hello !
I`m new on this forum and I`m posting about a problem I have encountered recently.
I`m 29 and my GF is 25 , we are together for 3 years and we sort of gotten to the talking about marriage. This was so slow since i have a lone mother I`m sort of taking care of.. so me and my GF still don`t leave together, we were about to change that , get a place of our own when the following event occurred.
She lives with her sister and for a couple of days some male friend came into town and they offered him lodging. after the friend was gone back to his place.. she came and told me that he made some sexual propositions to her and she accepted , nothing to heavy she pretends "just kissing and petting" on the spot I was inclined to forgive her even though she didn`t agree to may request to cut of all connections to the said male friend, so I did forgive her.. we even had make-up sex.
Afterwards knowing that she continues to chat with him i sort of sneak out and read their conversation, both leading to the events and the conversations after he went back to his place, they were pretty heavy in sexual, but i did sort of gotten the impression that she was telling the truth only kissing and petting although some foreplay was involved. She did kept telling him that it was over the adventure and she wanted to stay with me. So without telling her I knew the content I confronted her again and asked for the full story without the sugar coating.
She agreed and told me that since I`m her first serious relation she kinda regrets not having more previous experience and with other males and she just conducted an experiment to see how it is without thinking to much about consequences.
She even agreed to let me read the messages I`ve already read. We talked a lot and we concluded that our relation is stronger than this and she just ..sort of went and had herself the equivalent of a "prostitute" in terms of emotional involvement with the guy. The thing that bothers me the most is that even when i asked her again to stop communicating with the man ..she refused.
I figure I should stay true and not show jealousy, and try to prove myself worthy, both by impressing her and not falling into a work - sleep routine and by taking some time for myself.
What is your assessment of the whole situation and any advice about how to proceed.
Thank you and sorry for the long post. Also sorry for the poor language, English is not my native language.
I`m new on this forum and I`m posting about a problem I have encountered recently.
I`m 29 and my GF is 25 , we are together for 3 years and we sort of gotten to the talking about marriage. This was so slow since i have a lone mother I`m sort of taking care of.. so me and my GF still don`t leave together, we were about to change that , get a place of our own when the following event occurred.
She lives with her sister and for a couple of days some male friend came into town and they offered him lodging. after the friend was gone back to his place.. she came and told me that he made some sexual propositions to her and she accepted , nothing to heavy she pretends "just kissing and petting" on the spot I was inclined to forgive her even though she didn`t agree to may request to cut of all connections to the said male friend, so I did forgive her.. we even had make-up sex.
Afterwards knowing that she continues to chat with him i sort of sneak out and read their conversation, both leading to the events and the conversations after he went back to his place, they were pretty heavy in sexual, but i did sort of gotten the impression that she was telling the truth only kissing and petting although some foreplay was involved. She did kept telling him that it was over the adventure and she wanted to stay with me. So without telling her I knew the content I confronted her again and asked for the full story without the sugar coating.
She agreed and told me that since I`m her first serious relation she kinda regrets not having more previous experience and with other males and she just conducted an experiment to see how it is without thinking to much about consequences.
She even agreed to let me read the messages I`ve already read. We talked a lot and we concluded that our relation is stronger than this and she just ..sort of went and had herself the equivalent of a "prostitute" in terms of emotional involvement with the guy. The thing that bothers me the most is that even when i asked her again to stop communicating with the man ..she refused.
I figure I should stay true and not show jealousy, and try to prove myself worthy, both by impressing her and not falling into a work - sleep routine and by taking some time for myself.
What is your assessment of the whole situation and any advice about how to proceed.
Thank you and sorry for the long post. Also sorry for the poor language, English is not my native language.