"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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(urgent!) What to doooo??

ChalengeGuyFan

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There are two companies: A and B.

Company A: I've been at two interviews (a technical one and another with HR). Today I received their offer, which money-wise is a lot more than I asked for. :)
Great pay, I like the job, and the atmosphere there is great.



Company B: I've attended a technical interview where I've done brilliantly well (they actually told me that they liked it a lot); I'm waiting for the HR interview to happen (it is not yet scheduled).

I'd LOVE to work at B (much more than at A); they also have a reputation of offering salaries way above the average pay in this domain (but I would have asked for little money, having no experience whatsoever).
The atmosphere here is good.

But the job at B is not bagged! Ultimately, they may or may not want me.


A wants an answer. (not instantly, but I'd better give it soon)
I wish they took longer to respond.. :whistle:


Which is a good thing to do?


Edit: If B does call me, should I mention A's offer (not to give details, but to tell them that it exists) and put a little pressure for a fast answer on their part?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Rogue

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You can choose both. One thing which is common and is perfectly legitimate is to accept one job offer but then quit when the better offer comes along. You simply say "Hey, I need to quit. I got a better job offer" and perhaps try to finish out your schedule. This is one reason why employers have probationary periods.
 

Drdeee

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Better accept A, but if you do accept A know that it's better to work at least a year there, in other words you could quit spring next year. That's because I worked 2 weeks at A doesn't look good on your resume.

You could ask B to hurry up, and ask A to wait another week. But honestly, I'd go with A.

Job's a security thing. Having a job will not make you rich or in plenty, you'd just be average. Job + after work or during work activity that bring you money is what's needed, or your own business.
 

Rogue

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Drdeee said:
Better accept A, but if you do accept A know that it's better to work at least a year there, in other words you could quit spring next year. That's because I worked 2 weeks at A doesn't look good on your resume.
No, employers perfectly well understand job applicants often receive competing job offers, especially if the job applicant is really good. Probationary periods are setup so that employers and employees can get a feel for each other and part their separate ways without hard feelings if for whatever reason it's not a good match. In most cases, a job which lasts a short period of time probably does not need to be reported and, even if it was, a simple explanation of having received a better job offer would adequately suffice.

The only thing I would say is to ask the better job offer to delay the hire date so you can finish out your schedule.
 

ChalengeGuyFan

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SO I GOT HIRED! :)

Later that day I sent a message to company A asking for a draft of the future contact for analysis. That's the best I could come up with for a delay.

I also sent a message to B, telling them how I like the job, how I thought I'd fit me best and that I hoped they formed a good image about me after the first interview. I also said that, although I wish to work at B, given the uncertainty, I wouldn't want to pass on other offers, so I asked them to contact me as soon as they can.

Next Day:
Comp. A thought that I had accepted their offer, sent me a nice message, instructions etc. Damn! :)
Comp. B called me soon after and we set up an interview for Wednesday.

Wednesday:
As soon I woke up my mind started racing. What to do? What to do?
I thought about pluses and minuses for each of the companies (esp. the uncertainty of B), about the instructions A sent me (which would take ~2 days to complete, so I had to decide on the whole deal) and I talked to a couple a friends...

I ended up cancelling the interview with B and responding to A's email.
So I basically traded the uncertainty of a nicer job (but on a niche) for "the bird in the hand" with better prospects for future hiring.
The pay here is unexpectedly good.

B has a reputation of offering good salaries and I'm left curious about what might have been.

I must admit that I regret it a little. :)



Thoughts?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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U

user43770

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It sounds like you made the right decision. It would have sucked if you had held out for too long and not gotten either. The fact that job A makes you more hireable in the future is a definite plus, especially in this type of economy. Congrats.
 

Drdeee

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Now stick your d(i)ck deep inside that company and hold it by the legs with both hands. I don't know which field you're in, but it's already tough in the job market and it not gonna get easier anytime soon.

Remember, if you want out, wait till next year.

Oh and watch those hand shakes, a man tells everything about himself with a handshake.
 
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