"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Want to date but no ride

Bumguy

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Going to university and met this great girl in one of my classes. School is only a 10 minute bike ride from my house so I see no need for a car right now. I'm quite sure she's interested and I would like to ask her out for the next weekend but I got no ride besides the bike haha. Any ideas for a first date that I don't have to pick her up or anything? Think it's much of a turnoff for me to not have a car? I mean it's fast, free and keeps me healthy eh so I think it's great. This girl is awesome though and I'm very interested. Any advice appreciated
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ApocalypseCow2

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Do any of your friends/parents have a car you can borrow? What's in walking distance from her place? Is there a metro/subway system?
 

BobbyJ

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I had that same problem last year (I finally got a car). A couple things that I did was to find a guy friend with a car and do a double date type thing. Or you could just ride over to her place and then hang out at her apartment. Or find a bike for her and go on a bike ride together. Since you're at a university, there's usually school events that you can go to together.

It might be kind of lame to do stuff that's only walking distance, but if you can get her to like you and want to spend time with you, it's not going to matter a whole lot on what you guys do.

BobbyJ
 

DJHoolahoop

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If you're of age, then try thinking about renting a car. Some places rent out cars pretty cheap and if you're not old enough, ask your mom or dad to rent the car and sign you into the insurance policy.

If that doesn't work, use the bus. Ask her to meet you at a given place. That way it keeps your personal life and home life private and lets her know you're not a taxi cab. Plus, if she's going to university. She's got to be getting there somehow, if she lives there. Then ask to hang out around there then.

If you need ideas, think playing frizbee or doing something outdoors at the university. Or try and find on-campus restaurants or cafe's. Some have bars or billiards too, that usually gaurantees a GREAT time PLUS you can usually get some Kino action by "showing her how to hit the ball" if she sucks at it lol.
 

Abbott

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Just say you'll meet her somewhere, and don't worry about giving her a ride.

I've got a pickup truck, nothing glamorous about that. So I too am interested in not giving rides (besides doing so makes you someone's b|tch, which I have no time for).


Ben
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Bumguy

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Thanks guys for the advice. Yeah there's a coffee shop close to the univ. and some small cafe's on campus so I'll try that. One more thing...if I'm inviting her to meet for a drink or something, how can I do some kino if we're just sitting and talking?
 

gungho

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kino is just about the art of touching. Touching is very powerful and can evoke a form of connection. It can range from simple touching of the hair, to quick touch of the hand, to something more drawn out and obvious. If your at a coffee shop, you can neg hit or compliment her on her hair then touch it whatever. Grab her hands briefly in a moment of of emphasing a point, or just be be more obvious and caress her hand or leg lightly.
 

Abbott

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Originally posted by gungho
kino is just about the art of touching. Touching is very powerful and can evoke a form of connection. It can range from simple touching of the hair, to quick touch of the hand, to something more drawn out and obvious. If your at a coffee shop, you can neg hit or compliment her on her hair then touch it whatever. Grab her hands briefly in a moment of of emphasing a point, or just be be more obvious and caress her hand or leg lightly.
That sounds interesting and all, but perhaps you meant to post this reply to a different thread?

I fail to see how this reply is relevant to this topic.

Ben
 

Bumguy

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Originally posted by Abbott
That sounds interesting and all, but perhaps you meant to post this reply to a different thread?

I fail to see how this reply is relevant to this topic.

Ben
I specifically asked a question about kino. He's simply replying..
 

qweretyuiopas

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Yeah I dont have a car either but for me its worse cause I cant borrow one either cause i dont know how to drive
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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