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Unsure what to do? Breakup or down her to FB

brownjuan

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Me 32 and her 28 have been dating for about 6 months. I have little relationship experience beyond 6 months. I havent looked for a serious one in the past. Anyways i asked her to be my girl friend about 3 weeks ago because i liked her. I have had flings in the past but i kind of like to have a relationship so i can focus my energy on my startup than spending time chasing tail.

So a buddy of mine found out that she still has an active online dating profile. I asked her and she told me that she checks it for funny messages. I didn't buy it but told her if she wants to date other people i should be able to date others. She said that she isnt interested in others and we left it there. With my past experience i dont trust a word that woman say to men.

Long story she is back active on her profile almost every day. I kind of figured out that she isnt really into the relationship. That is the take away - correct me if iam wrong or am i reading too much into it.

I still want to bang her but i dont know how to open the relationship from her being my girl friend to a FB. I want to demote her but i dont want to hide anything from her. Any advise is appreciated
 
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Fireballs

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6 months in and she still hadn't asked you to become exclusive? That's some low interest right there.

Never ever ask a girl to become exclusive, that's her job. She is only keeping you around until someone better comes along.

It may seem extreme but I would just go ghost on her. No explanation, nothing. Just vanish.
 

brownjuan

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well i asked her to be exclusive and she said yes. i don't have a lot of relationship experience so i kind of expected the guy in the relationship to take decision about exclusivity.

Now iam kind of stuck that i asked her to be in a relationship while she is checking her profile online. Could you be checking the profile due to insecurities or iam giving her too much credit.

She had told me before that in her only relationship she rushed in after the guy asked her to be exclusive and she regretted it. Its puzzling to me because i have to deal with uncertainity.

I was thinking about creating an online dating profile and message her to see if she would respond. if she responds , it would clear out a lot of things from my mind. i can straight away demote her while looking for another woman.
 

brownjuan

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set a boundary about online dating profiles, among other things.
She said that if it bothers me about her having a profile she would delete it. I told her that she shouldn't be doing it because i asked her to delete the profile. She should do it because she wants to delete the profile. I didn't want to argue with her so i let it go there.

Now she is on vacation with her parents but she is checking her online profile almost every day. Iam very skeptical that she is checking for funny messages.
 

Fireballs

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well i asked her to be exclusive and she said yes. i don't have a lot of relationship experience so i kind of expected the guy in the relationship to take decision about exclusivity
If a girl hasn't asked you about exclusivity it means she's keeping her options open and has her doubts about you.

If you ask her first, you will never know her true interest level.

I also like the analogy of the guy asking being akin to a bird flying into a cage. There must be something wrong with it right? You should be free as a bird while the girl tries to bring you into the cage not the other way around.
 

brownjuan

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My wife loves watching that show catfish on mtv, why let some fellow member contact her and see what are her intention on the online dating site.
I meant creating a fake profile , not asking another guy contact her
 

Serenity

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Well, it's really simple, you don't trust her. What is a relationship without trust? Let's say for arguments sake she was truthful about just having it for the funny messages. What then are the consequences of not believing it? It's not going to work, your mistrust might also make her more drawn to online dating as well, they can sense it you know.

You probably can't demote her to FB, especially if she actually does want just you. In that case doing so will break her heart, if she however isn't interested in you then why would she want to fvck you anyways?

You have two choices, keep her or dump her entirely.
 

Afrei

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The first error you made is to ask for serious commitment, that her job not yours. Also in my opinion it is disrespectful toward you that she kept the online profile and check it in a regular basis for "funny comment" in other words male attention. That in itself is a problem and would raise major red flags in me and I'm sure it has on you, hence the reason you are here. If I were you I wouldn't mention the online thing anymore but I would be on my guard to see if she continues checking it on a regular basis ,if she does then u have a problem. If you want to demote her to fb don't officially break up with her just sit her down I tell her you need some time and the reason for it.. Ghost her and wait for her to seek you out. if she doesn't then she really wasn't into u, if she does use her as fb..however if you have develop feeling for her I suggest you bail out ...good luck
 

pyros

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1 she didnt ask you to be her bf in SIX MONTHS.
2 she has a profile in a dating site.

ar you dumb???

either send he to the curb or keep he as a fwb, but do not even consider her for a LTR, because she clearly doesnt want to be your gf, lmao...
 

Lozboss

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NUKE her from orbit. Full Ghost NC and block her on everything.

No chat, no explanation.

You're a backup and shes still online because shes exercising Hypergamy.

She didn't ask you to be exclusive? Bin her. You NEVER ask a girl to be exclusive.
 

brownjuan

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Bamn i got the answer i needed. I creating an online dating profile of a reasonable attractive and accompolished guy. bam she replied with a bunch of blah blah blsh and i quote " i really like your profile ".

How do i screw with this biaaatch ? I want to keep banging her
 

dustmuffin

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Just dump her and get over it.
Bamn i got the answer i needed. I creating an online dating profile of a reasonable attractive and accompolished guy. bam she replied with a bunch of blah blah blsh and i quote " i really like your profile ".

How do i screw with this biaaatch ? I want to keep banging her
 

Serenity

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Bamn i got the answer i needed. I creating an online dating profile of a reasonable attractive and accompolished guy. bam she replied with a bunch of blah blah blsh and i quote " i really like your profile ".

How do i screw with this biaaatch ? I want to keep banging her
She doesn't deserve your d!ck, dump her and find a woman who does.
 

Lozboss

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How do i screw with this biaaatch ? I want to keep banging her
You don't. You don't have a strong enough frame to do so.

So nuke her and move on.

/thread closed
 

CuddleJunkie

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You don't. You don't have a strong enough frame to do so.

So nuke her and move on.

/thread closed
This brownjuan, seriously. Stop thinking with your **** when you get disrespected. You can continue on ****ing the biatch, but you will hate yourself for doing it after being disrespected.
 

macallik

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Thanks guys. I will dump her tonight when i meet her
Cool.

For future relationships, you should work on being more secure and understanding what you want. If you are only in the relationship because you want to focus on your startup, then you need to be ok with the idea of her having an active profile. IMO you would be ok with a few main plates and calling it a day.

Setting up a profile and messaging her is creepy as sh!t imo. If you just want to be FB, then tell her you just be a FB. Don't do this stalker stuff.
 

brownjuan

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Cool.

For future relationships, you should work on being more secure and understanding what you want. If you are only in the relationship because you want to focus on your startup, then you need to be ok with the idea of her having an active profile. IMO you would be ok with a few main plates and calling it a day.

Setting up a profile and messaging her is creepy as sh!t imo. If you just want to be FB, then tell her you just be a FB. Don't do this stalker stuff.

Thank man. I don't have a ton of experience with women and i couldn't make a decision without knowing that she was really untrustworthy.

I know its creepy **** to email her but that was the only way to figure out for sure that i need to get rid of her
 

Reykhel

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Not a bad idea. I would dump though not demote. Also, online dating can permanently corrupt a woman because it's simply too much overstimulation and ego boosting for them to cope with
Yes, yes, yes. Agree with that.

It changes her mentality. Corrupts is the perfect verb here.

6 months with her and the cvnt still has an online account? That's fvcking disrespect right there.

You've made the right decision. Pull the plug on this dopey cvnt.

You can do better.
 
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