"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Turning the tables.

So pimp its scary

Master Don Juan
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This is one of the few times where I actually have a question for the group. I'm more just searching for advice on how to turn the tables of this situation for my advantage.

I moved to Calgary recently for a job opportunity (good thing there are lots of these in this city) with a former coworker from Winnipeg. The day we drove out was the day that I met the person who was letting us use her car for the cause.

The plan was that she drive us here and drive herself home. It turned out that she wanted to stay afterall, and was living with us in our arrangements.

She was 'involved' (for lack of a better term) with the guy that came with me. He ended up treating her like ****, and just caused drama for the lot of us and has since left on his own.

Now, me and the girl have been friends from the day we met, I was always my usual flirty self with her, and continue to do all the right things that would maintain her interest.

The only problem is that I'm not sure how I should go about letting her know of my 'intentions'. So far, the both of us sometimes go out to party and meet new people. Just to say that she knows that I can handle my own, that is why I believe that she doesn't realize my interest in her.

I've been debating a way that I could go in for the kiss, because that is the one thing that would get me further with this girl. (Keep in mind that we do hang out almost continuously, we have other friends, but for the most part when we are not working we are together)

I've only recently started to drop subtle hints that I might possibly be attracted to her, and the kino levels between us have been starting to escalate... But still, I'm not sure if she even thinks of me as a possibility, I very well might be too deep in friendzone. But to me it is worth the risk.

Last thing, now that we are mostly established in the new city, we've decided to move in together for July.... just to get out of the hair of the person who was nice enough to give us a place to sleep for the past 2 months.

Here are the situations that I've considered to get the ball rolling:

a) While we are having a close conversation to simply lean in for the kiss.

b) Tell her how I appreciate alot of the things she's done to help me to the point that I just wanted to give her a kiss. Then, lean in for one.

c) Wait for an argument, or start one myself. Then in the intensity, just grab her and pull her in for the kiss.

d) Wait untill we are moved in together, because then even if she rejects that I won't be f*cking myself over for a roommate.

e) Next time I see her just do it.

f) Offer your suggestion.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Cremasta

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I'm a big believer of being in close proximity to your target as a way of 'getting the ball rolling'.

Simple stuff like watching tv with the girl, make sure you sit next to her and are somehow touching her. If she doesn't like it she will move away, if you want to take it further, you can follow her and act like you are trying to piss her off (an escape clause if she totally rebuffs your advances).

Control your environment... I hear Calgary is cold, but I'm not sure... but either way, don't put the heaters on, go and get a blanket for you to share.

Keep it simple

Cheers
 

Lost In Translation

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Read Senor Fingers thread on ESCAPING THE FRIEND ZONE

The only problem is that I'm not sure how I should go about letting her know of my 'intentions'. So far, the both of us sometimes go out to party and meet new people. Just to say that she knows that I can handle my own, that is why I believe that she doesn't realize my interest in her.

dude if you are doing everything right and this chick isn't bringing up SEX topics and hinting at SEX WITH YOU when you two are alone or trying to have sex with you. YOU ARE A FRIEND.

trying to kiss her will get you a slap across the face

I've been debating a way that I could go in for the kiss, because that is the one thing that would get me further with this girl. (Keep in mind that we do hang out almost continuously, we have other friends, but for the most part when we are not working we are together)

too much time together. you are not a mystery to her. you are her FRIEND.

I've only recently started to drop subtle hints that I might possibly be attracted to her

has she been dropping hints for you ?

don't break down and tell her you love her

are you trying to make her not like you lol ?

YOU ARE THE PRIZE

are you sure you are hitting her with the right angles ?

and the kino levels between us have been starting to escalate

yeah like what ? you shared a hot chocolate from the same cup ?

But still, I'm not sure if she even thinks of me as a possibility

not good. if you can't tell she wants you. that means she is not giving you the BUYING SIGNALS needed to take this to the next level.

I very well might be too deep in friendzone

i think you are still in the friend zone. but escape is possible. but you gotta run mad game on her.

But to me it is worth the risk.

ok that sounds like someone who has a chick on his mind 24/7

very AFC sounding. cough *oneitis* cough.

Last thing, now that we are mostly established in the new city, we've decided to move in together for July.... just to get out of the hair of the person who was nice enough to give us a place to sleep for the past 2 months.

are you homeless ? please explain ?

dude this chick has been with you all this time and she has not tried to f*ck you then i think you can only escape the friendzone under 2 conditions

1. She is a mad h0 and loves c*ck and jumps you

2. You are Steve McQueen or Senor Fingers and make the great escape from the friendzone


Lost In Translation :D

**AUSTRALIAN STREET PIMP**
 

So pimp its scary

Master Don Juan
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Cremasta - Thanks for the input, already there my man... thing is, I get these buying signals, but then the next day I won't get nothing.

Desdinova - I'm surprised that you would quote the same line that I would have quoted in defense of what you added?

Regardless, you utterly missed the point.

Lost in Translation -

I was expecting this type of reaction, I know the difference between the oneitis situation and the one I am in.

About the sex, we do talk about sex. Actually, we are both quite open about sex.

I would have to agree about the too much time together, but that I can't really change too much because of the living situation.

I wasn't going to 'break down' and declare my feelings, the point of me posting this was to find a way that I could approach the situation that wouldn't be all cheesy 'admitting my love' my approach.

What I meant about the kino thing was, as an example, we'll be grocery shopping and she'll grab my hand to guide me somewhere of interest, or vice versa. Nothing that really gives me anything concrete one way or the other.

What is worth the risk is to go for it and get shot down rather than not go for it and wonder. If the situation didn't allow me the luxury of patience, I wouldn't have asked this type of question. (despite the inevitable flames that would come)

When I moved to calgary, I was givena place to stay with a family friend untill we got ourselves situated and moving out on our own.

I don't think that either points 1 or 2 really apply. I mean all women love to get fvcked, but that was one of the discussions was that she couldn't take that first step (going in for the kiss, etc).

Thank you for your input tho, most of it was slightly off the mark, but I would have made those same assumptions. It is enough that it gives me a good idea of how to approach the situation, at the least.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Lost In Translation

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Escaping The Friend Zone

lol ok i did the work for you because you are a Don Juan

here is the link to the MASTER PLAN so you can hook up with this chick

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=43174&highlight=Escaping+The+Friend+Zone

i got side-tracked. i was going to follow my initial post up with some advice of what i would do

but i am just re-reading Mr Fingers aka Senor Fingers advice

IT IS GOLD and there is nothing i can add to it

have you ever been home alone with this chick + bottle of vodka ?

best of luck :)


Lost In Translation :D

**AUSTRALIAN STREET PIMP**
 

DJDanny

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Originally posted by Cremasta

Control your environment... I hear Calgary is cold, but I'm not sure... but either way, don't put the heaters on, go and get a blanket for you to share.
hey hey now calgarys not that cold... usually... atleast not during the summer, last week not withstanding but hey first time since they built the thing we've had so much rain the dams have literally overflowed. Complain about the drought now mr farmer.

Anyways, as for so pimp.

Theres a couple things you gotta think about here. The fact you are moving in together and the "business" oppourtunity, how would they be affected either way?

Then realize that hey you said yourself there are loads of business oppourtunities in the city and i'm sure you can find another roomate around here so instead of kicking yourself for not going for it give it a shot already.

foir your options i rule out b and c altogether and i don't understand what you mean with d entirely so id choose A or E where just next tme you see her go for it.
 
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