Wants to be just friends. What should I say?

[casanova_goat]

I've known this chick for almost two months. We have seen each other sporadically (she is at school). We had sex a few weeks ago (last time I saw her) and she usually texts me everyday.

She just said she wants to be just friends. To which I responded: "I'm not saying I want a relationship but I honestly have no interest in being just friends, either." Then she said: "Ok. I'd feel more comfortable if we were friends rather than what we are now." (she previously said she didn't want a relationship, so i don't know why we are now). To that, I just said "ok" and she said "Ok so you're cool with it?"

I haven't responded. My plan is to respond then just ignore her and see if she misses me. I wouldn't mind being her friend with benefits. If not, then let it go.

How would you guys play this? My friends advise me to just say "ok" again.

 

[foreverAFC]

tell her its cool, but never talk to her again

 

[casanova_goat]

Thanks. Do you guys honestly think there is any hope of keeping her around as a friend with benefits?

 

[dustmuffin]

Thanks. Do you guys honestly think there is any hope of keeping her around as a friend with benefits?

MAybe but you probably texted to much. You ought to spend your time gaming women that want sex from you and or interested in you in a non friendly way. Search the board for how to get out of the friend zone. It's a lot of effort with little success. Don't be her friend and move on.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

Just tell her a simple "ok", then dissapear.

It's that simple. If she sends you text after that, you can ignore or you can answer straight forward without returning any type of question reply. She'll get the hint sooner then later.

The thing is you don't want to be her friend because you really don't want to be her friend/orbiter. Not to make her regain attraction. Find your inner DJ bro.

 

[fastlife]

Just wouldn't respond. Hit her up in a couple weeks to "hang out."

Any response'll be in her frame. Either she buys into your frame or you're wasting your time.

 

[zinc4]

When she says friends, you just don't reply. So you already lost her little power game.... in her eyes, at least.

 

[casanova_goat]

The problem I have with just saying "ok" or "ok cool" is it is a lame way to end things with a girl I've been dating/talking to for as long as I have with this one. And also it's like I'm saying I'm cool with being friends, which I am not. If this is the last thing I say to her before going aloof, I would rather it be "
honestly if we’re not gonna hang out like we used to, i rather not talk" but that is too harsh.

I sense she will miss talking to me (maybe I am wrong) if I completely disappear. As hopeless as this situation is, I'd like to keep her around in some capacity. Just not as a sexless friend.

 

[casanova_goat]

MAybe but you probably texted to much. You ought to spend your time gaming women that want sex from you and or interested in you in a non friendly way. Search the board for how to get out of the friend zone. It's a lot of effort with little success. Don't be her friend and move on.

It was hard to create an illusion of mystery since she texted me all the time. What's strange is this "I want to be just friends" nonsense comes on the heels of the longest time she and I hadn't spoken since we've known each other.

 

[dustmuffin]

It was hard to create an illusion of mystery since she texted me all the time. What's strange is this "I want to be just friends" nonsense comes on the heels of the longest time she and I hadn't spoken since we've known each other.

Don't know what to tell you besides sometimes you will never know why a woman did something and its best not to worry and use emotional assets pondering why. Accept it and move on. Next woman don't text as much even if she initiates. Ignore sometimes. Try to use texting only for logistics of setting up dates. Don't be so available.

 

[wifehunter]

But, the friendzone is so much fun! /verbal irony

 

[kenpiffyjr]

The key ingredient of frame is to never be butt hurt.

Guys who just don't reply (if it's because u want a stupid edge) or send a reply like "I'm not satisfied with friends so I'd rather just not talk" is a sign to a woman of being...you guessed it, BUTT HURT.

If she wants to say lets just be friends, who cares what she thinks if you agree with a simple ok. Just don't be her friend and she'll go away.

 

[casanova_goat]

Believe me I have no intention of staying in the friendzone.

When she said:

"I'd feel more comfortable if we were friends rather than what we are now."

she was basically saying, friends just without the sex, nuzzling, hand holding this time around?

 

[casanova_goat]

The key ingredient of frame is to never be butt hurt.

Guys who just don't reply (if it's because u want a stupid edge) or send a reply like "I'm not satisfied with friends so I'd rather just not talk" is a sign to a woman of being...you guessed it, BUTT HURT.

If she wants to say lets just be friends, who cares what she thinks if you agree with a simple ok. Just don't be her friend and she'll go away.

Well, I said "ok" before. I just never responded to her "So you're cool with it" message. You say I should, with another "ok"?

Candidly, I don't see how it will matter if i just thereafter ignore her messages. Wouldn't see then think I'm butt hurt.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

In that question, I would just say "I see no problems with that".

It's your actions after that that mean everything. If you don't want to be her friend, then just don't. This is so simple.

 

[casanova_goat]

I said "ok cool" ... going into ignore mode.

 

[GeniuzKhrist]

Pretty well done to this point. Don't fall in to her traps that she will set up now, such as asking to hang as just friends and then acting upset when you don't or don't respond at all. Absence increases your attractivness and makes her wonder. Make sure you stay busy pursuing things that yo want and other women. You're too busy from now on to have a extra friend to entertain. Unless she wants what you want

 

[casanova_goat]

I don't know what to do here.

I said "it's cool" and she responded with this "Ok. Are you mad because you wanted to have sex with me?"

She sees through my "it's cool" --- I honestly don't know what if she is insinuating would you like to be **** buddies moving forward.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

She WANTS you to lose your frame. She's insecure and needs your validation at this point. She doesn't see through crap.

You have two options. Go get busy real quick and forget about this stupid text conversation. Or reply that "you aren't mad, just kinda tied up with something right now" and GO get busy!

 

[casanova_goat]

I kinda get the impression she is suggesting a no strings attached type thing. She just was getting fed up with all the lovey dovey **** and thus friendzoned me.