Turned into a jackass.

[Heizen]

I read somewhere on here, while I was perusing the site a while back, that everyone goes through a jackass phase. The phase where you really try to find a balance between C and F, neg hits, and all that good stuff, but become arrogant and a jackass.

That has seemed to happen with me. I have no problem with getting girls now, and getting what I want out of a 'relationship' but it seems my social life has suffered.

I think it is because I use neg hits in every day life with my friends. It gets a good laugh alot of times, but I feel that while it is funny, it is only making me come off worse.

I speak my mind, I usually let people know this. Sometimes I can be harsh, but it is never anything underserving.

IS there any advice you all can offer to overcome this 'jackass' phase? Any person experiences with changing from ass to DJ? I know it will take a while for me to lose my rep as an ass, just as it has taken me 8 weeks to get it, but I want to change.

Overall I have done great. Used to be shy and all that usual ****, but it seems I have swung over to the other side of the spectrum. Help!

 

[Abbott]

How has doing that helped you get women?

I used to be a "nice guy" a long time ago. For the past 2.5 years or so I've been a bit of an assho|e, having even been called an "assho|e" (even a "conceited assho|e") before.

But I still don't get any women.

Ben

 

[MetalFortress]

There's a way to go about it. You see guys and chicks who pick on each other a lot and have fun with it, and you see guys who are just stupid with it and can't attract a chick worth a darn. The difference is if it's mutually known that it's all in fun. You know, "Strictly business, nothing personal". Has to do with rapport.

 

[dietzcoi]

Damn, Metal Fortress, that was your best post ever. Good advice.

Keep it up and keep off the Jesus track!

Dietzcoi

 

[Alpine]

Damn, Metal Fortress, how does it feel to have people licking your arse, even when you state the bloody obvious?

Now I really must stop neg hits, must be a phase I'm going through

 

[mad_monkey59]

It comes with maturity, just ride it out, think about what you are saying next time you do it, and the effect it will have on the person... be cool mate, you'll find a balance near enough.

 

[ScrewIt]

Heizen, learn to deal with it.

Im sure im not coming off as a jackass cause i know my limits, this semester a i dont give a **** attitude surfaced from somewhere in me. i like it.
before that, i used to be pretty self conscious and took comments seriously.

now i can kid around with anyone and be as witty as i want with anyone and am actually quite comfortable with myself.

Yes i may have done a few neg hits to some girls and maybe a few to friends but in a joking manner. But often i dont and i know where to draw the line. it appears they like the new me cause now they cant take me for granted anymore.


You posting this indicates you realize you might be going overboard with your newfound confidence, tha ts a good thing.
just know where to draw the line. and dont let those neg hits feed your ego or else you'll be too far off into the darkside to even realize you're becoming a ****wad. just know when to draw the line before you start insulting others.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

It's just a DJ phase - overcompensating for having been an AFC all your life, most likely, things will even out as you find the right balance for yourself.

 

[00Kevin]

I think the key is just to Joke about her not being important to you.

Here is an example of how I use negative remarks to improve my relationships with women.

After I gave her a christmas gift I said, "Yeah, I needed some hair gel so I thought I would kill two birds with one stone and get you something too."

This drove the girl crazy. She called me up last night and told me that she couldn't belive I said that. She knew I was only joking but part of her thought that it might be true.

the truth is I did needed the Hair Gel and thought it would be best to get her gift from the same plaza.

I also like to claim that I say things (the wrong things ) without realizing it. "Ah man... I can never figure it out when I say the wrong things. Gee... I guess I have to watch how I say things."

This girl told me that I'm full of myself and then said that it is a good thing. "What me? I'm not full of myself am I? That is the first time anyone has ever told me that"

Joking about a girl should not make you a jack ass. If you aremean then yeah. but if you always joke about it and then plea not guilty you will be fine.