Walk away or stay and play?

[kintsugi]

Hey - after some advice...

I live in a small community and met an eastern european girl of 36 the weekend before last at a mutual friends house/meal. Got on well, thought she had a fit body and was interesting.

Invited her to my place this weekend for a party. Flirted alot and probably both drank a bit more than normal. She gave me quite a few negs/sh!t tests but from reading here and on the RMale I assumed amused mastery.

Showed her the bedroom early in the evening on a 'house tour' and lay down together, went for the kiss and she was into it.

Later at the end of the night, she wanted to stay and her friends were trying to set us up so left her. She didn't put up much fuss.

I kicked the last guests out and went to bed with her. Good sex and she instigated but realised we had both drunk a little more than usual so checked a couple of times that she was cool but she wanted to press on and she has a great body. Told her she was a little fat when she asked if I liked her body - she loved that.

She ran off in the morning with a hangover.

Texted her on Monday to see if she was ok but in a sort of c0cky way. Got an instant reply with some questions - ignored them.

Texted her this morning telling her she would be fine by the weekend and if she was free on Saturday we should go for a drink. She ignored me all day but this is a very small community and bumped into her on the way home from work.

She didn't seem that into me. Quick chat and then she mentioned Saturday and how ashamed she was. She's catholic so I guess that's some of it. Anyway, she mentioned but didn't give any commitment to my date idea but just said she didn't want to drink.

I gave her an out by saying we could go for a non alcoholic drink in the afternoon but that it was up to her to decide if she wanted that and let me know.

She's leaving this place and heading back to EEurope in 2 months.

I'm looking for some fun and have no illusions about LTR but am not sure whether to pursue within this limited time frame for more fun or just walk away. I will still see her through mutual friends whatever the outcome.

Any advice (apart from write less).

(Thanks to the SS forum / RMale blog etc I don't think I have c0cked up too badly so far - in the past I doubt I would have got her in to bed, so thanks for a good resource/information/guidance)

 

[Suspens]

Told her she was a little fat when she asked if I liked her body - she loved that.

That was rude, how did she respond?

 

[kintsugi]

She laughed, pouted, and realised that I was teasing her - she's not fat at all - incredible body for a woman her age.

 

[Suspens]

She laughed, pouted, and realised that I was teasing her - she's not fat at all - incredible body for a woman her age.

Ah, ok. Sorry I thought she was really fat.

 

[kintsugi]

Basically I'm trying to play by newly learned rules and want to make sure I keep on track.

 

[sodbuster]

You've already worried too much about it. Just see what happens, You know she's leaving, so it isn't going to be a long term deal. IF you hook up again or not.... it's just sex, no big deal wither way.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Kintsugi,
An almost classical seduction and follow up...You don't need advice,you are a Master...Sodbuster is right about it not being a big deal...but you might like to follow through with a Holiday in her Country...Where is she from?...Rumania?...Could be very educational...So much History!

 

[kintsugi]

I guess I am after advice on how to get past all the guilt/shame she is feeling and get back to easy going fun. Haven't had that response before.

I told her when I saw her that it was nothing to be ashamed of but I guess I have been hanging around with slightly younger girls who haven't seen sex as a big deal (25+ yr olds). I think at 36 maybe she is feeling guilt that it's just meaningless sex & isn't going to lead to BF/marriage.

Anyway, meeting her on Saturday morning so will keep it light and fun with no expectations.

I have a trip planned to Hungary to see mutal friends...(should have said CEurope not EEurope).

 

[latinnova]

Sodbuster has it right!

 

[LiveFreeX]

I think at 36 maybe she is feeling guilt that it's just meaningless sex & isn't going to lead to BF/marriage.

Run away screaming.

 

[Die Hard]

Waiting 24 hours before replying to her text, was too much. I'm not saying that's the explicit reason why she is now holding off but I'm just sayin'... If a woman texts you in the morning and you wanna make her wait, then just respond later in the evening, as if you had a busy day and didn't find the time until late at night. This is believable, right?

But when you wait unti the next day, it's too fvcking obvious that you're doing it on purpose. Each living person has time to respond to a text when he goes to bed at night, everyone knows this. So if you didn't even do it at that point, then you obviously didn't respond ON PURPOSE, it's clear to her. Besides, women love getting texts when they go to bed .

As for how to proceed, it might help if you show something more to her than just sexual interest. When you see her and talk to her, make some fun and jokes with her and wait for a moment where you're both laughing.
Then when the laughing fades away, look her straight in the eyes and say "Hey..." then stay silent and just keep looking in her eyes.

She will look back at your eyes with curiosity and perhaps say "What?". Then you lower your voice a little and respond: "I think I like you...". You will probably see her eyes light up but then you quickly raise your voice again and totally change the subject, like "Anyway, did you hear about that popular tv program blah blah blah?! It was crazy, right?!".

So after that little moment where you showed her some of your feelings, you just act like it never happened. If all goes well, this will make her chase after you

 

[kintsugi]

Should have listened!
Run away screaming is the right response - in hindsight.

As I mentioned, I texted her a time and place for a morning meeting - she again didn't commit but texted back saying was I free any other time.

I replied that I was free in the evening and would love to make her a meal. Now she has two options or she can say 'no but I am free at xx:xx'

Her reply was indignant - 'A$$hole, all you are interested in is sex...' etc etc.

I checked with some male friends and they all thin my approach was sound and she over-reacted. Guess she has had some bad experiences in the past or she is still in guilt mode and never really wanted to meet up but was looking at a way to transfer that bad energy back to me as blame?

Either way, I'm out! Red flag.

Back to working on becoming a better man, and learning about game/manosphere. Thanks for your responses and thanks for taking the time to read this mess!

 

[Yewki]

Waiting 24 hours before replying to her text, was too much. I'm not saying that's the explicit reason why she is now holding off but I'm just sayin'... If a woman texts you in the morning and you wanna make her wait, then just respond later in the evening, as if you had a busy day and didn't find the time until late at night. This is believable, right?

But when you wait unti the next day, it's too fvcking obvious that you're doing it on purpose:

I agree and if I were to guess this is why her attitude changed towards the OP. She texted OP questions on Monday, he didn't respond until Tuesday, and he apparently ignored them. A bit harsh after having banged her, and with this girl it was probably too much of a slap to the face. OP tried too hard to be aloof and it backfired with this girl IMO.

Her reply was indignant - 'A$$hole, all you are interested in is sex...' etc etc.

Well that escalated quickly

 

[kintsugi]

Update - it's a small community here and obviously I keep bumping into her.

First few weeks she made a point of looking through me - I found it amusing to be honest - very childish behaviour.

Now she smiles and nods to me.

Bumped into her this week - she was directly ahead of me in a queue and had to wait for her order. I just smiled when she turned round and carried on talking to my mate.

All fine now - but a good lesson in stormy/crazy women. Have lost her number & will not contact her, so good exercise in going 'ghost' for me too. Good to learn from any experience.

 

[sodbuster]

Yeah, but when a woman you've banged texts you, reply..... let her know you are at least marginally interested in her... the one day wait is only for women you haven't done....

you don't need to go all puppy dog the next day, just let her know you liked it

 

[Zunder]

I guess I am after advice on how to get past all the guilt/shame she is feeling and get back to easy going fun. Haven't had that response before.

I told her when I saw her that it was nothing to be ashamed of but I guess I have been hanging around with slightly younger girls who haven't seen sex as a big deal (25+ yr olds). I think at 36 maybe she is feeling guilt that it's just meaningless sex & isn't going to lead to BF/marriage.

Anyway, meeting her on Saturday morning so will keep it light and fun with no expectations.

I have a trip planned to Hungary to see mutal friends...(should have said CEurope not EEurope).

Advice on what? You fvcked a slut, drained your balls and so be it. If she wants to come around and fvck you again then she will find a reason to, but if not who gives a shyt you already fvkced her once. Why you sounding like a fcvking jilted lover over some one off slut?