"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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went to park today and did two approaches

cablecow15

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I went out at the park trying to meet ppl , Im new to this town and i know absolutely nobody except my family, so I was walking around and saw a few girls laying on the grass reading books ,three of them , 2 hb7,s and a hb4 fattie in between them , I sit on a bench and try to think of something to say , and eventually I decide to go up and ask them what people do around this town for fun . it went like this

Me: hey you all live around here ?
hb4: "softly" yeah
Me so what do you guys do for fun around here ?
hb7#1:uhhh, pretty much just this (all of them kinda laugh)
Me ahh that's what i was afraid of ,i see your studying , you guys go to college around here?
hb7#2: yeah ____ college
Me:cool i heard it was a good one , you like it ?
(they all liked it )
then I asked them their majors , the cuties were pharmacy and therapy and the hb4 was gonna be a teacher so i made a joke about two of them going in to profitable fields
after that it was kinda awkward ,alot of silence, it was almost like they were talking to themselves until i left so I told them it was nice talking to them and said bye , think i heard one giggle as i left idk if it had anything to do with me or not , i didn't bother asking for the number because they were so boring that i didn't really want it.


The next group of girls i approached i saw walk past me while i was contemplating approaching the first, also three girls, i walked up to then and started out the same way , there were two hb6's one might have been a 6.5 and one hb7

Me: hey you all live around here ?
hb7(kinda stammers) umm yeah kinda why ?
Me: i moved here not to long ago and i was wondering what ppl do around here for fun ?
hb7 lists various things they do like malls bowling n other crap
Me o really? well i moved here from Florida so its kind of a culture shock
hb7: o yeah me too
Me : o really what part?

it went on for a while , alot better than the first , but i found out these girls were in high school , to young for me.

so all in all nothing came from any of it , but i feel 100X better that i actually talked to some girls , rather than just sit on the sidelines
i also think i missed a few opportunities to make the conversation more about her , but i was so nervous going into it i completely forgot my plan
 
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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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cablecow15

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Thanks man , it has been way to long since Ive done any approaches , I would have tryd more today ,but most of the cute women were pushing strollers lol
 

Deicide

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cablecow15 said:
Thanks man , it has been way to long since Ive done any approaches , I would have tryd more today ,but most of the cute women were pushing strollers lol
Haha, that's the same way here too! Good job approaching. A lot of times we have to make ourselves approach just to do it. Cookeville should be a big enough city to do cold approaches pretty anonymously. Where I'm from, I know most of the people at the park. lol If you keep approaching regularly, it becomes much more naturally.
 

cablecow15

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im going to try and make sure i don't leave that place anymore until i talk to at least one girl , Ive wasted to much time not doing stuff like this , what makes it worse is before i moved here i lived in Florida , in Orlando , I wasted a lot of opportunities there =/
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Masculinity

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Great job approaching. I bet that after you approach & things go well you ask yourself "wtf was i scared of and why was I nervous of the approach?"


I walk around with this mindset and it has really helped me:

"No approach is a failure. You fail automatically and reject yourself by not approaching. Do you want a hottie that treats you well? She isn't going to come to you out of magical reasons. YOU must create those reasons and the 1st interaction!" Try it out sometime. It does wonders!
 

macallik

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good stuff, keep approaching man
 

HappyHarryHardon

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i dont think the "hey you all live around here" line is a good way to start. sounds creepy lol.
 

cablecow15

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HappyHarryHardon said:
i dont think the "hey you all live around here" line is a good way to start. sounds creepy lol.
lol yeah i may just leave that out next time and just ask them what they do for fun , its not like people would come from all over to go to a park lol
 

Blusher

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Congrats for approaching.

One thing will help: drop a couple of things about YOU.

Self-disclosure brings self-disclosure. It will get you past the "stranger" point and avoid awkward moments.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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