"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Unsure...

disfunktional

Don Juan
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Guys,

Split up with my ex about 6 months ago, we were together 7 years. I asked this woman out from work a couple of weeks back (one that I had been eyeing up for a long time), was nervous as hell but she said yes and we did lunch the following week. Since then we have been out for drinks one night (with others), then ended up in bed together that night ;) Been lots of kissing etc since then, things seem to be going well. She is away at the moment and messages me maybe a couple of times a day, saying she is missing me etc. I think I have been playing it quite well, always being ****y and joking, I think she is well into me. So where am I going with this? Well I am in to her too, she ticks most of my boxes. My concern is that I have not given myself enough time (if any) to become more confident in getting women. What do you reckon?

EDIT: This is the first woman I have dated since my ex by the way
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Ng-Ma

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well, the fact that you keep mentioning you Ex in the post tells me that you are still not over her. i say still give it more time man, or else you'll start associating the new girl with the EX, and will start making comparisons
 

disfunktional

Don Juan
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Hmmm, OK. Well, I guess I have made some comparisons in my mind, but they have all been positive. i.e she is a nicer person, more attractive, more of a similar mindset to me. She is an improvement over my ex in every way possible. Is this a bad thing?
 

Ng-Ma

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disfunktional said:
Hmmm, OK. Well, I guess I have made some comparisons in my mind, but they have all been positive. i.e she is a nicer person, more attractive, more of a similar mindset to me. She is an improvement over my ex in every way possible. Is this a bad thing?

i just hope that you arent using her as a gap filler. i mean, i hope you arent using her to get over your EX. if so, those feelings you have for her wont last long. make sure you arent doing this, if you arent, you're in the clear :rockon:
 

disfunktional

Don Juan
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I feel like I am over my ex. I met her a couple of weeks ago, and she was just the same, and she asked if there was any chance of us getting back together, I said no.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Ng-Ma

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disfunktional said:
I feel like I am over my ex. I met her a couple of weeks ago, and she was just the same, and she asked if there was any chance of us getting back together, I said no.
nice. go for it! good luck
 

disfunktional

Don Juan
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I think I now know that should things not work out with this girl and I become single again, although I have not had much experience, I have no doubt that I would get off my arse and go and ask women out.
 

disfunktional

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Shezz said:
This chick is all over you man, the question you have to ask yourself is what do you really want?

Good Luck

Sarge On...
I dunno man... Everything is up in the air at the moment, I start a new work position next week, moving out of my flat weekend after next to somewhere temporary whilst I try and buy a flat nearer work (currently live a long way away and commute). When I move down I will be much nearer her, but it will probably take a couple of months to find a place. All I know she is nice, I like her, I'd like to keep seeing her and doing things with her, and continue to get in her knickers ;)
 
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