Visiting her Ex...?

[Alkali]

Right. New information here. So I have this amazing girl all set up. She told me awhile ago that she would be leaving for two weeks and wouldn't tell me why. Well now she told me.

She will be flying up to her ex-boyfriend, now in college, and be staying with him. The arrangement was apparently made when they were still together. I don't really care that she can't refund her ticket, told me multiple times that she liked me and expects me to do something, or that she called him a jerk (that word actually alarmed me.) This is just plain fukcen weird. So how exactly would you react? I haven't really brought it up.

 

[SickAgain]

She probably can refund the ticket. Either way your girlfriend likes another guy.

 

[Alkali]

Not my girlfriend btw, but a girl that everyone, her friends/my friends, expects to become my girlfriend. But yeah, Danger, that's what I'm thinking. Thanks for pointing out the obvious...she'll more than likely hook up.

So care to give me advice on what to do about it? Just let it go by, wait it out? Drop her altogether? Progress faster and trust her? I like her alot, she's pretty much perfect. But this is a head-scratcher. It's possible that they'll just hang out as friends, she's been very, almost neurotically, loyal and is very sweet. But this is her old flame...so that's probably a delusion.

 

[Microfiltered]

Yeah Danger said it best, she obviously still likes this guy. At least enough to go for a ride on his emotional rollercoaster. She’ll probably **** him. Not really a big deal though. Just tell her to be safe cause you want to **** her when she gets back.

 

[Alkali]

Before I answer your latest post,



Expand on this for me.

Before I met her I was in the process of getting with another girl before cutting it off. Word got around that I like to play games (and I don't, that other girl was fukcen psycho) and she's apparently been taken for a loop before and doesn't want to be hurt.

We're both in high school. She leaves in about two weeks for two weeks.

So she point blank asked me if I was just fooling around or was planning to actually do something because she liked me alot. I was pretty sly and handled it rather brilliantly (if I do say so myself.) But since then she's been reminding me that she likes me (and therefore, expects something to happen.)

Oh, and when we first kind of unofficially committed to one another she saw me in an awkward position with another girl. It was kind of a classic, soap opera-ish scene actually. Needless to say, that didn't really help. I know she saw but she refuses to bring it up and I'm kind of thankful I guess. Since then I've been good though.

And now I don't think it's a good time to get attached.

 

[Alkali]

Please tell me this isn't the guy she's visiting.



So have you had sex yet? Has she explained herself when she says "She expects something to happen" or asking if you're "planning to do something"?



Too vague, her actions in boarding that plane indicate that there is no commitment.

And what's her college status?

Sorry, I edit alot.

1. Don't know, I haven't brought it up. But I wouldn't think so considering they were together for a year.

2. Haven't done siht yet. She's understandably frustrated. She expects me to ask her out.

3. Well, aside from that, she expects me to be good and I expect the same.

4. We're highschool seniors.

 

[skirtChaser]

shes not perfect if shes pulling 5hit like that.

shes not special if she pulls 5hit like that.

again, tell her you want to meet this dude and that if he is cool that you want to tag team her with him. go into detail, tell her you want to suck your hog while she gets porked in the rear, and then give the big high five tag and switch. let her know this is how ridiculous this is. call her bluff, tell her you will refund her for the ticket. tell her you will give her face value for the ticket and then she won't lose any money. I bet she stubbles on that one. she is playing you, maybe you don't know the truth, maybe he dumped her and you are backup and she is using you to get him back and as soon as she does, later. you're getting played

 

[Alkali]

This dude's a few thousand miles away and I'm not going to pay and miss school to visit her ex. And there's no chance in hell of me refunding her for the ticket. She's not really that way either. Straight to the point doesn't apply to the girls I'm interested in.

So you think she should dump tickets, which she can't refund (allegedly, but she strikes me as an honest person) for a guy that she's had a fling with for less than a month? That doesn't add up.

 

[Microfiltered]

tell her you want to suck your hog while she gets porked in the rear

This is pretty ****ing funny but I don’t think she’ll buy it. I could be wrong, but I don’t think Alkali can suck his own “hog” :yes:

 

[Alkali]

She's in High School and she's going to miss two weeks of class? And her parents are ok with her visiting this guy during school?

I can tell you right now this is the wrong time of life to be "serious" about a girl. Forget the word commitment until you're at least 25 and probalby 30. Now is the time to have fun and find what kinds of girls you like best.

This of course, does not address your original problem of "how to handle this". At this stage I would question a girl taking time away from school, home and the guy she LIKES to spend two weeks at a COLLEGE with a guy she USED to date.

Like it or not, she's going to be in the biggest party environment she has ever been in and with two weeks to spend there I would bet she won't be having milk and cookies.

How guilty would you feel if YOU were going away to see an ex-gf for two weeks? If you would feel guilty enough to cancel, then she holds all of the cards in this "relationship".

I would guess that her parents were chummy with the kid. I don't know if I'd feel guilty. I know I'd have some self-control. Ah siht, who am I kidding, no I wouldn't.

Analysis is nice but advice is even better. I used the word commitment loosely. Meaning that my lips are exclusively hers and, likewise, hers are only mine. Of course now I don't know what's going on. That's why advice would be helpful right now.

I'm guessing flat out dump her is what you're suggesting?

 

[Alkali]

This is pretty ****ing funny but I don’t think she’ll buy it. I could be wrong, but I don’t think Alkali can suck his own “hog” :yes:

And you can...? Congratulations! That's disgusting but good for you!

 

[Alkali]

She's going on the trip. I don't think it's a possibility for her not to. It's been arranged and all that junk. So then, I start fooling around with other girls then. How depressing. Should I just hop on this tomorrow or wait until after she come back or...yeah, I don't know.

 

[Alkali]

I don't know; a week and a half. We're good, great even. She likes me, but I'm starting to wish she were obsessive (like the previous, psycho girl) rather than, I don't know, a strange type of shyness. I just saw her today. But I'm far too concerned with her for my own good. I've voiced that here before though.

 

[Microfiltered]

And you can...? Congratulations! That's disgusting but good for you!

No I can’t, nor did I imply that I could. I was simply poking fun at a typo that was made by skirtChaser. Sure it might have been lame, but given my emotional and logical needs at the time, it was a decision I made that I felt was best. Destiny if you will.
Anyways, that sucks that she’s going to visit her “ex”, but you’re a Senior Don Juan so I’m sure you’ll keep it positive. Other then that, I don't really know what you're looking for.

 

[jimmyjack]

Hum i found out that guys in this site are just too attached to thier girls, is like they are going to lose her and it's going to be hard for them to get another girl anyway if my girl is visiting her ex then for sure am visiting someone else too there is no problem about it.let her visit her ex one day i will tell her to return to her ex.