"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Two kind of women: insecure and secure

jhonny9546

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We know there are two kinds of women: secure and insecure. What do these women seek or crave in their lives? For example, an insecure woman craves validation from a specific person. But what if I told you that if you validate her, she may lose attraction to you? This is a contradiction. When considering a LTR, how do you give a woman what she craves without overdoing it?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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The Duke

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I've met a few females that came across as secure, but often you will find insecurity underneath it all. I don't know a woman out there that doesn't seek validation in some form. Women are the greatest natural actors you will ever meet. The most secure woman will never be as secure as the most secure man. A person that lives its life around her beauty will never achieve the level of security of a person that lives his life based on his accomplishments.

You give her what she craves in moderation. You use push/pull tactics. Give her attention, then pull away and go do your thing. For a woman to "love" you, she must miss you. If she isn't telling you she misses you and wondering what you are up to from time to time, you are giving her too much attention. You always need to keep the carrot dangling on the stick.
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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Keeping women attracted and attached to you is long-term game.

Like said above, you have to dangle the carrot and keep them literally addicted and stimulated to you through deep conversion sex, mental manipulation and slight fear of abandonment. Harsh but battle tested.

Women are like jello: the tighter you try to hold onto them, the more they slip through your fingers.
 

jhonny9546

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Like said above, you have to dangle the carrot and keep them literally addicted and stimulated to you through deep conversion sex, mental manipulation and slight fear of abandonment. Harsh but battle tested.
Is this what a masculine, high-value man should do in his life?
This seems like a lot of work, and it doesn't appear to foster a "genuine" connection with someone who is attracted to you.
You're working to keep her attracted to you, rather than focusing on improving yourself so that she is attracted to a high-value man. Is this correct, or should you do it anyway?
This doesn't mean that I can't see this happening in real life. I have more than two or three real-life examples of the type of relationship you mentioned. One observation I've made is that these men are often manipulative by nature, which is how they attract women
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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jhonny9546

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Discuss boundaries from the start. State clearly what you require and what you work towards in the relationship. Show your integrity and demand the same. Don't allow anyone to cross your boundaries without consequences.

If you're unsure how to go about that, think about the consent discussions in **** circles, where you agree on what you will do with each other, hard limits you might have (I distrust people who have no hard limits), and safe words. You can apply that more or less in your private relationship conversations. This is not necessarily about sex / kink, but about how you treat each other with respect and dignity so that you can trust each other not to cross each other's boundaries.
Ok nice, like a "verbal" contract.
What do you guys usually state in your "boundaries" for a LTR?
 
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