We broke-up

[Cinamon]

My boyfriend dumped me about 10 days ago and yesterday he said he wants to get back together. The reason he gave when breaking up with me was:
1. I werent spending as much time with him as i use to (and this is kind of true, but only because he was less available and I didnt want to be the person that always worked around him)
2. he felt like the spark had gone for me, and I just werent interested in him anymore
3. I was moving on with my life (Recently been offered a new job that I was considering accpeting and also got new accreditations)
4. I had other commitments and he was a distraction for me, etc.

To finish off, he said that our relationship was over and that we could still be friends.

I really like this guy, and so I asked to give me a chanc to rectify things and he just went quiet on me so i left him to think about it. I never heard from him again for a few days, so I said I understood what his answer was, and that it was over, and I said I didnt want to be his friend and it was best if we had a clear break.

So, yesterday he drops me a stupid text saying he acted out of frustration and that he wanted to clear the air. I said it was a good idea for us to meet to clear the air, and that he really did hurt me alot, especially seeing as this came out of the blue, didnt even see it coming. We are going to be meeting up tomorrow to talk about this, but I feel really hurt and betrayed. He just worried himself in to a state and then called things off. I really like him, and I saw us having a future together, but his behaviour has changed a lot over the past couple of weeks, and I see the relationship as extremely unstable at the moment. If there were issues, he made no effort what so ever to try to rectify these and went straight in to dumping me. I cant be with a person like that.

Obviously this is my interpretation of the events, but i would appreciate some advice.

 

[Miles28]

My advice:

1. Learn when to use "weren't" and when to use "wasn't".
2. Don't ever post in this forum again.
3. Please never spawn children.

 

[chance]

isn't there forums like this for girls out there? i feel uneasy with girls lurking around here.

 

[jophil28]

Please remove yourself from the dating pool. You are not qualified to be in an adult relationship.

 

[Warrior74]

Tell him I said to spin more plates. Sounds like he went AFC and then lashed out. As you are probably AFC as well as having a lower sexual market value than him, you're still on the fence about him. Sorry ya got dumped kiddo. Nobody likes to get dumped. As I would tell a guy...NEXT.

If there were issues, he made no effort what so ever to try to rectify these and went straight in to dumping me.. I cant be with a person like that.

can anyone spot what's wrong with this sentence? LOLOLOLOLOL

 

[Tesl]

Some extremely harsh replies here, I don't get what the problem is? Her post isn't THAT unreasonable.

Or am I missing some history on this board from this poster or something?

isn't there forums like this for girls out there? i feel uneasy with girls lurking around here.

If you feel uneasy with girls being around then how do you ever expect to get comfortable building relationships / picking them up / etc?

I just don't get this forum sometimes.

To the OP, I'd cut things off. Once a couple split up once its rarely worth retrying, just move on to better things.

 

[Tiguere]

Cinamon been on this forum for a while now. She isn't someone who just appear out of nowhere. Stop the b!tchhness.

 

[squirrels]

I cant be with a person like that.

Then why waste a lot of effort on "second chances" and "trying to fix things"?

It might be healthy for you to talk to him and find out why he dumped you, just for your own knowledge. Very possible he found another woman. Also very possible he just got bored...maybe or maybe not your fault. Maybe you're just incompatible. I wouldn't beat yourself up over it.

I, too, am confused as to why you would choose THIS forum to ask for advice, though.

 

[cordoncordon]

To me this seems like a case of a guy who needs you under his control, and when he saw you having your own life outside of him, he got very insecure. Not a good sign and I think you need to sit down and ask yourself what it is you exactly like about this giy....and if this is a man that could make you happy for an extended period. This almost seems like a case of you wanting something just because you can't have him. When he wants you, you seem to pull away. When he doesn't want you, you seem to gravitate towards him. Deep down I don't think you really are that attracted to the guy. If he is acting this way now, what is going to happen the further into the relationship that you two get? I remember you having issues with this guy a few months ago...major issues. And now he's acting like a little kid who if he doesn't get his way takes his ball and goes home?

I've seen your pic, you are an attractive women. You could do much better than this man. Good luck!

And btw to the people on this forum...ease up on her guys, this girl is alright. And some of you wonder why you have trouble with women lol? Act like a gentleman and you might have better luck.

 

[Serg897]

Hah - I don't understand why some guys on this forum have to be @ssholes when a woman posts here. So she wants some perspective from qualified, enlightened DJs - who can blame her?

Cinamon, its obvious that this guy is having a rough time dealing with his emotions after breaking up with you. Dumping you then performing a 180 and saying he wants to go back is a sure sign of someone being driven solely by his emotional desires, and lacking of true sense of knowing what he wants. He is acting like a child.

I would predict that getting back with him would only lead to more drama as you struggle with this. Im not sure this relationship is stable in the long run. Like I would tell any guy on here, seriously re-evaluate what you want from this man and think about NEXTing.

 

[Kailex]

I think someone misplaced the address for LoveShack.

Was this the guy you were hiding the self-made porns from or the guy that had them?

 

[todays_news]

My boyfriend dumped me about 10 days ago and yesterday he said he wants to get back together.

Dont get back with somebody that dumps you, in the interests of self respect.

The reason he gave when breaking up with me was:
1. I werent spending as much time with him as i use to (and this is kind of true, but only because he was less available and I didnt want to be the person that always worked around him)

2. he felt like the spark had gone for me, and I just werent interested in him anymore
3. I was moving on with my life (Recently been offered a new job that I was considering accpeting and also got new accreditations)
4. I had other commitments and he was a distraction for me, etc.

Your boyfriend is a *****, and did all this to get your attention because he is insecure and weak.

To finish off, he said that our relationship was over and that we could still be friends.

Another reason he is a *****.

I really like this guy, and so I asked to give me a chance to rectify things...

You shouldnt have said that, you should have shrugged and said 'okay, well its your loss.'

and he just went quiet on me so i left him to think about it.

He went quiet to make you think and stress about it, and evidently it has worked wonders.

I never heard from him again for a few days, so I said I understood what his answer was, and that it was over, and I said I didnt want to be his friend and it was best if we had a clear break.

You should have said nothing, and gone out with your girls and had a good time meeting new guys.

So, yesterday he drops me a stupid text saying he acted out of frustration and that he wanted to clear the air.

You are your his girlfriend not an emotional tampon, further evidence he is a *****.

I said it was a good idea for us to meet to clear the air, and that he really did hurt me alot, especially seeing as this came out of the blue, didnt even see it coming.

You should have said nothing, and moved on, that would have made you feel better quicker and plus you've given the frame to him by admitting he upset you.

We are going to be meeting up tomorrow to talk about this, but I feel really hurt and betrayed.

So why are you going? You shouldn't. Because even if you do get back together, nothing will be the same again.

He just worried himself in to a state and then called things off.

*****.

I really like him, and I saw us having a future together, but his behaviour has changed a lot over the past couple of weeks, and I see the relationship as extremely unstable at the moment.

Is it really worth the hassle? Its going to end anyway, better you hold your ground and retain dignity rather than running back when he realises his error.

If there were issues, he made no effort what so ever to try to rectify these and went straight in to dumping me. I cant be with a person like that.

Sounds like he had the right idea. And your beginning to develop it aswell.

Obviously this is my interpretation of the events, but i would appreciate some advice.

all together now sosuave......


NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEXT.





And to remove all further doubt, read this:

http://roissy.wordpress.com/the-sixteen-commandments-of-poon/

and your decision ( I hope) will become clearer.

And finally, cordoncordon says your attractive.

How attractive, can i get photos? Nice one, I'll expect a pm. Nothing to filthy though, I am a gentleman.

 

[cordoncordon]

And finally, cordoncordon says your attractive.

How attractive, can i get photos? Nice one, I'll expect a pm. Nothing to filthy though, I am a gentleman.

She is attractive no doubt. If i lived in England...I'd hit it. No offense Cinamon.

 

[Joe Stud]

She IS hot, and from what I see, has the mindset of a guy. I think the "other" guy is intimidated. He sounds like he's a bit needy. Straighten his a$$ out Cinamon. Personally, I love hot women who also have a life of their own... and not always whining about needing more attention. Tough decision.

 

[Cinamon]

Thanks for the advice guys. I think Todays news is right, things wont be the same again even if we did get back together.

For the guys who wonder why I am posting here: I believe in Karma, what goes round will come round, and generally like to bounce idea's of from the forum here, cause it gives me an idea as to how my other half or date is likely to respond then.

Ultimately most of us women are *****es, and the advice we give one another isnt necesarily in the other persons best interest, so i prefer seeking advice/guidance here, from guys, and like wise am happy to give my opinion if someone wants a womans advice.

Thanks for the compliments Cordon and Joe, but I would say I am average looking, but make up for it with my personality and thirst for adventure!

 

[Bible_Belt]

Ultimately most of us women are *****es

 

[Warrior74]

Some straight up captain save a hoes up in here. Harsher responses are given to men on this forum every day. She's been here long enough to know the score and can do with out any white knighting from you lot.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Some straight up captain save a hoes up in here. Harsher responses are given to men on this forum every day. She's been here long enough to know the score and can do with out any white knighting from you lot.

Yes, most definitely this. ^^^^

 

[cordoncordon]

Some straight up captain save a hoes up in here. Harsher responses are given to men on this forum every day. She's been here long enough to know the score and can do with out any white knighting from you lot.

You're over analyzing.

 

[todays_news]

Some straight up captain save a hoes up in here. Harsher responses are given to men on this forum every day. She's been here long enough to know the score and can do with out any white knighting from you lot.

And what would be the advantage of a harsh response, over general advice?

More to the point, what is the point of your post brah?

Even more acutely to the point, why did you feel the need to even post if thats your view?

Some straight up women haters in here, its so pitiful and sad to see...