"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Want women to approach YOU and give you IOI's? Here you go...

Masculinity

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While preparing for my exam in a psychology class, I have been reading a few hundred pages in my text books. In my social psych class, we are discussing many topics--one of them is social proof.

So what is it?

Social proof: also known as informational social influence, is a psychological phenomenon that occurs in ambiguous social situations when people are unable to determine the appropriate mode of behavior.

Some of you may be familiar with the term and how it applies to women. However, let me provide you with an example:
John and Mark went to a night club last week. They had plans to go with their attractive female friends Jessica, Nicole, Maria, and Yaz. It turns out Jessica and Maria couldn't attend because they had the flu. Nicole was out of town and Yaz had to work. Because it was Mark's birthday, John felt obliged to celebrate his best friend's birthday with him, so he went to the club with him. Their experience wasn't very pleasant because they are both shy meeting girls and dancing, as most of the time, they only dance with their girl-friends who weren't there that night.

A month later, it was John's birthday. The girls wanted to make it up to them after hearing the bad news from Mark's birthday at the club about six weeks before. The six of them, were all looking good (the girls were three hb8's & one hb9). On the dance floor, the guys were dancing each with two of the girls at the beginning of the night, yet towards the middle of the night, the guys noticed a high number of women giving them attention, IOI's and approaching THEM. How can this be? They thought looking at each other and smiling. And although excited, Mark & John couldn't understand what was going on and just called it a "lucky night" in which they both danced with a few new, attractive girls each.

This is what we refer to as social proof. A psychological term referring to how people imitate the behavior of others when faced with uncertainty in a situation. Social proof is the most powerful when those people we are modeling are similar to us in race, age, lifestyle, etc.

Still not convinced? Consider the plethora of data a sociologist at University of California, San Diego found: When the media publishes a suicide story either at the front of the newspapers or as the main interest in TV, radio, etc, the suicide rate after the news increases up to 400% in the area--including plane, auto, and other kinds of disguised "accidents"--where it occurred before going back to normal about two weeks later. Ever notice how one plane crashes, and then other "accidents" happen? How shootings in schools have happened not too long after one another? How people start clapping after other people start giving a round of applause?

Well, now you do know. Consider that if social proof can literally drive people to kill themselves. What can a few of your attractive female friends do for you? They can create the image that you are a cool, outgoing guy, who is attractive causing you to have women want you. This idea also explains why
you get women flirting with you or giving you IOI's when you're with your girlfriend who is attractive. They think "hmm...she's more pretty than I am, and if she's with him, then he must have something really good going for him." Yet, when you are walking by yourself, women ignore you.

What are YOU doing to improve the way people perceive you?

PS: The views above are all based on psychological studies of human behavior with multiple, consistent results done by researchers in the field.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Huffman

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This also applies inside your social circle: if a girl likes you, she will tell her friends and suddenly they are interested in you as well.
 

zekko

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Robyn923b said:
The six of them, were all looking good (the girls were three hb8's & one hb9). On the dance floor, the guys were dancing each with two of the girls at the beginning of the night
The only problem I have with this is that if two guys can get three HB8s and one HB9s to themselves as friends, they shouldn't be having that much trouble getting other girls. In other words, most guys who are struggling with women will probably not have the luxury of having a couple of HB8s to take out dancing.

I've always wondered if this social proof thing works on guys too. For example, if a new girl comes to town, and all the guys are talking about her and saying how hot she is, would that make you more interested in her? Because it would make her seem more high value, wouldn't it? If taking her out would make you look like a bigger man in front of your friends, would that have any influence on your attraction to her?
 

ArcBound

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zekko said:
The only problem I have with this is that if two guys can get three HB8s and one HB9s to themselves as friends, they shouldn't be having that much trouble getting other girls. In other words, most guys who are struggling with women will probably not have the luxury of having a couple of HB8s to take out dancing.

I've always wondered if this social proof thing works on guys too. For example, if a new girl comes to town, and all the guys are talking about her and saying how hot she is, would that make you more interested in her? Because it would make her seem more high value, wouldn't it? If taking her out would make you look like a bigger man in front of your friends, would that have any influence on your attraction to her?
Well, you ever notice that one girl (who is not even always hot) who is surrounded by dudes that all just hang out with her in hopes of some poontang pie?

To be honest I think subconsciously or on some level the social proof thing works on guys as well. The main difference is that as we are growing up guys are bombarded with stuff like "bro code" and basically principles of honor as to not go for a girl a good friend has called "dibs" on.
 

sstype

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I'm calling the effectiveness of social proof into question. My observations are that women at bars/clubs are too wrapped up in their own group to really care or judge someone else based on how many other women they are with.

If you guys ever actually go to bars and clubs, you'll realize there's just way too much chaos going on and no one really has the time or attention span to judge your worth based on how many women are in your group. Yeah, I could see it working in the sense that it makes women more comfortable with you because you look safer and shows you have the social skills to handle women, but I don't see it as some kind of magic bullet which makes or breaks whether you get laid or not.

You can easily establish comfort and rapport without "social proof" if you know what you're doing.....you don't need to rely on others to achieve this.
Zekko is right....the social proof itself is just a manifestation of your ability to positively influence others to associate with you. If you're successful at winning strangers over, then that must imply you already have plenty of friends/acquaintances in the first place.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Masculinity

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Huffman said:
This also applies inside your social circle: if a girl likes you, she will tell her friends and suddenly they are interested in you as well.
This is very true ^


zekko said:
The only problem I have with this is that if two guys can get three HB8s and one HB9s to themselves as friends, they shouldn't be having that much trouble getting other girls. In other words, most guys who are struggling with women will probably not have the luxury of having a couple of HB8s to take out dancing.

I've always wondered if this social proof thing works on guys too. For example, if a new girl comes to town, and all the guys are talking about her and saying how hot she is, would that make you more interested in her? Because it would make her seem more high value, wouldn't it? If taking her out would make you look like a bigger man in front of your friends, would that have any influence on your attraction to her?
Getting women to friendzone you isn't a luxury; the luxury is to friendzone them yourself and tell them how much of a "good friend" they are to you. If you do this, she will most likely develop at least curiosity for you. In bigger cases, she may even rationalize her attraction to you based on this.

Demand increases interest and price. Therefore, if men want a certain girl, suddenly many other men want her too--just like everyone wants the newest iPhone, because everyone else wants it. Taking out a top-notch woman will have massive influence on the reactions & interest you generate on other women. It sounds shallow, but women their value in their looks and reputation and they know we love curves. However, a girl with curves who is a slvt has not value.

You made some interesting points. And definitely social proof isn't the answer to all issues, but it us definitely a very useful tool in your box.
 
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