Use The Scientific Method to find YOUR girl.

[Alex DeLarge]

I'm not too sure how many people on here are in/went to college, but I'm a Biology major currently and we have been doing some review for a few classes and talking about the scientific method as well as distinguishing science from nonscience.

To begin, I would like to address that this is a method for finding a GIRLFRIEND. Not a Fvck buddy, not a ONS. Sure, it may not be DJ to want exclusivity with someone, but I'm sure the majority of the guys on here (including myself) would like to settle down with a WOMAN someday.. Not a wh0re, not a BPD, and not some man hating feminazi... Now, ONWARD!

You have to look at dating from a Post-Structural point of view. Meaning that you have to not look so much at the big picture (IE: the "All American Women are slvts, BPD, whatever.." talk on this board).. But focus more on the individual. The girl who you are gaming.

We all know that all women ARE NOT slvts or BPD. Yes, there are plenty out there but who cares? Let some sap pick them up and get used like most of us here did at some point!

Point of the matter is, all of this "game" talk with canned openers and the "essence of the alpha" is not really necessary. Yes it may work some of the time, especially in the bar scene.. But it does not mean the girl will be interested. All you need are the 3 C's as well as CONGRUENCY IN LEVEL OF ATTRACTION meaning that you don't say things like "I love you", do favors for her, buy her things (Other than maybe 1 drink or dinner on a date) after knowing the girl for 2 weeks... Save that for when you've been exclusive for a while, and even then.. Keep it to a minimum of holidays and birthdays.

1.) Charm
2.) Charisma
3.) Confidence

Now on with the second part of this post, The scientific method when choosing a girl.

If the girl fails at any stage of the scientific method, then move on to further discoveries. As long as you possess the 3 C's, it's not you.. It's her.

1.) OBSERVATION - You're walking down the street, and a girl catches your eye. So obviously, you stop and chat her up. Ask her a question, introduce yourself, anything really. Once you do this get the number.

2.) HYPOTHESIS - During this stage, it is key to build rapport with the girl. Sending a few texts or calling for a short conversation and ending with a scheduled date can't hurt. Avoid going out to dinner, a movie, or anything non casual or where conversation cannot be in its prime. Go for a walk in the park and learn about the girl. Pay attention to the girl's personality and body language. Is it what you like?... If so then your hypothesis has been met.

Hypothesis - This girl seems worth my time. Let's give it a shot!

3.) TEST - Now here is where you put her to the test. This girl seems great after the first date. The testing sequence will last until you or her are "official" whatever that may mean to you. You must be very observant of her in this stage, but not overly analytical or paranoid. Just see if she slips up anywhere that bothers you. to see if she is indeed what you want in a woman. Does she meet YOUR requirements for a girlfriend?

This stage is where most guys will wind up losing it or wind up uninterested. I've been there many times myself, all I can say is.. Hope for the best, expect the worst and have NO expectations unless she passes the test stage.. and always remember.. You have the rod. She's just another fish

4.) REFUTE - Has she passed the test stage or has she not? If she does not meet what you want in a girl, Next her. Don't bother being rude to her about it if she disagrees. Just let her simply know that she's not the one for you. If you want to stay friends with her, then stay friends. If not, then don't!

 

[Alex DeLarge]

5.) NEW HYPOTHESIS - The girl has made it this far. You two are together very frequently at this point you are both happy and depending on what you two want.. Probably seeing eachother exclusively (or not if the BOTH OF YOU do not want that.) She is pretty much your steady girlfriend it has probably been a month or two since you two first met. Remember... Congruency is key.

New Hypothesis - She is capable of being my girlfriend.

In this stage, the girl should be your NEW exclusive girlfriend. Wait to pop the question to her if you want to, but let's face it. Serious talk is BORING! Do it this way instead ...

If she starts acting like a girlfriend, a good way to establish this is by going out with some friends. Call them up and see what they're up to. If they say they're going out to a party and invite you, go with your girl. When you get to the party, introduce her as your girlfriend. Trust me.. If she made it this far she would love to hear you say that. Plus it shows you're so confident that you don't even need to have that talk before it's been established. She'll probably bring it up to you later on in person or over the phone and be thrilled. If she's not go back to the top and read what I wrote about the scientific method, if any stage is a failure, then she is not worthy of you as long as you possess the 3 C's and Congruence./I]

6.) SUPPORT - Bring the girl around your family and friends. See what they think of her, if your mother loves her she's probably a keeper, if your best girl friend thinks she's awesome for you, that's another good sign. Ask to meet her family and see how they are. If she has a good family she's most likely but not always a good person. She could be a good person too even if she has a bad family. Like I said before, each individual is different.. Not all girls without a father are fvcked in the head or slvtty. Not all guys without a father are weak spineless girly boys. Just remember to always treat her family members with respect and always respect their household.

Make sure when meeting her father (If she has one) to give a firm handshake (but don't try to crush his hand), maintain eye contact and give a confident hello. He will respect you a lot more than if you were to look down with your hands in your pockets with a wimpy wave and "hi".

If she does not like your friends and does not want you around them, then she is no good. The only reason why she would not want you around them is because they might seem like a bad influence. She should trust you enough to this point to not let people get in the way of your own moral decision making. If she does not, then you don't have a relationship.. You're just in a cage.

7.) RETEST - So your girl has made it this far. The retest stage should last a WHILE. By "last a while" I mean for the rest of your relationship until you figure she is WIFE material. Could be 1 year, could be 5 years. Let her stay over your place for extended periods of time (IE: a few days or a week, whatever. Not just sleep over, have sex, leave for whatever the both of you need to do the following day.) Is she a good guest? Does she clean up after herself? Does she prepare dinner or help with dinner? Does she help clean your place? If you can't live with her, then forget about it. You may be depressed that things have come so far if they go down the tubes now, but NEVER give up your backbone. Always maintain the frame of the relationship. Plus there's probably a better girl out there waiting for you if she can't pass this stage. Do not be arrogant and expect her to throw all of her obligations away for you though. That will get you nowhere fast.

This stage is what really determines whether it's actual love or not.. Sure you two may tell you that you love eachother before this, but you cannot truly love someone if they do not meet your expectations for a life partner. You must also BOTH be happy. Not just you, not just her. BOTH. If not, then don't bother continuing. The experiment is failed.

8.) SUPPORT - So you and your girl may be crashing at eachother's places all the time, or you may even be living together at this point. (Please no Tom Leykis reference toward this lol.) She's great, has surpassed all red flags and is everything you want in a woman. It's been a few years since you two met and you both have your lives together and well paying jobs. Now you're thinking of the whole engagement thing. Popping the big question. Well, THINK BEFORE ACTION. Talk to Mom and Pop or whatever immediate family/guardians you have. Talk to your friends too, but just remember BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER. Your friends may not always want the best for you, but what is the best for them. If your family thinks it's a great idea, then do it. If they have their doubts, question them on what they might be... If these doubts do not seem so logical and you made it this far, then negate their opinion for it is skewed or there is some kind of agenda behind the opinion.. Take it with a grain of salt (For example, forced marraiges in some cultures). If your girl says "Yes" move on to step 6. If she says no, she must have a logical explanation behind such thought. Give it some time, and if time does not prevail. The experiment is failed.

Most importantly, always trust yourself. Remember your 3 C's

9.) THEORY - This woman has been proven to be your wife. You are married. But just remember, the proof is that she IS your wife. Not that she will REMAIN your wife. As long as you continue to possess the 3 C's and Congruence. Things will remain.



** Now I know this isn't exactly DJ or PUA material, but I have noticed this site lacks a significant amount of material pertaining to keeping a relationship going past an FWB, ONS, or the number close. I know a lot of people on here are against marraige and against monogamous relationships, but there are plenty of people who lurk this site yearning to gain skills to benefit them in such areas for the future. I am not married, and I have never had a relationship last past a month. But it's all because I have lacked congruence, and lacked Composure of my 3 C's. As well as being well aware of the red flags I see.

I will say that my experience does not give this post credibility, but hypothetically speaking I believe this is the answer if anyone is to find their "one" in life. Why bother playing the game anymore after you found her?

 

[_E_]

As well meaning as this post may be, I don't think it's a good representation of a general scientific process.


Goal: discover general patterns that describe a wide range of phenomena (how, why, when, etc.).

Theoretically driven science: Begin with a theory, test validity and predicatability. Adapt theory to explain both old and new results or form a better theory that does the same.

Experimentally driven science: Begin with clear observations (data), search for general patterns that the data have in common.

 

[The Experience]

I doubt too many others are biology majors, so this isn't and won't be their cup of tea.

In my opinion, this is too much, and something like this formula can be generated from many other sciences. And really, who wants to apply a formula, when one is dating.

1) Find what you want in a girl
2) Ask girls out
3) Screen her to see if she has the qualities you want

 

[x86]

Is she a good guest? Does she clean up after herself? Does she prepare dinner or help with dinner? Does she help clean your place? If you can't live with her, then forget about it. You may be depressed that things have come so far if they go down the tubes now, but NEVER give up your backbone. Always maintain the frame of the relationship. Plus there's probably a better girl out there waiting for you if she can't pass this stage.

That line along makes this post top notch. Too many guys forget about those things.

 

[NewspaperRalph]

i'm in university. I'm also a biology major. And something about the "scientific method to find your girl" doesn't seem to ressonate with me.

Since you're a collage student, and you're in sciences, you might be interested in an experiment I'm doing.

I've created a place for collage/university students... It's similar to what you're doing, except of writing about it, I'm actually doing examples.

I usually have a bunch of girls to choose from, then out of that pile, I select only one to date... It's hard to describe how I do so - but I do document everything in detail.

The website's very new: 2.5 weeks old. So I really don't know if what I'm doing is good, or too cheesy, or too wierd. Read through one of my post and leave a comment. I need feedback!

http://leelincoln.com/blog/

The ultimate goal is to build a social training ground for collage/university student. That's the goal at least... check it out - everything is free BTW, I'm not selling anything.