Waking Up's Approach Journal

[Waking Up]

Background: I'm 20 years old live in a boring town and I'm really skinny (140 lbs 6 ft yeah I'm working on it, working out and eating more) And I'm not the most masculine looking guy (not bad looking either, I'm handsome but the problem is that I have some feminine elements) I have a deep voice, I'm one of those sarcastic humorous nerds who can make people laugh and shoot the **** pretty well, but my issue is that I think too damn much about social interaction and I have been philosophizing my life/women away and need to take ACTION. Nothing going on here not a lot of young people just a mall bookstores and such. I've got the community college campus as well but I'm going to use that leisurely because of connections and reputation.

I've had four girlfriends, been laid by about seven or eight women and have had a couple of ONS. I'm by no means exceptional with the ladies and I know I'm not fulfilling my potential socially at all, though working on it slowly. I've had social anxiety for as long as I can remember, but I still have friends and have managed to grin and bear it through life pretty well. Women for some reason, I've always felt this inferiority thing like I either have to look down at them and present myself as arrogant or act completely asexual. I wish to rid myself of this habit, obviously the times I did succeed were when I was bold and confident, but my past was riddled with bold and confident arrogance, deep down I was still insecure and I only was succeeding with LSE chicks.

I want to be able to communicate with a woman directly and confidently without putting her on the pedestal or acting with a fake insecure arrogance, I want both of us to be equal, with me leading and showing manliness and sexuality. In order to reach this level though, I have to go out and approach, crash and burn, and learn it the hard way I guess. My goal is just to get over the major amount of AA I have, I'm hoping that by doing cold approaching, it'll not only help me in approaching strangers but just in communicating with women part of my social circle as well. Does anyone else have experience with that? Getting better at the CAs, and then social circles feeling like a breeze after you've got stranger experience under your belt?

I'm expecting failure and embracing it at the same time. I just want to be able to walk up to a woman without thinking and become comfortable doing it, I think it'll really help me in all social areas. Guys are no problem, obviously.

Basically, I just want motivation and critiques. I've been theorizing about women for too long (in fact one of my biggest problems is that my mind is infatuated with too much theory, I'm too inside my own head.) I want motivation, I want you guys to tell me to grow a sack, I want to be pushed. I just don't know where to begin. I've read other approach journals where they started off with very straight forward, unsuccessful openers such as "Are you single?" But these guys just did it to get over their AA and it seemed to work, so maybe I'll do the same thing and mix it up with some opinion or just some of my own game and just spout the first thing that comes to my head. Who knows.

Anyway wish me luck.

 

[Mars]

Good Luck! I love seeing approach journals, I see them as great inspirations.

 

[Waking Up]

Alright. Went out with a couple of buddies today and did some approaches. Quite a few actually, women were generally positive. I still get massive AA though obviously and I have trouble thinking of what to say. Anyway, ended up being with a friend of mine who is natural alpha. I'm one of those intelligent over analytical guys (I hate it) and he makes a lot of smalltalk but can hold reality for 10 minutes, it's remarkable. He'll talk about the most inane **** like parents limiting him or giving him a lot of chores in the house, but I guess that proves it's all DELIVERY. I need help in delivery, if anything. I really, if it even requires using my intelligence, want to learn how to hold reality that long even if it's bs boring talk the girls were engaged by how he was speaking. I made a couple approaches myself, quick, got some kino and a # so it wasn't horrible but man I have so much improving to do. I want to be able to just keep spoutiing off the bs and hold reality like my friend does, it's remarkable. He approaches this really hot blonde at a parlor and just made casual smalltalk, got her # and was so smooth and talked for 10 minutes or so and me and my other friend didn't get a word in.

I don't have any dialogues at the moment hardly but for the most part I just made genuine smalltalk or w.e., no big deal. I'll have dialogue next time when I do sets by myself. My question to the forum is I guess I just need to gain more confidence in speaking my mind and letting it flow, problem is I never know what to say I feel like all talk is inane and pointless it's so hard to explain it's like I have to fake the smalltalk.

I'm asking you guys how to get assisted in holding reality and such, etc. and just getting better at it. I guess keep pushing yourself out of comfort zone iunno but if there's any secrets you guys learned used, meditation, affirmatives, whatever please share because although I did ok I feel like I never know what to say past a few one liners.

Overall though I'm quite pleased as I did get a little better today and stepped out of my comfort zone a bit.

 

[Waking Up]

bump. will be going out today any last minute tips or input mucho appreciato.

 

[Waking Up]

Anyway we've been sarging, quite a bit, just me and my friend now. Some approaches go ok, we haven't been closing though just practicing. The other day my game shot up and his went down ironically (and I felt "flow" for bit the more I did it) of course it comes and goes but w.e.

I number closed one girl working that seemed pretty interested. We hung out at a massage accessory store and I played around with their robot. I approached one of the employees, but before then we just acted normal and asked a couple of questions about the products, there was also two girls, one cute, sitting on the massage chairs that my friend was attempting to mack on with his body language. One of the employees was HB7, the other HB8 that my friend began an interaction with.

I walk over to one of the employees -

Me: Hey, what's up with that robot you have on display over there? Can I play with it? (smiles)
HB7: Sure. Yeah. Just don't take it out of the store.

I walk over and grab the controller and begin operating it. I move it over to one of the employees and I start jokingly moving it back and forth like it's doing a dance. She smiles.

Me: So, do you mess with this thing when you're bored?
HB7: Yes. Although mostly the customers play with it.
Me: Why doesn't it have a wave feature? This thing doesn't seem friendly at all.
HB7: *laughs* Although it can do this. (she shows me how it can take out a camera and whatnot)
*fluff a bit at this point I run out of things to say. I need to get myself out of question mode and just make general statements like an alpha does. Would probably help my game eh. Anyway I get bored with HB7 she doesn't seem to interesting of a converser so I move over to HB8 and my friend and something clicks*

Me: Hey
HB8: Hi
Friend: *continues speaking*
Me: So this place is exciting eh? You guys just stand here and smile.
HB8: *laughs* Yeah. We get bored here a lot.
Me: Just in time for us to come in and spice things up.
Friend: Yup.
*I move the robot around a bit and fluff occurs and somehow we get to some good convo about our names*
HB8: Wow, you have a really unique name.
Me: Thanks yeah. I noticed all three of us have exotic names. We should start a posse.
HB8: Blah blah *more stuff about her name I keep her talking a bit with a couple of questions*

We walk back over to the massage chairs where my friend occasionally fluffs one of the targets sitting there. Eventually the girl stood up and said "you want this homeboy" and we took the massage chairs. Little did I know that although we didn't conversate with these girls, they were acting rather odd. They continued to EC us from a distance and at one point they start dancing and banging their butts together in a corner. Me and my friend did nothing though. As we're sitting there, HB8 comes over and we talk about the features of the massage machine.

Me: This thing is really relaxing. But show me something else it does.
HB8: Well, it plays music and has an ipod.
Me: Oh really? Where?
HB8: *pulls it out and scrolls through it*
Me: Pick me a sexy song.
HB8: *laughs* ok here we go

Suddenly Santana is bursting really loud, my friend, her, and I all start laughing. I look at her with EC.

Me: Haha. This looks like we're relaxing on a beach somewhere. There's the waves.
*At this point I had overtaken the reality a bit, so my friend was attempting to recouperate his, I felt extremely relaxed.*
HB8: Haha, you look so relaxed right now. (ironically she said that)
*more fluff don't remember*

We decide to leave the store and close HB8 since I felt like I had gotten some nice ioiz. My friend made the mistake of giving her #z which I corrected him on later. Anyway I walked over to her and said "Nah that's k just give me your # instead." And she said "Alright. Yeah cool" and seemed enthusiastic, like she doesn't get out a lot or something. She also said she doesn't party a lot, which she brought up. But w.e. it was a successful # close in my mind, well maybe not fully, but it's a step. I called her last night for a get together we were having she didn't call back though. Whatever. It was good practice.

Anyway we hit up some other locations, some burns, some not really worth it but we wind up running into a girl that we knew at high school, I never really communicated with her so my friend initiated the approach. She has a really cool personality, but is a HB6 but her personality makes her shine a lot. We start talking to her effortlessly. She's an intelligent girl so I could bounce off the wall with whatever associations or jokes I had in mind, it just felt so at ease, like she got it. She got giggly at nearly everything I said, she had a bf though, I didn't # close but w.e. I felt very much at flow with her we talked for 20 minutes straight. I had so much fun I don't even remember the dialogue, lmao.

Overall it was a good experience but I've got a long way to go. Smalltalk is getting a tiny bit better, but I need to learn more direct game like how j0n does it in his FRz.

 

[Get-With-It]

Nice approaches man. I can tell you're gonna improve quick

 

[Waking Up]

Thanks yeah. I think one of my biggest issues is vocal annunciation and body language. A lot of times I'll say the wittiest things but either the girl is too dumb to get it, or I'm just not speaking the right way, not the right tonality to click with the woman. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm trying to find my vocal niche, or a comfortable speaking voice without overthinking how i'm sounding.

Anyway another FR should be up soon. I'd like to try some direct approaches so if anyone has any tips or starts for the direct (I don't mind getting burned, I'm just getting bored of smalltalk approaches cuz they aren't really going anywhere) then post some.

 

[Waking Up]

Update: There's a girl that works at a pizza place that I see occasionally whenever I go in. We're usually pretty friendly with each other and I make EC, she's shy and submissive and I like her feminine vibe. Anyway I would crack the occasional joke whenever I go in about w.e., and she usually would get a little giggly no matter what I said, she seems shy though like her head will tilt down a bit and she'll start laughing and she smiles whenever we look at each other.

Anyway for a while, although we don't really know each other I've wanted to # close. Perfectly viable right? I mean why not? So I saw her today and tried it out. Quick exchange of words and I asked her what she likes to do for fun.

Me: So what do you like to do for fun?
Her: (shyly) Um, I don't know... I like to read, I guess
Me: (coyly) Ah, a girl that reads
Her: *smiles*
Me: So are you a fun girl?
Her: I like to party a lot
Me: Cool. Well give me your number and we'll party.

She was still exchanging cash for me, but it worried me a bit since she didn't react right away (me being over-analytical) then again she was working and giving me cash and about to get the pizza as I asked. When I asked she didn't really respond, she kind of looked down while counting the money and cracked a smile for 2 seconds. I walked over to get my food with my cell phone open.

Me: Ok, and your number is?
Her: #
Me: k cool, I'll give you a ring
Her: ok enjoy your pizza

We'll see I guess. I'll give her a ring, if it works, whatever, if it doesn't, whatever, at least I tried.

 

[Waking Up]

Bumping this up. It's been a longass time and I'm gonna start running approaches again. I chickened out of the process so if someone could post me some openers, or links to get me going, would be cool.

 

[macallik]

I'm expecting failure and embracing it at the same time. I just want to be able to walk up to a woman without thinking and become comfortable doing it...

You typed this. You don't need any encouragement or advice, clearly you know what you have to do won't be easy. You are developing skills that will last you your life and improve the quality of life. 6 months of failure is nothing compared to that but if you dedicate yourself and try you will get success MUCH quicker than 6 months anyway