"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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waiting too long to contact with a cold approach

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pete101

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can you wait too long to contact after getting a number from a cold approach?

i cold approached this hot girl on Saturday, spoke her language etc.. she was busy doing something so i knew i had to be quick in my pick up.

she told me to add her to facebook as well and i told her to add me though she probably couldn't find me seeing as i dont use my full name and a generic nickname where there are 1000s of profiles with similar, her name is generic too and she only gave me her 1st name.

anyway it's been 5 days now and i sent her a text asking what her full name was?

is this too long after an approach to be contacting her like this and really should be a phone call? i know you're suppose to text 2-3 days after if you plan to text and it has to be something funny/interesting.

i can imagine now whatever IL she had BECAUSE i was a cold approach must have waned seeing as it's been so long.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Pimp-sicle

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pete101 said:
can you wait too long to contact after getting a number from a cold approach?

Yes; especially with a cold approach who you don't spend too much time with before getting the number.

i cold approached this hot girl on Saturday, spoke her language etc.. she was busy doing something so i knew i had to be quick in my pick up.

Just because she was doing something, didn't mean you HAD TO be quick. When you get good at engaging someone in a conversation they can totally forget about what they were doing and the added benefit is you create, rapport, comfort and hopefully attraction in the process.

she told me to add her to facebook as well and i told her to add me though she probably couldn't find me seeing as i dont use my full name and a generic nickname where there are 1000s of profiles with similar, her name is generic too and she only gave me her 1st name.

anyway it's been 5 days now and i sent her a text asking what her full name was?

Why would you send her a text asking what her full name was? Why not call her and get those good vibes going again from the initial day you met her, then set up a date. Who cares about adding her to Facebook? And in my opinion you don't want a girl who you just met to see your Facebook since its like opening Pandora's box, she will make all sorts of assumptions based on what she sees, reads etc.

is this too long after an approach to be contacting her like this and really should be a phone call? i know you're suppose to text 2-3 days after if you plan to text and it has to be something funny/interesting.

Here's your problem; your trying to follow some sort of textbook rule, when really you should be figuring out how to get really really good at creating attraction and intrigue very quickly when you first meet these girls, so that the phone call, text or whatever method you choose to use to contact them is an after thought. When you do your job right at the initial meet, everything else falls into place. There's no set rule that says you have to wait 2-3 days to call after getting the number; that's simply a guideline for over-zealous chumps who want to call and reek of desperation later that same day.

i can imagine now whatever IL she had BECAUSE i was a cold approach must have waned seeing as it's been so long.

Her interest level didn't sound like it was too high to start off with and yes waiting 5 days probably didn't help your cause. If she doesn't respond to your text, I'd wait a couple days and give her a call. Don't mention the text and don't ask about her full name for the Facebook add, just focus on having a good conversation and then if that goes well ask her out.
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Mike32ct

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I agree with Pimpsicle.

Forget the Facebook junk. I would have either called her or worst case texted her to set up a meetup.

If she asks if you added her yet, just stall. "Yeah I will. I haven't had a chance." Then conveniently "forget.". Or better yet say "I'm not really on Facebook that much. I'll just text you."

Otherwise she can hide behind Facebook to avoid you and find out too much about you.

As a last ditch effort, call her and try to set something up.
 
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