"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Victory, for my son and I!

TheLadiesMan

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After years of fighting tooth and nail, and ultimately, begging, just to see my son, I finally achieved what I've worked hard for... thanks to the help of the mediator, my friends, my family.

I didn't get every other week, but instead, got 2 days out of the week + every other weekend. (which in some cases I'd have him for 5 days on my weekends.)

I get all the holidays, special days, Spring Break, etc. on even years.

I will be involved in deciding education, health, and religion.

From the time he is let out on Summer Break, I will have him EVERY OTHER WEEK till the end of July!!! :rock:

On the issue of Safety: No one other than his biological family can do punish him. Physically, only his Mom & Dad.

HealthCare: She wasn't for the idea of whoever could get it cheaper, should provide Healthcare for our son. So we're both gonna provide for him, except I will also provide dental too.

School: He was bound for inner city schools, and I put and end to that. :) He now will enter a public school rated higher in academics than his Mom's previous choice.

I am pretty much awarded Shared Parenting, as it states on the legal court document. There were so much more but those were the most important issues.

The last topic the mediator brought up was tax exempt... for which she was very quick to shoot down. The mediator just looked at her like "...are you serious?" The judge, I think, will decide on that. I opted to go every other year, or whoever gets more back, and still no.

$560 a month in child support, and she still wants to be like this. Ok... I get my son, I'm happy, but I have another idea that she may go for. Reduce my child support enough so I can put him on my health insurance, and she can claim him. I pay that much every month, I should get half of the tax exempt in some form, and that sounds wise.

Anyway, my son is happy, and is here with me now, so we're gonna hangout, and I'm gonna teach him to tie his shoe.

A father's job is never done. :)
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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amoka

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How much is she paying you for the 2 days that you're having him?
 

Desert Fox

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Stories like this are inspiring and a constant reminder that I must never settle and thoroughly scout out a woman before having kids with her. Thanks for sharing and good luck with your son. Make sure he doesn't get brainwashed by what appears to be his wacko mom.
 

dark god

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congratz.
when was the last time u saw ur son prior to this?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ZenGodMod

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Been reading your posts about your son for quite sometime now and I most say your an inspiration.

You never gave up, never backed down and didn't walk away from your responsibilities as a father. For that you have my ultimate respect.
 

WaterTiger

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:cheer: :rockon: :cheer: Yay!!!!! :cheer: :rockon: :cheer:

I too have been following your semi-blog about this fight of yours and and delighted you will have more time with your son!

Rock on!
 

TheLadiesMan

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Thanks everyone, but it looks like I'll be fighting the good fight some more...

The mediator called me last week. He said my son's mom called and is now disputing some of the things we've already agreed upon. So now, we have to return and go over the concerns again with the mediator. He's not sure what those 'concerns' are but when he called to tell me this, my son and I were having lunch together.

It's still strange when I think about it but... before child support kicked in (taking out of my paycheck automatically) I was able to get him whenever I wanted. We were together ALL THE TIME. Once it kicked in, suddenly, I was only allowed to see him every other weekend. I was like wtf?!

The only thing this woman cares about is getting a check from me. I know this, the mediator knows this, and I hope the court system sees this too.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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penkitten

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it sounds like everything was all good in the mediator's office but then when she got home and told her momma and all her friends what happened, they brought up "dont let this happen and you're a fool" crap to her.
and now she wants to fight some more.

the judge will see this drama and will most likely say that it has already been agreed upon and it will stand as it is.

i am so very proud of you for going through with this and fighting for your parental rights. how happy you must feel to know that you are going to be involved and that that she does not get to take your time away and try to run the "i'm in control" game.
how happy your son must feel to be with daddy more often!

have a good time this weekend you lucky duck:)
 

TheLadiesMan

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penkitten said:
it sounds like everything was all good in the mediator's office but then when she got home and told her momma and all her friends what happened, they brought up "dont let this happen and you're a fool" crap to her.
and now she wants to fight some more.

the judge will see this drama and will most likely say that it has already been agreed upon and it will stand as it is.

i am so very proud of you for going through with this and fighting for your parental rights. how happy you must feel to know that you are going to be involved and that that she does not get to take your time away and try to run the "i'm in control" game.
how happy your son must feel to be with daddy more often!

have a good time this weekend you lucky duck:)
Thanks PK.... :flowers:

Not sure if I'd mentioned this but... my son can tie his shoe now. Taught him last weekend.
 

penkitten

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TheLadiesMan said:
Thanks PK.... :flowers:

Not sure if I'd mentioned this but... my son can tie his shoe now. Taught him last weekend.
that's why you rock at being a daddy!
 
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