How would YOU deal with this situation?

I'm very tempted to NEXT her, just out of principle, but she is QI and this is the most interesting first date I've ever had ... especially since we did something as dull as watching a film.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Dabrant29

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Man Looks Get Old really fast in situations like that. You will either go balled or throw your head into a wall with how frustrated you will get with her immaturity
 

Byezbozhniy

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Would it be really immoral to F-close this before getting rid? It's not like she's a virgin or anything. :D
 

sidewind3r

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she sounds a little nuts and maybe like a waste of your time
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Byezbozhniy

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sidewind3r said:
she sounds a little nuts and maybe like a waste of your time
Don't you get bored of the same old girls tho? I find it's always interesting to try something different. Her behaviour was actually quite DJ-ish throughout the night and it was kinda interesting to battle her push-pull. It was quite fun picking up on all her techniques and then acting the complete opposite of how she expected me to react too.

Hmmm.
 

sidewind3r

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I see your point. If you like that personality then continue seeing her. At least it will give you experience on how to deal with this type of woman.

Personally, it feels like she's testing you every half step of the way but I guess you handled it right because she kept coming back.
 
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