Walking Away / Calling her bluff

[StoneyRU]

My question is- a girl that you have to do this with, is she LTR material? I feel like if a chick isn't 100% interested from the start it'll never work long term.

Wish I would've seen this thread 4 months ago. I still got laid a bunch but I definitely took the wrong route in a very similar situation.

Live and learn

 

[adam225]

That how it is though - We get screwed over by some b!tch; search the internet for answer, and magically find this forum (which is a SERIOUS life changer). Now we are ARMED

 

[Uncharted]

I feel like if a chick isn't 100% interested from the start it'll never work long term.

Not true. Almost zero women will have 100% interest from the start.

 

[StoneyRU]

So I must not be the only one on this board to go beta for a oneitis and end up getting the sh!t end of the stick?

Glad I found this forum for sure.

My problem- I've slept with a lot of girls but I am very picky. So the girls I'm not interested in, especially in college, I could easily ignore them and be a polite ****. They always came running back and wanting more. But the few I actually get attracted to/infatuated with I put in too much effort and end up hurting myself.

Definitely a lot to learn still but this forum has opened my eyes to a lot.

 

[adam225]

So I must not be the only one on this board to go beta for a oneitis and end up getting the sh!t end of the stick?

Glad I found this forum for sure.

My problem- I've slept with a lot of girls but I am very picky. So the girls I'm not interested in, especially in college, I could easily ignore them and be a polite ****. They always came running back and wanting more. But the few I actually get attracted to/infatuated with I put in too much effort and end up hurting myself.

Definitely a lot to learn still but this forum has opened my eyes to a lot.

Just study the bible man and hang around. It won't be long before you start to pickup how things really are....

 

[StoneyRU]

Agreed.

My issue now is that I get kinda down on myself for messing up my most recent girl by showing too much early. Im at the point where I get angry at her and myself almost daily.

She's really hot which is the core of my issue, but when I truely look back we weren't very compatible. From day 1 it was all my effort to do anything. She's younger also, 22, so I feel like no matter what I did she wasn't ready for anything and even if it would've led to something more it most likely wouldn't of lasted.

Idk I'm just trying to snap out of this anger at myself for messing this up and move on. Definitely helps to know others here have been In the same situation and moved on to find better girls/better relationships.

 

[Uncharted]

I was in the same spot. Here's what helped me:

-Date other girls. At first you might even compare them to your oneitis, but it will pass.

-Spin multiple plates (meaning date more than 1 girl at a time). Girls are flaky and it's easier to have them chasing you with high interest than you chasing them when they have low interest.

-Do other things. Go out with your friends. Get a hobby. Learn a skill. At one point you will see that women are not at the center of your life.