Watched my buddy just run through the AFC cycle, poor guy

[AW1983]

So a friend of mine, he's pretty much the first guy I met when I moved out to the area I'm in and I met a lot of my current local friends as a result of that. Super cool dude, laid back, and we had some mutual passions, etc.

Anyway, this guy semi-disappeared off the grid a couple months back and then I heard he had a gf. Then he started posting stuff on FB about "I think I found one of the good ones" etc. When I saw that I thought to myself, "uh oh this guy's headed toward disaster". Then I go to a party where they are both at and this guy's on Cloud #9, never seen him smiling so much. When I saw this I thought "disaster imminent".

Btw, this girl is a HB5 at best in my opinion. I wouldn't tap it if she fell in my lap honestly, and I when I saw her my first thought was that he could do better (aesthetically that is, I thought maybe she has the heart of a saint or something and that balances it out for him). My buddy's been single for a long, long time and does not practice plate theory or anything like it.

So a few days ago we chatted on FB and he tells me he might break up with her and she's been making things rough on him. I told him to follow his gut and to always judge a woman based on her actions, not her words. I also told him to withdraw attention and see how she reacts.

To his credit he broke things off with her. Anyway here's a couple of his excerpts from our chat today:

My brain has been working overtime thinking about all the bull**** I put myself through with her.

Everytime I really wanna give myself to someone I stop listening to intuition

i know were not right for eachother obviously
cause if she was right for me she wouldve made me feel it
all she ever gave me was a pain in my chest and constant wonder
i did a lot of nice things for her too
we both let it go for too long I guess

As you can see from the above, the AFC is strong in this one. Since he hit me up a few days ago I've slowly been dispensing some subtle red pill truths to him. Just thought I'd share this as a reminder. I can tell this guy is pretty beat up about it, and I feel bad for him. Stay vigilant guys, don't invest your soul into the first girl that gives you some attention.

 

[Thatfeel21]

How is/was he an AFC. A lot of people have been with a woman that they know they should dump. Even after knowing that and even after breaking up, its still hard on both parties. Sounds like he's mourning a bit, thats completely natural.

 

[AW1983]

How is/was he an AFC.

Well he's on the right path now, by dumping a low quality woman. However his actions through the course of the relationship were quite afc-esque. The defense presents exhibits A-D:

A. Posting AFC sh!t on facebook about how he found a good one, etc, blah blah. That's what SHE should've been posting about HIM, not vice-versa.

B. "wanna give myself to someone" - this sounds like a chick. I mean we all feel that to some extent, but he let it dominate his actions and therein lies the problem.

C. "all she ever gave me was a pain in my chest and constant wonder" - did not qualify her initially and now suffering this much...after 2-3 months?

D. "i did a lot of nice things for her" - self explanatory.


EDIT: To be fair I commended the guy for breaking it off and told him it would only get worse down the line. I'm not judging him, he's a super cool guy. But he doesn't know basic game, and this is what happens...

 

[backbreaker]

this is somewhat off topic but i have a minute to kill and it kinda hits home to the guy trying to settle down with a very avg girl. my old best friend subscribed to that theory. he would attract some head turners but would date long term some very very avg looking girls because they were faithful and were appreciative of what they had, etc.

i don't think that flys anymore or at least it doesn't work

I mean, not discounting just pure plates who never got past plate status, but girls i actually settled down with, I can honestly say that I had an easier time with the more attractive ones. There are 3 girls i dated who I would not call ugly, i would call cute but there was something about them, their personality, their like interests, how they "got me, that made me want to give them a legit chance and all 3 of them ended roughly. one of them relapsed, one just turned out to be a low self esteem depressed bat **** crazy girl, and one basically tried to cheat on me because she was sure i was cheating on her when i was not. i would give all three solid 6's. not ugly by any means but i have done better but i was into them for various reasons.

when a ugly girl or a girl who is below your standards or a girl who thinks you are seriously above her standards, it will not work for the same reason that you cannot keep a girl that you know is above your standards. you will knowingly or unknowingly sabotage the relationship. Heather basically relapsed because i would not answer the phone one day, one of her friends got into her head and told her that she knew i was cheating on her and that she knew she should not have agreed to date me anyway guys like me always cheat, lol i was having tooth surgery. so i get out of sugury the next day after the drugs wear off i call her and she has relasped and tells me she knows i'm cheating on her i'm like girl i was doped out on vicidan after having my mouth rearranged lol.

but you get a girl who you think is on your level and she thinks she is on your level, and she gets to the dating stage, there is a confidence that okay, this what i can get. I am what he can get. he's not going to chea ton me because he knows what he has. and not only that most attractive girls have dated enough guys to know a good one when they see one and know how to act in a relationship. they know how to at least pretend to be good GF's because they have played GF their entire teenage and adult lives.

like crystal she had been fat and ugly her entire life utnil she lost weight and got glasses and grew tits and i was like her 3rd boyfriend ever and the only oine that had at that time ever lasted over 2 months and the first week or so itr was fine and after that it was all downhill

 

[st_99]

Well he's on the right path now, by dumping a low quality woman. However his actions through the course of the relationship were quite afc-esque. The defense presents exhibits A-D:

A. Posting AFC sh!t on facebook about how he found a good one, etc, blah blah. That's what SHE should've been posting about HIM, not vice-versa.

B. "wanna give myself to someone" - this sounds like a chick. I mean we all feel that to some extent, but he let it dominate his actions and therein lies the problem.

C. "all she ever gave me was a pain in my chest and constant wonder" - did not qualify her initially and now suffering this much...after 2-3 months?

D. "i did a lot of nice things for her" - self explanatory.


EDIT: To be fair I commended the guy for breaking it off and told him it would only get worse down the line. I'm not judging him, he's a super cool guy. But he doesn't know basic game, and this is what happens...

wow, that is some high level afc sh!t!

 

[5string]

Tell him to join this forum and start reading.

 

[Thatfeel21]

Oh ok, well after reading your reasons, makes sense!

 

[Greasy Pig]

The red pill is a bitter one but every man has to just fvcken swallow hard and realise things will get better.

 

[SecondHalf]

Good post, hits too close to home.
I feel like I'm starting from the beginning again.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but assuming you can get her, you keep her by basically never making her feel like the queen.

You can say I love you (eventually), you can be a gentleman, but never say anything to inflate their ego (especially publicly).

Is that about it?

I'm familiar with The Sixteen Commandments Of Poon and agree with them for the initial.

What I would like someone to spell out, is say the 10 commandments to maintain a relationship and never turn into a pu55y.

I just know one of you guys can do it?

Thanks in advance,

SH

 

[Zarky]

I'd be curious to hear exactly what the problems with their relationship were...