"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Uranus pattern?

BobbDobbs

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I was listening to Ross Jefferies' BJ pattern (found it on kaazaaa) and that was pretty cool. A BJ pattern can draw on a lot of oral pleasures, so it is pretty easy to think of "put it in your mouth" examples and commands.

But here is a brain teaser -- what sort of ideas could you use to pattern for a little Uranus probe?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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oreo_renegade

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haha

the proper pronounciation of the word "Uranus" is like "U" "rin" "us"

not "Your" "Anus"


And the proper pronounciation sounds like its full of "urine," so making a pattern about things which sound like they are filled with piss isnt recomended.


:)
 

chalk

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"the proper pronounciation of the word "Uranus" is like "U" "rin" "us""

Depends if your American

you lot pronounce Aluminium "aloom in um"

How ****ed is that? :)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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chalk

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Well. In the Un-Americanized english language... ie... the original one, you'd pronounce it like TTBoy said but with Lum, instead of loo

A-lum-min-yum.

Im not sure why you lot changed it, but it provides me with great fun when i meet americans.
 

Walden

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You say potato I say kumara.
 

MVPlaya

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Originally posted by Jimbo2k
how else do you pronounce aluminum? :confused:
Al Lew Min Ee Yum

--------

I'm glad that instead of discussing the question in the post we are all discussing the proper pronunciation of uranus and aluminium. Keep up the good work, guys!
 
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vinstyle

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So did you clowns end up figuring out any patterns in uranus?
 

Sax God

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Okay, guys, pronunciations really depend on your particular dialect. That's really all there is to that.

As for the original question, how about "I heard they were sending a probe to Uranus, I sure hope it doesn't get caught in a black hole!"

However, if you know anything about black holes, you would know that it really makes no sense. It's just really kind of funny. :p
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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MVPlaya

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Re: haha

Originally posted by oreo_renegade
the proper pronounciation of the word "Uranus" is like "U" "rin" "us"

not "Your" "Anus"
:)
Hmm... so its not pronounced "your anus," just, "you're in us"
 

Satan Psycho

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The Backdoor Pleasures Pattern

Of course there's a pattern for that, Silly. How could there not be. :D

Did I ever tell you about my friend Rod? Well, he's a damn cool guy, but he got a new job. Yeah, he's on the R&D team of some furniture company, (make up a name, Muncher Furniture perhaps?). Yeah, well he's working on a team and their job is to design the perfect chair. Did you ever have a favorite chair? (of course she sez yes) What was it like? I have to ask this stuff, maybe I can give Rod some ideas. (let her talk about the perfect chair). Feed her info back to her in the following part: Yeah, I know what you mean. Isn't it great how you can have a favorite seat, and after a hard, stressful day at work, you LOOK FORWARD TO PLOPPING YOUR ASS/BUTT DOWN on that seat (point to schlong). And then you get there and you see that seat (point to schlong) and you can already start to RELAX and FEEL SO GOOD just thinking about how great it will feel when you LOWER YOUR ASS ONTO THAT SEAT (point to schlong!!!) and think how great it will be to slowly SLIDE DOWN ONTO IT (point to schlong!!!).

There's 2 more in the fornication materials over at
fastseduction. Never tried them myself because I've honestly never cared about that.
 

MVPlaya

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Originally posted by HollowHorizon
HI can i really just say something please.....

who gives a shlT????
Uranus does, sweety.
 

Austin Allegro

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Just start talking about astrology.

Tell her 'I've heard Pluto will be coming very close to Uranus this month...and according to Marianne Faithful's personal reading, Mars will be sucked into a black hole!'

See if that gets her hot! :D
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Walden

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No y'all need the
"Bend over so I can fit my John Thomas in your rectum pattern".

If you get to talking about the 13th century catholic rector John Thaddeus Thomas maybe it'll work.
 

prosemont

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Originally posted by Walden
No y'all need the
"Bend over so I can fit my John Thomas in your rectum pattern".

If you get to talking about the 13th century catholic rector John Thaddeus Thomas maybe it'll work.

ahahaha. Dude, you're too fvcking funny! ahahaha.
 
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