"Unsexy Thoughts"

[Alkali]

You know the situation(s).

-You're grinding a girl and you let your hand slip up her leg.

-She's sitting on your lap whispering in to your ear (in a sexy breathless tone)

-You're laying down rolling around (horse play)

Basically, these are just a few of the million situations where you should not be getting ahead of yourself (in the pants.) So to the point, how do you keep it under control? I start off by keeping my mind preoccupied and spelling/saying junk backwards.

If that fails I start thinking of Fat Bastard (from Austin Powers) having sex with Rosie O' Donnel. Depending on how I feel, this could backfire...

Finally, I stick to baseball and furniture. Yet this still fails me. I need tips on this subject lol, the Highschool Forum was no help at all. Before tomorrow would be beneficial.

 

[TonyWongButOhSoRite]

Think of you're granny and mother going at it while you're fathers wearing a bikini singing showtunes. I hear thats good.

 

[Alkali]

Wow, my penis just fell off...I need more matierial like that!

 

[sexybeast]

Keep it under control? Keep your mind preoccupied and spelling junk backwards? Are you kidding me?

The only time you should think up this kind of stuff is when your pounding the life out of her, to stop yourself from squirting your load to quickly.

If a girl is turning you on (Especially when she's isolated in a bedroom with you ect) dont fight it let it grow and do its natural thing... let her know about it aswel... that kinda sh1t turns a girl ON! Trust me mate.

 

[Alkali]

Thanks, but there are times when having some self control could be beneficial.

For the purposes ahead lets just assume it is to keep from blowing my wad.

I need more horrifying thoughts!

 

[Heretic]

Thanks, but there are times when having some self control could be beneficial.

For the purposes ahead lets just assume it is to keep from blowing my wad.

I need more horrifying thoughts!

Look through car accident and suicide photos. Not only is it at times interesting, it can be the quickest way to lose it.

It's also kind of disturbing, and if you're not going to medical school or somehow already exposed to that kind of stuff, i don't recommend it.

 

[Bvbidd]

Just tell em you got a boner, they love that stuff. Belive me. The girl's face will light up with joy. I'm not being sarcastic.

 

[Alkali]

Just tell em you got a boner, they love that stuff. Belive me. The girl's face will light up with joy. I'm not being sarcastic.

I don't always know them that well lol.

I may be a little cautious, but I'm generally pretty accurate when sizing a person up.

 

[Ace of Flames]

This seems stupid. Maybe its just me, but when my girl and I are messing around or making out, this is never a problem. Half-mast is about the most I get, and I think she wishes I got more. Once we start getting to the main events, things just take care of themselves.

A lot of the ideas you guys are coming up with are sick and wrong. If I'm getting busy with a beautiful girl, I don't wanna be thinking about death and destruction, or ugly/old people/family members going at it. I wanna be with her!

Instead of all these disgusting thoughts, or even the ones like baseball or counting numbers, why not just focus on her? Think about all the ways you can make her cvm. Listen to her moans, feel her body moving, do what you know will make her feel amazing. Before you know it, it'll be an hour later, and then you're both ready to wrap it up. Happy day!

 

[Bvbidd]

Well I'm assuming this girl isn't some stranger on the street and you guys at least know each other. If your popping one the second you see a random girl, mabye ya should jack off more. lol

 

[MooseGod]

When in doubt, whip it out. :crackup:

 

[Serialized3]

Jesus christ you guys are such a bunch of virgins. (channeling Real here)

Most girls want to feel your boner pressed up against them. Believe this.

 

[mintxx]

i second ace of flames. jeez i wish i had this problem. I'm seeing this smoking hot girl with the sweetest body and a gorgeous face and i'm so over sex in general that she barely registers on the mint richter scale. argh.

 

[unnamed04]

I usually only get about half-mast when making out also.

I was out on a second date with a girl today (second date in 2 days, but who cares about the rules) and we were walking along and as she brushed up next to me, the way she held onto my bicep put the sexiest thoughts into my head I got an insta-semi right there. I didn't give a **** really I had a bit of a chuckle and moved on.

Sorry but thinking about my grandma ****ing my mum is pretty much the last thing I want to think about ever.

The boner is your sexual energy. Let her feel it. Hey it feels good rubbing it on things, might aswell be a HB you're gonna bang one day (perhaps today)

 

[LAWYER]

You know the situation(s).

-You're grinding a girl and you let your hand slip up her leg.

-She's sitting on your lap whispering in to your ear (in a sexy breathless tone)

-You're laying down rolling around (horse play)

Basically, these are just a few of the million situations where you should not be getting ahead of yourself (in the pants.) So to the point, how do you keep it under control? I start off by keeping my mind preoccupied and spelling/saying junk backwards.

If that fails I start thinking of Fat Bastard (from Austin Powers) having sex with Rosie O' Donnel. Depending on how I feel, this could backfire...

Finally, I stick to baseball and furniture. Yet this still fails me. I need tips on this subject lol, the Highschool Forum was no help at all. Before tomorrow would be beneficial.

You need total coolness at all times... Before you do anything or talk to a her just ask your self is this cool... if your answer is no then just dont do it... its that simple... If your answer is yes then just do it.:kick: