You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
One of them is not like the others....
Here, Here... Was a time when both Booker T Washington and WEB Dubois spear headed such initiatives. From the late 60s-forward no one aside from perhaps The Nation Of Islam has been doing this sort of highly necessary work
Exactly. The dude in the front right is not wearing a tie...
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
There is nothing wrong with "helping" other people's kids (male or female). That's not to be confused with raising another man's offspring instead of having your own kids. The latter is beta as fvck.
just a step farther. running an orphanage is ok. but taking one of them home is not? i get it. just looking as where is the line.
Hi Bokanovsky,