"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Turned down sex

The Sperminator

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Yeah I know not don juan but it happened. I actually turned down sex. So anyways quick story I meet a girl we go on a date and the date went great. I mean best date I have ever been on until the very end. We were in the car talking and she got on top of me all of a sudden and then unbuttoned my pants then took hers off. She asked if I had a condom which I did not so she is still ok with it and still wants to have sex she tries to force me to have sex but I refused because I wanted to wear protection. Anyways I stop her and she gets off and says take me home right away. The whole drive home no talking and she just gets out and goes to her house. The next day I text her and get a short response and then I text her again and she does not response at all. What exactly is going through her mind right now? I just wanted to be safe plus I actually really like her and wanted to take it slow this was our first date. How can I recover? I would like to go out again. I would think most girls would respect that but I think she is pissed off.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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zinc4

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she is obviously very very insecure......sounds like a low quality girl to me in general...high quality or even just smart women would refuse sex in the first place no condom with a new guy much less be angry acting toward you about it for being safe.....in fact i would have questioned her on the spot and scolded her for being immature...but what's done is done...
 

The Sperminator

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Whats even stranger is that during the date she was telling me how she doesn't put out for a long time and doesn't like to date a lot bc she thinks most guys are perverts haha. Maybe I'm that charming or she is lying.
 

( . )( . )

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The Sperminator said:
I would think most girls would respect that but I think she is pissed off.
Of course she is. The responsible planners who want to "take it slow" and can't keep the tingler tingling through spontaniety don't usually even get a look in until wayyyyy later when she's ready to get a ring on it. I got to admit if you can turn this one around I'd buy a lottery ticket if I were you.

Whats even stranger is that during the date she was telling me how she doesn't put out for a long time
If she feels the need to verbalize it = she's put out straight away before.
 

The Sperminator

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I keep on leaving out details haha anyways I also mentioned bc she asked that I recently broke up with my gf last month maybe she thinks I still have feeling for her.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Redempti0n

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( . )( . ) said:
Of course she is. The responsible planners who want to "take it slow" and can't keep the tingler tingling through spontaniety don't usually even get a look in until wayyyyy later when she's ready to get a ring on it. I got to admit if you can turn this one around I'd buy a lottery ticket if I were you.
This.

Be spontaneous man.

Also,what possible reason could you possibly have to not own a possible condom ? Are you possibly insane ?
 

whatwg

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Redempti0n said:
This.

Be spontaneous man.

Also,what possible reason could you possibly have to not own a possible condom ? Are you possibly insane ?
Let's assume he ran out the day before and haven't had a chance to buy one.
 

Redempti0n

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That's like assuming he showered the day before and didn't "have time" to shower again today.

Not much of an excuse.
 

Mike32ct

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You would be surprised how many women would go raw given the chance. In the heat of the moment, many don't care. Men have to be the responsible ones.

I don't think you can turn this one around.

In the future, always have a condom with you for any date.

Under the circumstances though, you did the right thing.
 

Purefilth

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Mike32ct said:
You would be surprised how many women would go raw given the chance. In the heat of the moment, many don't care. Men have to be the responsible ones.

I don't think you can turn this one around.

In the future, always have a condom with you for any date.

Under the circumstances though, you did the right thing.
True words.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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The Duke

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The Sperminator said:
Yeah I know not don juan but it happened. I actually turned down sex. So anyways quick story I meet a girl we go on a date and the date went great. I mean best date I have ever been on until the very end. We were in the car talking and she got on top of me all of a sudden and then unbuttoned my pants then took hers off. She asked if I had a condom which I did not so she is still ok with it and still wants to have sex she tries to force me to have sex but I refused because I wanted to wear protection. Anyways I stop her and she gets off and says take me home right away. The whole drive home no talking and she just gets out and goes to her house. The next day I text her and get a short response and then I text her again and she does not response at all. What exactly is going through her mind right now? I just wanted to be safe plus I actually really like her and wanted to take it slow this was our first date. How can I recover? I would like to go out again. I would think most girls would respect that but I think she is pissed off.
I give you props sir. Congrats for sticking to your guns. Most of the wannabee Alpha's on here would not have.

She's upset because she feels rejected. Yes hi quality people would have respected your wishes, but this girl just showed how insecure she and selfish she is.

I'd give her some time, she'll get over her self. Just realize there will be more issues with her in the future. This girl won't make a good candidate for long term success.
 

The Duke

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And girls in general don't care if you have a condom or not. They lack discipline and are easily swept up in their emotions. Don't look for them to be responsible.

Out of about 30 girls, I've only had 1 ever mention anything.
 

Mike32ct

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She feels rejected, AND she feels slutty/dirty.

If you HAD gone for it, she could backwards justify it as "It just happened in the heat of the moment. It was naughty but it FELT RIGHT for BOTH of us."

But since you did the right thing and didn't go for it, she looks at it after the fact (post gina tingles / horny moment) and thinks (with a clear head) "OMG, I was such a dirty hore. I tried to do him raw in the car. I'm soo not normally like that."

My point is she's more upset/ashamed with/of HERSELF than you. So she can't see you again.

Nothing you can do about it.
 

VladPatton

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You did the right thing, I would've done the same. You are NOT the first guy she did this with, guaranteed. You can't risk it. But, from now on just have some latex in the car for next time.

It's hard to pinpoint what she is after. Perhaps she wants to lock down a guy with a kid, you never know. Who cares, man, at least you now have the knowledge you can attract a chick to jump your bones in the car after a date. Be content with that.
 

Who Dares Win

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You guys surealy are better individuals than me, I would have banged her not only to enjoy the ride but also to raise the general notch count, plus I have a very strong animal instinct which pushes me to raw dog girls.

But anyway you're right, OP you did the best thing for sure since you never know how many other guys hit it...maybe she really doesnt put out often or maybe she does.

Did you consider to ask her for a ******* with the promise to reciprocate only to change your mind right after?
I mean an entire date its a hell of an investment nowadays for a guy.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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pdx1138

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Lots of wisdom here. They WILL rawdog at the right opportunity, without thinking of the consequences.

I would have banged her...but then again, I ALWAYS carry protection on a date. And in my cars glovebox in case i forget.

I've ready WAY TOO MANY stories of how a date ended badly for lack of protection to seal the deal.

You NEVER know when a date will end up a lay.
 

JoeMarron

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I would've turned her down as well. If she was willing to go raw with you then you know damn well she's done it with other men. What I would've have done was rewarded her by texting her in the morning after she pouted the whole way home and didn't even bother to say goodnight or thanks for the date. That's where you fked up. Go ghost until she initiates again.
 

VladPatton

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What a second, OP...why couldn't you just of went to a pharmacy to get yourself a bag??? Couldn't you of just time outted her a few minutes until you buy a pack of Trojans then parked on a dark street? Whole thing could've taken 10-12 minutes tops.
 
B

BeDJ

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Did you meet her on POF?

Still waiting on mature DJs to provide a McGyver DIY condom.
 

Bokanovsky

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Why couldn't you just drive to a nearby convenience store and buy some condoms?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

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