Unmasculine car?

[DJinTraining06]

I have a year old car, a silver 2008 nissan versa sedan. Recently ive had to go for classes for my job with fellow coworkers and every day we take turns driving somewhere for lunch. Well it was my turn a couple weeks ago and 1 of the guys says they were surprised id buy that car new considering im a young guy. He thought i woulda had something like mustang or a cooler car being that im only 28 and single (meanwhile he drives a tiny honda civic like thats so much better) So then another coworker chimed in and started making fun of it and saying "hey why didnt u buy a ford taurus, and before u knew it, it was brought to everyones attention and he got a laught out of everyone. I tried to just laught it off figuring yea its not a very manly car so watever i can take a joke. But then he keeps goin on and on all day makign cracks about it and i could not figure out a way to stop him without making him think he riled me. I told him hey as long as it gets me where i gotta go and its cheap and allows me to save money for a house someday so i can stop renting then its fine by me. I also defended it saying i like the interior cuz it has alot of room for a compact car which it does.

Now a couple weeks pass buy and its my turn to drive again and the guy who made the taurus comment says hey, its really roomy back here and keeps saying it smirking at the other guy next to him. Then on thew way back from lunch he says "hey do u get laid in this car?" he thinks its so funny and one of the other guys is laughing. One other guy who's a good dude is silent the whole time, but the other two act as if im driving some pink car or something. Theres really no way for me to win in that situation.

Is it just me or is that really pathetic to make fun of a guys ride. I totaled my last car and was in a bad accident and wanted something affordable and i think its nice for a compact car. I have a girlfriend who im giving a ring to, so im not trying to impress chicks, so arent i more of a man for not being insecure and needding to have an suv or a mustang that i dont need? Is there anythign i can say to these guys to shut them the hell up? cuz nothign seems to work and i frankly want to punch them in the face. Theyre both well liked guys so how can i win, what can i say or do to let them know that is not acceptable.

 

[Desdinova]

If I were you, I'd tell him that he can fvcking walk. It's your car, and you can decide who you drive. There's no reason to do favors for people who are disrespectful.

On another note, here's a pic of the car a guy at my old workplace drove:
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i306/Desdinovastar/Flowercar.jpg

 

[DJinTraining06]

If I were you, I'd tell him that he can fvcking walk. It's your car, and you can decide who you drive. There's no reason to do favors for people who are disrespectful.

On another note, here's a pic of the car a guy at my old workplace drove:
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i306/Desdinovastar/Flowercar.jpg

wow now that is pretty bad. mine isnt bad at all in my opinion. the versa is just a cheap sedan. Its silver and i didn't do anythign feminine to it. i didnt get the hatchback which is pretty ugly, but the sedan i guess is a lil box like. Not like the pt cruiser or prius but slighly box-ish. I actually really like it as far as a low end car goes. I would have preffered a maxima but i dint want the expense i wanna save for a house. How pathetic has the male culture become that a 28 yr old driving a lower end silver sedan gets made fun of like crazy for it. it boggles my mind. In europe where men are men they drive tiny little subcompact cars. This hummer driving suv culture is infantile and sad.

and your right im too fvcking nice, i shoulda made those 2 walk. But my thinking on that was then i look like a little crybaby and they'll know they riled me and then theyll go tell everyone and ill lose respect. I always seem to have a problem deciding when to take a joke and when to stick up for myself. its a fine line and i never seem to know when that line has been crossed. Should i just tell them to shut the f up next time or is that being a crybaby? im not that witty nothing i come back with seems to make anyone laugh,yet that one guys idiiotic comments like "do i get laid in that care" are such a hit. I almost feel like i shoulda just bought the maxima or somethin reasonably high end just cuz appearances are everything. Im learning that more and more. I was totally secure with my car, i knew it wasnt a muscle car, or a big car, or a powerful car, but it fulfiled my needs at this time and here i get abused about my car for no good reason.

 

[ENIGMA16]

and your right im too fvcking nice, i shoulda made those 2 walk. But my thinking on that was then i look like a little crybaby and they'll know they riled me and then theyll go tell everyone and ill lose respect.

You don't have to act like a crybaby to say it just be like "If you guys hate my car so much then I'll do you a favor and won't let you ride in it" while smirking the whole time.

 

[DJinTraining06]

You don't have to act like a crybaby to say it just be like "If you guys hate my car so much then I'll do you a favor and won't let you ride in it" while smirking the whole time.

Yea they woulda still kept on goin with it tho cuz thats how they are. its almost like maybe i let them give it too much attention. Maybe if i didnt laugh it off the first time and just ignored them theyd have stop its like i fuled there fire by payin attention.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I grew up with a long line of $300 cars - old 70's sedans that were all my parents could afford. Some of them had holes in the floor where you could see the road going by beneath you, other were wrecked and only had one or two working doors, sometimes one or two doors would be a different color. These days, it is really hard for me to be embarrassed about what I drive. I have one car that is sporty and nice, but most of the time I drive an old import truck that has about 1.7 million miles on it.

It is much easier to genuinely stop caring what people think than it is to try and impress people.

 

[DJinTraining06]

I grew up with a long line of $300 cars - old 70's sedans that were all my parents could afford. Some of them had holes in the floor where you could see the road going by beneath you, other were wrecked and only had one or two working doors, sometimes one or two doors would be a different color. These days, it is really hard for me to be embarrassed about what I drive. I have one car that is sporty and nice, but most of the time I drive an old import truck that has about 1.7 million miles on it.

It is much easier to genuinely stop caring what people think than it is to try and impress people.

,,,

 

[DJinTraining06]

I grew up with a long line of $300 cars - old 70's sedans that were all my parents could afford. Some of them had holes in the floor where you could see the road going by beneath you, other were wrecked and only had one or two working doors, sometimes one or two doors would be a different color. These days, it is really hard for me to be embarrassed about what I drive. I have one car that is sporty and nice, but most of the time I drive an old import truck that has about 1.7 million miles on it.

It is much easier to genuinely stop caring what people think than it is to try and impress people.

i def see ur point man. It really is alot easier to just not care anymore. But my fear with that is I won't have many friends in life. Besides the friends i have right now which is really just a few good friends and a couple of once in a while friends, im afraid if i take that attitude ill end up alone. I mean i have my gf who im prob gonna marry and ill have a family im sure but i dont wanna be one of those miserable family guys that has no dude friends anymore. Its always been a debate in my head - to conform or to not care what others think. I feel like the latter only works if there's soemthing special about you. Like if your a great athlete, musician, really good looking, tall, wealthy, funny, etc. I'm none of those things. Im 5'6'', average looking, not funny even when i try, not wealthy, not gifted in any way that people care about, so its hard for someone like me to not care what others think because i naturally dont get that much respect with people even before they know me very well. Its easy for say lebron james or billy joel to not care what people think, cuz theyre loved and admired. Could it be that maybe if i follow your advice, the opposite would occur and maybe i get more respect and make tons of friends along the way? I think im gonna follow your advice regarless tho cuz when i care bout wat a$$holes liek those 2 guys think, i get so pissed off and i hate that they can alter my mood like that. I dont even like them, why does it bother me? but if I dont care what they think wont i also be a pvssy for not defending myself and telling them to shut the f up? Altho if i care bout that then i guess its still caring what people think. lol

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

I grew up with a long line of $300 cars - old 70's sedans that were all my parents could afford. Some of them had holes in the floor where you could see the road going by beneath you, other were wrecked and only had one or two working doors, sometimes one or two doors would be a different color. These days, it is really hard for me to be embarrassed about what I drive. I have one car that is sporty and nice, but most of the time I drive an old import truck that has about 1.7 million miles on it.

It is much easier to genuinely stop caring what people think than it is to try and impress people.

This must be a midwestern thing, we had this old car we kept on our hog farm that you practically had to put your feet on the dash to avoid dragging on the ground. We used it to haul piglets around and pick up field rocks, it was the only vehicle we were allowed to drive when we were kids. We would have to have a guy in the backseat to make sure the pigs didn't fall out:crackup:

And don't get me started on our old grain truck...a teenager thinks it's all rock n roll hoochie coo when he gets his license, but I spent my fall afternoons sitting on a bucket for a seat, getting smoked out by that old Detroit diesel, and cussing my old man.

To the OP, let em walk next time. Who are these douchebags to talk sh!t about your car? I suppose they all drive Corvette Z06s?

 

[Bible_Belt]

I drove a farm truck for a while in high school. It was a 70's Dodge with a manual 'three on the tree' transmission. The brakes once went out suddenly and I crashed it into a big pile of mulch, Dukes of Hazzard style.

i def see ur point man. It really is alot easier to just not care anymore. But my fear with that is I won't have many friends in life. Besides the friends i have right now which is really just a few good friends and a couple of once in a while friends, im afraid if i take that attitude ill end up alone. I mean i have my gf who im prob gonna marry and ill have a family im sure but i dont wanna be one of those miserable family guys that has no dude friends anymore. Its always been a debate in my head - to conform or to not care what others think. I feel like the latter only works if there's soemthing special about you. Like if your a great athlete, musician, really good looking, tall, wealthy, funny, etc. I'm none of those things. Im 5'6'', average looking, not funny even when i try, not wealthy, not gifted in any way that people care about, so its hard for someone like me to not care what others think because i naturally dont get that much respect with people even before they know me very well. Its easy for say lebron james or billy joel to not care what people think, cuz theyre loved and admired. Could it be that maybe if i follow your advice, the opposite would occur and maybe i get more respect and make tons of friends along the way? I think im gonna follow your advice regarless tho cuz when i care bout wat a$$holes liek those 2 guys think, i get so pissed off and i hate that they can alter my mood like that. I dont even like them, why does it bother me? but if I dont care what they think wont i also be a pvssy for not defending myself and telling them to shut the f up? Altho if i care bout that then i guess its still caring what people think. lol

Your problem is your self-image. That is why your coworker gets to you. fwiw, his self-image is pretty sh!tty if he is making fun of your car; he's probably a lot worse off emotionally than you are.

And friendships are built around shared interests. It is not that people with a lot of friends are somehow great people, they just go out and do a lot of stuff. The miserable family guys never get out of the house. Pursue a hobby or interest, then you will run into people with the same interest, and those people will become your friends...or at least the ones who don't make fun of your car.

 

[DJinTraining06]

This must be a midwestern thing, we had this old car we kept on our hog farm that you practically had to put your feet on the dash to avoid dragging on the ground. We used it to haul piglets around and pick up field rocks, it was the only vehicle we were allowed to drive when we were kids. We would have to have a guy in the backseat to make sure the pigs didn't fall out:crackup:

And don't get me started on our old grain truck...a teenager thinks it's all rock n roll hoochie coo when he gets his license, but I spent my fall afternoons sitting on a bucket for a seat, getting smoked out by that old Detroit diesel, and cussing my old man.

To the OP, let em walk next time. Who are these douchebags to talk sh!t about your car? I suppose they all drive Corvette Z06s?

Well the one guy who made the most comments drives a huge suv. I dont know when having an suv as a single guy became cool but it apparently is now.

 

[DJinTraining06]

Well went back to classes with the guys from work again today and today the main culprit started right away making cracks aboiut my car and he and another guy start lauhging like hyenas nonstop making crack after crack after crack about the versa. eventually everyone starts lauighing hystericlaly cuz of course people r followers thats always what happens. so i laugh it off i show that i can laugh about myself thinking hey theyll think im cool and can laugh at myself. But no i wasnt allowed to chime in and laugh it off anythign i said was turned into another joke and another joke. it never ended. it became kinda like the runnign joke now. Well i can deal with that but they took it eway to far. The guy at one point said girls like small girls and something bout me being a midget and then it got to the point that i couldnt even speak without a versda joke comign out of it. Now that is a serioous line crossed am i right? I finally say alright thats enough give it a fvcking rest and then he starts cracking up saying that its so funny how riled up i get.

Which is amazing considering i laughed it off or ignored every comment he made since yesterday. Now how can i win in a situation like that. at this point i decided to start defending myself and trying to stick it back to him and none of my jokes worked. i heard cricketsd and he just got more fuel out of it. Is punching him in the face gthe only way to stop a guy like this? Imbegininig to think it is. but then ill lose my job. so its a lose lose and i have to look like a loser and feel like a loser no matter what.

Any advice? i am steaming right now

 

[FairShake]

Is it just me or is that really pathetic to make fun of a guys ride?

I think it's more pathetic to get riled over people making fun of you for the car you drive.

I know I sound like an *******, but the advice is sound too. There are plenty of things that are out of line for people to break your balls for. But the car you drive is not one of them. It's a very unimportant part of who you are and something that you shouldn't put too much stock in. Personally I would be more angry if they made fun of important things that are deeper.

Pick your battles.

 

[FairShake]

Just read the second post...

If you're not joining in and they keep it up it IS aimed at you and not your car.

F!ck them, they can walk.

 

[DJinTraining06]

Just read the second post...

If you're not joining in and they keep it up it IS aimed at you and not your car.

F!ck them, they can walk.

i started ignoring it and just pretending it didnt phase me. I didnt look sad, i just looked normal and still talked and asked questions in class and had a smile on my face during lunch. i tried to look to totally unfazed. and yes they continued even harder. now if i knock this guy in the head i lose my job. I do nothing and hell keep disprespecting me. I try to dish it back to him and he and the other hyena laugh hysterically that im getting defensive.
Ive tried all of these except punching him in the face. they didnt work. so what should i do? I feel humililiated and belittled and its a lose lose cuz theres no way to stop him, without lsoing my job. If i just talk to him and tell him he better f'in stop he will just tell everyone right after and theyll all be laughing and doing it even harder. wat r my options?
I was telling my best friend about it over a beer before and he kept tellin me not to let it bother me. So im like wat r u saying a man shoiuldnt stick up for himself? and hes like no im not sayin that im saying just dont let it bother u. so im like well i tried laughing it off and then when he kept goin i tried dishing it back till i got really riled and told him to give it a f'in rest. to which he just laughed hysterically looking at the guy next to him. my friend had no response to that, he just said you shoudlnt let it bother u.

So basically he is saying i should just sit there and take it. I basiucally have to have 6 other guys at work think im pathetic and think they can make fun of me anytime they want. if anybody has any advice on how to deal with this please let me know cuz i am enraged at this douche bag and i dont wanna lose my cool and do somethin stupid like punch him and lose my job.

 

[DJinTraining06]

I think it's more pathetic to get riled over people making fun of you for the car you drive.

I know I sound like an *******, but the advice is sound too. There are plenty of things that are out of line for people to break your balls for. But the car you drive is not one of them. It's a very unimportant part of who you are and something that you shouldn't put too much stock in. Personally I would be more angry if they made fun of important things that are deeper.

Pick your battles.

Well i agree with u but if u were there youd understand. It was continuous and the fact they he wouldnt stop is disrespectful to me as a person andn shows me he has no respect for me as a person which is fine, he can feel however he wants, but when he makes me look bad in front of everyone else and gets everyone esle laughing at my expense every single f'in day, how is that not personal? he doesnt let me join in and laugh at myself. Whatever i say he makes a new joke about it. How can u say thats not personal towards me ?

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

The next time you hear a joke about your car,

You: "That's what I've been meaning to talk to you guys about. My car's in a real bad way. I know you guys were messin around, but the car just doesn't get it. Of course, if you go out to the parking lot and apologize to him, it might smooth things over."

Him/Them: Huh? Wtf? Laughter, something to that extent

This is where you change the tone and put your mean face on.

You: "I don't think it's nice, you laughin'. My car hates people laughin'. He gets the crazy idea they're laughing at him. Now when you go apologize, like I know you're going to, I might be able to convince him that you didn't mean it."

This is where you communicate in no uncertain terms that you have had enough and you must be ready to hit someone in the face. Make no mistake, they have escalated with this because, like children, they figured out they could get away with it. You failed to give them a reason to stop. It's alot harder to punish disrespect once it's out in the open rather than putting it down brutally when you first detect it.

 

[DJinTraining06]

The next time you hear a joke about your car,

You: "That's what I've been meaning to talk to you guys about. My car's in a real bad way. I know you guys were messin around, but the car just doesn't get it. Of course, if you go out to the parking lot and apologize to him, it might smooth things over."

Him/Them: Huh? Wtf? Laughter, something to that extent

This is where you change the tone and put your mean face on.

You: "I don't think it's nice, you laughin'. My car hates people laughin'. He gets the crazy idea they're laughing at him. Now when you go apologize, like I know you're going to, I might be able to convince him that you didn't mean it."

This is where you communicate in no uncertain terms that you have had enough and you must be ready to hit someone in the face. Make no mistake, they have escalated with this because, like children, they figured out they could get away with it. You failed to give them a reason to stop. It's alot harder to punish disrespect once it's out in the open rather than putting it down brutally when you first detect it.

yea your def right about that, its a hell of a lot harder to stop once its out in the open. i tried the funny thing like u suggested and i dont get laughs. guys that disrespect you dont laugh at ur jokes. So basically with me it would just skip right to the second part which is showingn that im ready to hit someone in the face. when that happens i get laughed at even more till i back it up punch the guy in the face and lose my job. so its a lose lose situation. i dont like to feel sorry for myself, in fact i usually bounce back from things and try and use them as growing experiences, my parents almways taught me not to feel sorry for myself, but i gotta say im really at a loss here, what am i supposed to do?

 

[Paintballguy]

i'd tell them to go f themselves and walk. if i hitch a ride with someone at work to lunch, i dont give a flying fvck what they drive. im just happy to not have to drive. i'll even volunteer for the ****tiest seat.

i used to drive a old beat up 94 toyota pickup, and i didnt care what people thought. it was paid off and got great gas milage. and on top of that i had no problem banging hb's. people who are concerned what type of car they drive have underlying issues and they try to compensate with a fancy car.

 

[DJinTraining06]

i'd tell them to go f themselves and walk. if i hitch a ride with someone at work to lunch, i dont give a flying fvck what they drive. im just happy to not have to drive. i'll even volunteer for the ****tiest seat.

i used to drive a old beat up 94 toyota pickup, and i didnt care what people thought. it was paid off and got great gas milage. and on top of that i had no problem banging hb's. people who are concerned what type of car they drive have underlying issues and they try to compensate with a fancy car.

yea doesnt make me feel any better, im 28 and have a bully as if i was in grade school. The amazing thing is that people think hes funny even after the 300th versa joke.