Using School Directories

[The Amen Corner]

Hey guys,

I've been reading a lot of dating/pick up theory -- and my instincts tell me the best approach to sweep a girl off her feet would be to ask her for her number at some point at school.. 'closing', I suppose you guys refer to it as, after a brief yet funny/light convo.

However, I've just honestly been having issues approaching. I've had my buddies give me prep talks.. I've worked with the 5 second rule concept.. It's just difficult, since my fight or flight tendencies have been ingrained in me my entire life.... In fact, the last time I talked with this girl, I sat across the room for about 45 minutes contemplating it before finally doing so. Even when tweaked out on 3 monster energy drinks, I wasn't able to get past this threshold of mine.

..Anyway -- I mean could go get her number this second... I'd just need to turn to my school directory. I don't know if it would be a good idea though to just skip to this step and explain this in my opening statement when I call her -- or if by taking this easier approach I'm losing a valuable experience/opportunity both for my own personal self-esteem, but also to judge interest level and what not in its most completness.

I know this girl has at least a little bit of interest in me -- I'm just not sure if I should commit to the whole skipping the number-harvesting situation and just go straight to the phone. I'm afraid if I keep debating this, I'll lose my inertia, and she her scrap of interest.


Any ideas? Is it 'weird' or off setting to just call a girl using a directory number? This is a pretty quiet girl -- so I don't imagine she's too experienced with the phone. I imagine since she's pretty inexperienced in relationships in general, actually, that I can afford a few initial blunders -- not that I want to rely on this factor!


Thanks for your time,
The Amen Corner :nervous:

 

[navyseal2101]

Oh god no dont do that. Get her number by asking her, looking her up is creepy, and she may not want you to call, build a rapport first.

 

[The Amen Corner]

The whole 'she might not want me to call' thing hadn't really even cross my mind.

Now that I think about this.. I'm wondering.. isn't that supposed to be the right attitude to approach with?

Further more, is that a bad thing that I didn't see this perspective? Under what circumstances might a girl not want an acquaintance to call? And if she didn't, what would be the negative consequences of not respecting this impression?

Overall, I think you're right. It would be safer -- and smoother -- to move in to the realm of the telephone with the aid and backup of a stronger initial introduction -- but what I'm wondering is if it would fatal to bypass this step.

Some guys get numbers without really knowing the girls they talk to -- right? Other guys get numbers from friends, and are still granted dates after a phone convo, right? Or are these techniques that I shouldn't be attempting this early on?

 

[navyseal2101]

Well the reason she might not want you to call is she dosent rly know u. Also as you said before you are missing the practice ofgetting the number, which can be very rewaring especially if u havent done it many times before.