"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Vortex = Don Juan DeMarco, bc
- Thread starter V0rt3x
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
WEEK #1
DAY 1
So this was my first day, btw the goal of the week 1, according to the Bible, is to say 50 hi/hello to total strangers (the more attractive girls - the better) and make 50 eye contacts with girls. So what did I try was basically go around and when spot a broad try to make an eye contact, first point eyes toward top of the head, the on her eyes and try unitl you make the cut, then put on a nice smile and show teeth (nothing's wrong with my teeth btw, white, nice and all other crap...) Then pass by her and say hi like we're old friends... So far so (how much) good? Did I understood it well?
Now what did I do? Ofcourse I was nervous and othel sh!t :nervous: so nothing gone right... The goal was to do that 7 times to 7 diffrents people – 50/7=7+one day 8 (I tried only on girls) Now the cruel facts:
I had only 4 chances, I tried it only 3 times, I tried only once to say hi and to make eye contact and the girl looked at me like an idiot, 2 other girls didn't even realize I was looking at them. Failed miserably
Notes: (someone said its good to make notes so you remember the things what happened and how did you feel and stuff - so I give it a try)
1.)Noticed that I can't find a good spot to watch around, so I walked around, result - noone around cuz everyone are going somewhere, nobody looks at anyone, and girls run in packs so you get ****1ng embaressed,
2.)You can't work (lol ) not even on a train station, where everybody stand still and look around. Problem: they look around for trains, check time, too much people - too crowded...
So the major problem was where to go? I didn't feel like going into a park downtown (whole bunch of them) cuz usually only couples there and getting killed by her jealous boyfriend on my first try isn't my idea of being a dj ... I coudln't go around, not even stand still. Also I had problems with keeping an eye contact. I've met a pretty cute girl (I'm a newbie so I just walk through streets around and make eye contact with girls from opposite direction - I know it's wrong but don't have any ideas where to try else...), she walked with (her I guess) granny and rolled eyes while granny was just being casually boring. I looked at her, she looked at me and smiled (missed a sure thing) but I broke eye contact so she did too and just walked away... What a miserable day…
Comments, tips and stuff - all welcome
DAY 1
So this was my first day, btw the goal of the week 1, according to the Bible, is to say 50 hi/hello to total strangers (the more attractive girls - the better) and make 50 eye contacts with girls. So what did I try was basically go around and when spot a broad try to make an eye contact, first point eyes toward top of the head, the on her eyes and try unitl you make the cut, then put on a nice smile and show teeth (nothing's wrong with my teeth btw, white, nice and all other crap...) Then pass by her and say hi like we're old friends... So far so (how much) good? Did I understood it well?
Now what did I do? Ofcourse I was nervous and othel sh!t :nervous: so nothing gone right... The goal was to do that 7 times to 7 diffrents people – 50/7=7+one day 8 (I tried only on girls) Now the cruel facts:
I had only 4 chances, I tried it only 3 times, I tried only once to say hi and to make eye contact and the girl looked at me like an idiot, 2 other girls didn't even realize I was looking at them. Failed miserably Notes: (someone said its good to make notes so you remember the things what happened and how did you feel and stuff - so I give it a try)
1.)Noticed that I can't find a good spot to watch around, so I walked around, result - noone around cuz everyone are going somewhere, nobody looks at anyone, and girls run in packs so you get ****1ng embaressed,
2.)You can't work (lol
) not even on a train station, where everybody stand still and look around. Problem: they look around for trains, check time, too much people - too crowded...So the major problem was where to go? I didn't feel like going into a park downtown (whole bunch of them) cuz usually only couples there and getting killed by her jealous boyfriend on my first try isn't my idea of being a dj
... I coudln't go around, not even stand still. Also I had problems with keeping an eye contact. I've met a pretty cute girl (I'm a newbie so I just walk through streets around and make eye contact with girls from opposite direction - I know it's wrong but don't have any ideas where to try else...), she walked with (her I guess) granny and rolled eyes while granny was just being casually boring. I looked at her, she looked at me and smiled (missed a sure thing) but I broke eye contact so she did too and just walked away... What a miserable day…Comments, tips and stuff - all welcome
So pimp its scary
Master Don Juan
Why do you feel that it was a bad day? So, you made and held eye contact with 4 women, and said hi to 1. You have 6 more days... Let me tell you that you did better than I did the first time I went through the Boot Camp.
What I would recommend is don't think about it so much... you are making a big deal out of nothing. What is the worst, ABSOLUTE worst thing that could happen??? Well... you've probably been through it already... damn that was harsh.
You know WHY trains are great for approaching?? BECAUSE nobody else does it!!! "Hi excuse me, which train goes to so and so street?" "This train" "Thank you, wow that's an intense necklace you have... how do they get the plastic to shine so much??*Big cheezy, I'm just joking kind of grin*" Then I just take it from there... then as soon as I've built rapport, if I pull it off,"well, that trains coming next, give me your number so we can go out for coffee and a good conversation sometime soon."
Don't go and try that one just yet by the way, your not at that point yet. The only problem is that I can't communicate voice tone and body language, which is 93% of any interaction... the words are the other 7%. Does that boggle your mind? 93% of what you say is said without even opening your mouth.
I'm starting to think that your old yourself, constantly flirting with retired chicks and grandmothers of 90. Unless old people is just your 'thing'...
The biggest thing blocking you is that you have believed alot of the wrong things in your past, and it is holding you back at this point. It's time to relook into some of your beliefs that you hold and see if they really make sense... Get an NLP book if you want more information on that. Actually, I've got a list of books too long to mention right now that I would higly recommend.
The internal game stuff is just as important as getting the balls to go up and do something about it... just keep flexing those balls of yours for the next few days and you'll start to feel it. Don't be ashamed to want to restart the boot camp either... it's taken 3 tries to get through the full deal to my satisfaction.
What I would recommend is don't think about it so much... you are making a big deal out of nothing. What is the worst, ABSOLUTE worst thing that could happen??? Well... you've probably been through it already... damn that was harsh.
You know WHY trains are great for approaching?? BECAUSE nobody else does it!!! "Hi excuse me, which train goes to so and so street?" "This train" "Thank you, wow that's an intense necklace you have... how do they get the plastic to shine so much??*Big cheezy, I'm just joking kind of grin*" Then I just take it from there... then as soon as I've built rapport, if I pull it off,"well, that trains coming next, give me your number so we can go out for coffee and a good conversation sometime soon."
Don't go and try that one just yet by the way, your not at that point yet. The only problem is that I can't communicate voice tone and body language, which is 93% of any interaction... the words are the other 7%. Does that boggle your mind? 93% of what you say is said without even opening your mouth.
I'm starting to think that your old yourself, constantly flirting with retired chicks and grandmothers of 90. Unless old people is just your 'thing'...
The biggest thing blocking you is that you have believed alot of the wrong things in your past, and it is holding you back at this point. It's time to relook into some of your beliefs that you hold and see if they really make sense... Get an NLP book if you want more information on that. Actually, I've got a list of books too long to mention right now that I would higly recommend.
The internal game stuff is just as important as getting the balls to go up and do something about it... just keep flexing those balls of yours for the next few days and you'll start to feel it. Don't be ashamed to want to restart the boot camp either... it's taken 3 tries to get through the full deal to my satisfaction.
So pimp its scary
Master Don Juan
I would highly recommend David D's DVD program, it's not the end and be all, but it does cover ALOT. BTW, I don't get paid to say that, just use your filesharing solution, personally I found the 'torrents'.
What tells you that you can't make and hold eye contact?
First book that I would recommend... 'feel the fear and do it anyway' actually, I would recommend going through the 'self-help' or psychology section of your local bookstore... find one that pops out for you personnaly, or pick the top 3 and drop it down to the most applicable book for yourself.
What tells you that you can't make and hold eye contact?
First book that I would recommend... 'feel the fear and do it anyway' actually, I would recommend going through the 'self-help' or psychology section of your local bookstore... find one that pops out for you personnaly, or pick the top 3 and drop it down to the most applicable book for yourself.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
DAY 2
So todays the end of day 2 and it sucked even more then day 1 I must say... But Im learning somthing from psychology books (thank you for a wonderful advice) and that optimism is a way to self-esteem and confidence... I made only 1 eye contact but i did it good, and i bet if i had a move on her (with any confidence at all) she would be mine... Btw i woke up 15.00 and did nothing until 19.30 when i went movies with my dad (he insisted... ). Just for the record i'm 14 (lol right?) ill be 15 in october, but i think i belong here. My horoscope says good times coming mate in sexual life if you have the proper knowledge (huh?). but i have some xp already. I had 2 relations with (lets say 6-7) hot girls, one ended she showing me her tits. you can call me a natural talent but i prefer to say lucky guy... REALLY lucky... so basically what i whant is to take that luck into my own hands (i get smiles and all that crap from nice chicks but i dont dare to come near them) so here i am...
So todays the end of day 2 and it sucked even more then day 1 I must say... But Im learning somthing from psychology books (thank you for a wonderful advice) and that optimism is a way to self-esteem and confidence... I made only 1 eye contact but i did it good, and i bet if i had a move on her (with any confidence at all) she would be mine... Btw i woke up 15.00 and did nothing until 19.30 when i went movies with my dad (he insisted...
). Just for the record i'm 14 (lol right?) ill be 15 in october, but i think i belong here. My horoscope says good times coming mate in sexual life if you have the proper knowledge (huh?). but i have some xp already. I had 2 relations with (lets say 6-7) hot girls, one ended she showing me her tits. you can call me a natural talent but i prefer to say lucky guy... REALLY lucky... so basically what i whant is to take that luck into my own hands (i get smiles and all that crap from nice chicks but i dont dare to come near them) so here i am...vort some more help for you
Okay, here I will tell you a little bit about me, I used to have some of the same problems as you starting out in my game, you probably feel ugly, like every girl is gonna reject you, but heres a definet plus about you, bud you just dont give up, and if you keep up an attitude like that your bound to get somewhere, see where Im comin from? From your experiences now,(and I was told this by a pal of mine), if you manage to keep trying and dont give up, you will probably be one of the biggest playerz around... ALSO... forget that DJ Bible or whatever, once youve got what I posted below completely figured out, you will eventually be able to figure out your own style of mackin
NOW..... heres some info Ive told you before, but Ive focused this stuff more on you (what you probably need to hear)
#1- girls are just human beings like me and you, NOTHING ELSE
#2- RELAX
#3- You need something, anything to boost your confidence, I suggest a little TOO $HORT music, if you dont know about him look it up, easily my favorite, this guy knows the game
... also, how do you feel you look? work on your appearance, obviously I dont know what you look like, but if you feel you need to alter something, do it.
#4- after youve done what I said on top.... take a deep breath and relax haha ... get some good clothes, I recommend some sensual hollister, or abercrombie and fitch type stuff, gel your hair too, I hear most gals think thats hott lol
#5- RELAX!- NOW, 1st complete what I told you to do above.... let these broads come to you, if you realize a broad glancing at you, simple, shes yours, if shes up to your standard, just say hi, or whats up, RELAX, tell her what you think of her, if you wanna get to know her better tell her, and then get to know this broad better, ask questions, be bold and street smart.
remember you will get rejected!... Im not afraid to admit that I have, I have no beautiful girls right now, because I just lost 'em tonight haha, but there was a time when I was IN LOVE WITH this girl, who wasnt even that cute,but I loved this girl, and she broke my heart, so just RELAX... please do what I have told you to do and you will be succesful, if you have questions come to me, need some reassurance? come to me, Ill be your pal and wingman :cheer: lol
Okay, here I will tell you a little bit about me, I used to have some of the same problems as you starting out in my game, you probably feel ugly, like every girl is gonna reject you, but heres a definet plus about you, bud you just dont give up, and if you keep up an attitude like that your bound to get somewhere, see where Im comin from? From your experiences now,(and I was told this by a pal of mine), if you manage to keep trying and dont give up, you will probably be one of the biggest playerz around... ALSO... forget that DJ Bible or whatever, once youve got what I posted below completely figured out, you will eventually be able to figure out your own style of mackin
NOW..... heres some info Ive told you before, but Ive focused this stuff more on you (what you probably need to hear)
#1- girls are just human beings like me and you, NOTHING ELSE
#2- RELAX
#3- You need something, anything to boost your confidence, I suggest a little TOO $HORT music, if you dont know about him look it up, easily my favorite, this guy knows the game
... also, how do you feel you look? work on your appearance, obviously I dont know what you look like, but if you feel you need to alter something, do it.#4- after youve done what I said on top.... take a deep breath and relax haha
... get some good clothes, I recommend some sensual hollister, or abercrombie and fitch type stuff, gel your hair too, I hear most gals think thats hott lol #5- RELAX!- NOW, 1st complete what I told you to do above.... let these broads come to you, if you realize a broad glancing at you, simple, shes yours, if shes up to your standard, just say hi, or whats up, RELAX, tell her what you think of her, if you wanna get to know her better tell her, and then get to know this broad better, ask questions, be bold and street smart.
remember you will get rejected!... Im not afraid to admit that I have, I have no beautiful girls right now, because I just lost 'em tonight haha, but there was a time when I was IN LOVE WITH this girl, who wasnt even that cute,but I loved this girl, and she broke my heart, so just RELAX... please do what I have told you to do and you will be succesful, if you have questions come to me, need some reassurance? come to me, Ill be your pal and wingman :cheer: lol
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So pimp its scary
Master Don Juan
I have to agree with you on that post ironman22. Powerful shyt...
Anyway vortex... stop thinking it's a bad day. It was not ideal, but things practically never end up ideally. but you are still 1 closer to accomplishing your goal, which if you go all out 1 day you could finish. Just say hi to everyone, what's the worst that they do??? I'll tell you, they keep walking... even if they say hi back it's not like they will stop and you'll have to think of something to say. (If they are talking to themselves, then just walk past them with no eye contact, look straight ahead.)
Since you're 14, I'm gonna have to adjust some of my advice... but by the sound of things your off to a good start.
As for rejections, if you are that nervous with your approaches at first, you can expect that out of every ten women you approach you will get 3 numbers, out of 3 numbers 1 will be real, etc.
The more comfortable that you get approaching (which sometimes it's beneficial to feign a hint of nervousness to calm the woman... let her think that you're not a prostar player) the fewer rejctions that your gonna get overall. There have been nights where I've got 12 (7real) phone numbers in a bar night... other times, it's felt like I've been shot down by most every chick in the bar. Ironman22 is right that you gotta take rejections in stride.
Anyway vortex... stop thinking it's a bad day. It was not ideal, but things practically never end up ideally. but you are still 1 closer to accomplishing your goal, which if you go all out 1 day you could finish. Just say hi to everyone, what's the worst that they do??? I'll tell you, they keep walking... even if they say hi back it's not like they will stop and you'll have to think of something to say. (If they are talking to themselves, then just walk past them with no eye contact, look straight ahead.)
Since you're 14, I'm gonna have to adjust some of my advice... but by the sound of things your off to a good start.
As for rejections, if you are that nervous with your approaches at first, you can expect that out of every ten women you approach you will get 3 numbers, out of 3 numbers 1 will be real, etc.
The more comfortable that you get approaching (which sometimes it's beneficial to feign a hint of nervousness to calm the woman... let her think that you're not a prostar player) the fewer rejctions that your gonna get overall. There have been nights where I've got 12 (7real) phone numbers in a bar night... other times, it's felt like I've been shot down by most every chick in the bar. Ironman22 is right that you gotta take rejections in stride.
SOMETHING MY OLD MAN JUST NOW TAUGHT ME
So, me and the old man were sitting outside tonight, I told him that I had to talk to him in private, well, b/c I screwed it up with mah gal (Hott girl 10.0 and 19 yrs), NOW, if ya'll are wondering where I get my game, its from my pops and of coarse the one and only Dommega ... but anyway it seems that shed lost interest in me and decided to ignore me, after having this long talk with the old man we came up with one answer... this should help alotta you aspiring playerz...
well here it is..
#1. this girl was obviously physically attracted to me from the start.
#2. I was terribly self absorbed when speaking with her
#3. obviously a turn off I didnt realize that
solution- try letting some focus off of yourself altogether and ask this girl some questions, to become close, whats that **** called again? rapport. break that broad IN ... get her to talk about herself, ask questions so you both feel at ease, I fuond my mistake, but I was ignorant before not knowing how much of an idiot I was being, YES, SHE WAS PHYSICALLY (SEXUALLY) attracted and thats how I got her, this is one of the reasons I greatly recommend working on your looks.
as for this broad, I will try callin her tommorow and apologizing and ****, but if I dont get a call back I aint sweatin' it, one mistake and there are plenty more Smokin Hott broads out there although it hurts to lose one thats 3 yrs older than me and very attractive :woo:
thanks Pops love you
So, me and the old man were sitting outside tonight, I told him that I had to talk to him in private, well, b/c I screwed it up with mah gal (Hott girl 10.0 and 19 yrs), NOW, if ya'll are wondering where I get my game, its from my pops and of coarse the one and only Dommega
... but anyway it seems that shed lost interest in me and decided to ignore me, after having this long talk with the old man we came up with one answer... this should help alotta you aspiring playerz...well here it is..
#1. this girl was obviously physically attracted to me from the start.
#2. I was terribly self absorbed when speaking with her
#3. obviously a turn off I didnt realize that
solution- try letting some focus off of yourself altogether and ask this girl some questions, to become close, whats that **** called again? rapport. break that broad IN
... get her to talk about herself, ask questions so you both feel at ease, I fuond my mistake, but I was ignorant before not knowing how much of an idiot I was being, YES, SHE WAS PHYSICALLY (SEXUALLY) attracted and thats how I got her, this is one of the reasons I greatly recommend working on your looks.as for this broad, I will try callin her tommorow and apologizing and ****, but if I dont get a call back I aint sweatin' it, one mistake and there are plenty more Smokin Hott broads out there although it hurts to lose one thats 3 yrs older than me and very attractive :woo:
thanks Pops love you
ok ok i get it guys... just one more thing: ive read a lot of articles around here and i think they all have the same flaw -- they say you are the man and crap alike AND THAT YOU PICK THE CHICK and that is SOOOOOO wrong. it seems to me like we are on the market and chicks go around and pick merchandise (us) which they like. You cant make a real move on her until she glances at you, looks at you and smiles and similiar ****... THATS JUST NOT FAIR
as for u ironman... you could be right. dj bible could be just crap written by some guy who just jerks home and has nothing to do, but either way i'm gonna finish the boot camp. im gonna finish your boot camp (or any help you give me) and helps from everyone else... ONE of them should probably be working -- i dont care which one just as it works not that im saying some work some dont -- they just work differently on different people.. whish me luck :cheer:
as for u ironman... you could be right. dj bible could be just crap written by some guy who just jerks home and has nothing to do, but either way i'm gonna finish the boot camp. im gonna finish your boot camp (or any help you give me) and helps from everyone else... ONE of them should probably be working -- i dont care which one just as it works
not that im saying some work some dont -- they just work differently on different people.. whish me luck :cheer:"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
just remember all the **** from the above posts, put together that **** is POWERFUL, esspecially realizing how slef absorbed I was with this broad, that was my missing link.
As for my "boot camp".... dont consider it that, man I want you to enjoy yourself while your doing this ****, have fun man.
your game can always improve as Ive just learned.......
As for my "boot camp".... dont consider it that, man I want you to enjoy yourself while your doing this ****, have fun man.
your game can always improve as Ive just learned.......
DAY 3
I think i did it... i didnt try, didnt do anything special, i just walked (or drove on my skate) and said hi/hello to 27 girls (i think more but i lost count) which i also used for eyecontact and stuff... i think i have no fear from that anymore, no prob at all... tommorow im gonna try again (it could be just skate) but i really think this week is over for me lol
I think i did it... i didnt try, didnt do anything special, i just walked (or drove on my skate) and said hi/hello to 27 girls (i think more but i lost count) which i also used for eyecontact and stuff... i think i have no fear from that anymore, no prob at all... tommorow im gonna try again (it could be just skate) but i really think this week is over for me lol
So pimp its scary
Master Don Juan
It's true, you had one good day, now take that momentum and bring it into tomorrow...
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.