"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Well, i need some help here

crazyman11

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But not the normal kind of help that you guys would give. The first paragraph is gonna be about this girl i met on a cruise, and the second one is what the problem is. Feel free to skip the first paragraph if you want.

Alright, well after dinner on the cruise, i took a flower from my table. I thought it would be a good way to pick up a girl. I had the flower for about 2 hours(Yes, i'm picky) until i saw HB9, i don't think i could have done any better than her. So i meet her in a club, give her the flower and we talk for about 5 minutes(the club was horrible for talking to people). After that, i did the robot(like from the chapelle show) and everyone wanted to talk to me, so i went out and walked around with my new amigos for a while, and they were damned funny. We ended up in the buffet at the cruise, and then i see HB9 again, with her 2 friends, a girl and a guy. I wasn't interested in the other girl and the guy was cool, he wasn't really trying to make any moves on the girls. So we talk from about 1:00 a.m to about 4:00. The next day, i did my normal stuff and then it was back to the club(I went there almost every night on the cruise) and then i saw her. I approached, and asked her why she wasn't dancing, she said she was waiting for me, but unfortunately i can't dance. I asked her to teach me, but she said no :( . Anyways, after the club closed, we went around with about 15 people and we were going to pull an all nighter. It was about 2 in the morning and everyone was going to try and stay up until 8, when the cruise was over. So eventually it is 5 in the morning, and it's me the girl, my cousin and the other guy i met the night before. We're trying to stay up, but eventually HB9 goes to bed, and i give her a hug. I feel like i should have asked for a good night kiss. The cruise was coming to an end, and every 5 minutes(is that bad?) i would check the buffet for her, to ask her for a kiss goodbye because we live about 7 hours away from each other, and we're probably never going to see each other again, besides on myspace.

Now, for the problem. I know i'm never going to see her again, and i feel bad that i didn't get to get my kiss goodbye. I couldn't be any more proud of myself with her, because it's a step up from what i usually do. I don't feel like doing anything, besides thinking about her, and i feel kind of sad. I need some words to cheer me up. So help me out you guys
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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penkitten

Master Don Juan
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what can i say man... what's done is done.
next time you find yourself in a situation like that, you can do things differently.

no sense in crying over spilled milk.
 

crazyman11

Don Juan
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Thanks for the help, but you know what really helps out? Just going outside, to the mall. It helped me realize that HB9 wasn't the only good looking girl out there. I just realized that i should move on, like penkitten said. She isn't totally off my mind, but at least i know that there are a lot more fish in the sea. Thanks for the help
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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