"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Walking on eggshells.

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I know you shouldn't try to kiss everone's ass and try to please them. At what point does doing what you want and say simply make you look like an @sshole?

I draw the line at personal insults but the people around me still view me this way simply because I say what everyone else is scared to.

(NO, not on the forum... you keyboard jockies)

Damn, I'm confused.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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duttylove

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you will always have hateration when you succed its part of the game. say and do what you want just dont insult people. if some one gets mad at you because you have said something that they dont agree with. then f**k them. let them hate. its common sense weather or not your expressiong your own views or insulting some one.
 

THE_ADDMAN

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you become an ******* when everything you say has to be ****y and funny or just plain ****y. be nice and social often to avoid this

(read: "hey, hows it goin today? :)"
with genuine interest)
 
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I am not trying to be ****y.

Do you realize the time and effort required to plan out what you say? I say what goes on through my head (as long as its not weird, crazy or insulting)

Maybe its the people I've been hanging out with. They're a little stiff and uptight about certain things.

I'm nice to people as long as they deserve it or seem like they need it(having a bad day)
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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THE_ADDMAN said:
you become an ******* when everything you say has to be ****y and funny or just plain ****y. be nice and social often to avoid this

(read: "hey, hows it goin today? :)"
with genuine interest)
I can't find the artcle, the words used are too common according to search engine.
 

Mr. Anderson

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It's funny because I've lately been trying to find the answer to this dilemma myself. As a recovering AFC I must confess that I've always tried to please and befriend people in the past. I wasn't a flatterer or an ass kisser, but I went with the flow most of the time and didn't speak my own opinions often enough. There is also an opposite extreme to that: being blatantly rude and annoying; so, where does one draw the line? It really depends on who you're talking to and the message you're trying to get across. Sometimes it's better to really listen and analyze the person you're communicating with before saying something that may incriminate you and make them hate you. Remember that you can't please everyone all the time and you will naturally have your disagreements with others, but the point is to be respected and not hated.

Hope that helps.
 

THE_ADDMAN

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sorry, when I say "read:... "

I'm just simplifying what I said before that.


if I quote another thread, I'll put up a link
 
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