Was this a diss? Or just bad timing?

[ultra dj]

I made plans on Tuesday to hook up with a chick on the weekend. At that point she said she was pretty open for any day. I knew when i called her to figure something out on Wednesday, that I would be busy on Thursday and Friday, so I figured Saturday would be cool.

I called her up and we chatted for a bit. She said that on Saturday she was actually going out with some friends, but she wasn't sure exactly if she was going to go. She did however sound like she was still interested in hooking up. I wasn't going to tell her to diss off her friends, so I basically told her to get back to me on Saturday, and let me know for sure as that was my only free day.

I was out pretty much all day on Saturday, and getting around 10:00pm, she still hadn't called. Obviously i didn't wait around for her, and i made other plans.

Now...in this situation, do i consider it a diss? Do i call her up on Sunday and see how her weekend was, or wait for her to call me?

This is a chick who gave out all the buying signals and seemed to have a fairly high IL...

 

[MVPlaya]

You've been on this site for two years and you've posted 28 times?

 

[Befuddled]

Originally posted by MVPlaya
You've been on this site for two years and you've posted 28 times?

yeah, what a dork (sarcasm) lol.

diss ? proabaly not. if ou arent very familar with this girl yet...this is probably expected. if i were you id wait for her call. if that dosent happen call her sometime duringthe week.....dont try making plans, just talk about the past weekend. dont expect anything, and dont ask her out again unless she moves the conversaton in that direction.

 

[Tkman]

Originally posted by ultra dj
I wasn't going to tell her to diss off her friends, so I basically told her to get back to me on Saturday, and let me know for sure as that was my only free day.

1) Should have acted less careless and said "oh well, your going to be missing alot, peace out" ... she would have probably said "what ???" ... or called you back [if she was interested].

2) Never tell her you are free all day. It sounds boring and less mysterious

3) Always look at the situation from a 3rd person point of view. You asked her out and said no because she was going out with her friends and they had no plan !!! Is she was really interested, she would have went out with you.

Originally posted by ultra dj
Do i call her up on Sunday and see how her weekend was

Please read the Dj Bible

 

[JJMcLure]

1) First date should be on a weekday, you need to seem like you have a lot going on, you won't spend a weekend night on her until she's earned it.

That sh1t about her being able to call you ON Saturday to meet up Sat night suggests to her you have no friends to hang with and no other chick options. That's BAD. Even if you don't see it that way (and went out with your buds), she will have.

2) Don't "chat" on the phone, use it to set up a date and talk on the date. She chats on the phone with her girlfriends, you are not her girlfriend.

3) Chicks don't call - you have to call them (in the early stages at least).

 

[ultra dj]

The convo was pretty much ONLY about the hook-up. It was about 3 min. in length. We already made "tentative" plans to hook up on the weekend...this is how it went after some fluff talk:

Me - well, i'm pretty busy on thursday and friday...but we should hook up on saturday. There's this new place that opened up i wanna check out called "x"

her - oh, i totally want to go there! What time do you want to go?

Me - probably later around 9 or 10..

her - ...Only thing is i might be going to a movie on Saturday.

me- oh really, which one?

her - i dont know, we haven't decided yet...but i'm just going with some friends of mine...i'm not 100% sure if i'm going though.

me - hmmm...well i've got plans on Thursday and Friday...

her - oh really? well i'm not sure if i'm going yet...

me - alright...well...call me on Saturday and let me know what's going on, and if not, then we can figure something else out.

her - yeah for sure...

That was pretty muich it...she didn't call, which wasn't a big deal...but like it was said before, if she had a decent IL, she would have called, no?

 

[JJMcLure]

Originally posted by ultra dj
she didn't call, which wasn't a big deal...but like it was said before, if she had a decent IL, she would have called, no?

She said she wasn't even sure if she was going to the movies. If she had a HIGH IL she would have dropped those plans (it was with friends not a date), let alone taken your offer over what was still an uncertainty.

Could be she was going to keep you as backup plan in case she had nothing else to do.

But in future maintain control of the situation. You call her, you get a definate yes or no - or you say something like "maybe we will do this another time, when you're schedule is less full" and don't promise to call back. Leave no uncertainty.

If she doesn't want to hang with you, there are plenty of other chicks who will at the first chance. (Important to know, but also an important belief to project).