Trying so hard not to give up.

[Scormus]

Rebuild

Why not do a 9 to 5 for a year and rebuild your body and soul?

 

[zekko]

I probably should stay out of this but I'll throw my two cents in:

Everyone keeps telling you to keep following you dream and build your business, but it seems like your efforts are constantly disappointing you. Maybe you just need to get into a different line of work. Being an entrepreneur isn't for everybody. When I was in my 20s, I had two different "dreams" that I had that I was following, neither of which panned out for me. I realized that they weren't working so I went on to something else.

That doesn't mean you have to be stuck into a dead end job forever, necessarilly. Find something with some room for advancement, if you can. Or that provides valuable experience.

Life isn't perfect for anyone and you can't expect work to be all pleasure and light. They call it work for a reason. In the US, and on this forum, everybody tries to sell you on this "I love my job, I love what I'm doing" type of thing, but honestly, I look around me in real life and I see damn few people who can really say that. And even for those that do, I bet there are mornings when they don't want to get up and do it. Most of us have to work, they call it labor for a reason. It is what it is.

 

[logicallefty]

My advise on this thread to the OP is to keep reading this thread and others on this site and lean on us for support as much as you need to. Know that if we all pulled out of the lowest sh!t pits of our lives, you can too. We are all fish in the same pond. Look at all of us who have been where you are and pulled through it. I have posted my story about loosing my job as a cop and marrying a bigamist so no need to repeat it. I would bet my own hard earned cash that in a year from now your life WILL be turned around for the better. Please don't give up.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Warrior,
You have been here long enough to remember Jophil,he should be your role model,he lived with Terminal Cancer and in his dying weeks was still providing great advice to the younger guys out there.

 

[Tictac]

Do two things each day, no matter how small, to improve your situation.

That's all it will take.

 

[Mr.Positive]

Warrior,

There is all type of winners and losers, and everyone is different, what you need to do, is find out what direction to take to start stacking some wins.

Giving up is not losing. If you give up on a losing situation, to focus on going after a possible winning situation.

I'm learning how to surf, for example, and it is the toughest challenge I could possibly face. Body rattling wipeouts, to end up back on the beach, looking out, and paddling back out again. Only to see others catching waves.

But the advise is this, the best surfer is the one who's having the most fun out there.

I met a guy the other day, he told me he tried to learn to surf for 20 years. He said he could never get it, didn't have the balance and coordination, so what was he doing when I met him? Having a blast and catching waves. He wasn't surfing, he got himself a bodyboard, and some fins, and paddled out to have some fun.

You could look at him as a loser at surfing, he could never get it, so what he did was change his thought process, and focused on something he could get. Bodyboarding, and he was having just as much, if not more fun, then the surfers out there. He was a winner, just a different kind of one.

So, change how you think about winning and losing. Focus on the positive things, even small ones, and like others have said. Start stacking some small wins in your life, and to do that, you may need to change directions.

Will I ever win at surfing? I don't know, I could take a beating for the next 20 years, or at some point, I may just grab a bodyboard and enjoy some of those waves a different way.

 

[guru1000]

Mental self-note to which to refer back, but also befitting for this thread:

In the last six months, I have lost:

1. <Removed for confidentiality>
2. ''
3. ''
4. ''
5. ''

But these foregoing “alleged handicaps”—as social conventions would have us believe--failed to stop my investing 14-hour days at the office and my continuing to push forward. Every day, I add another arsenal in my “life artillery” by trying something new, outside of my “box.”

I’m not swayed by circumstance, as I disown conventional belief systems which label circumstances as good or bad. “Good” and “bad” are abstract terms indoctrinated by societal conventions to enslave our thought process. By disowning circumstance from the positive/negative, good/bad scale, you become free; enfranchised from societal chains. I am as water: no form, no shape, no opinion, no belief systems to define my abstract thoughts. I am not emotionless; I am not cynical; I am not bitter. I am solely thoughts, subsequent action, with no abstract “labels” placed on the end result. Accordingly, I cannot be crushed.

Fate can’t oppress me, nor do I use these alleged social failures as a crutch to self-deprecate.

 

[Willard]

I first came on this site first to deal with the girl I was seeing at the time, then after we broke up I came back to learn better ways to meeet new girls. While doing that I started reading books recomended by David Deangelo and others. This led me to read success books and psychology books, after that my whole life changed for the better.

Now I have a good idea how the human mind works, both the female and male mind. Your mind can be retrained to make a person happpier and appreciate living in the moment.

It takes hard work but the payoff is you never get depressed, you might feel bad about a particular bad decision but you realize whats doen is done and learn from it.

I have my own business and I make enough to pay my bills, go out a couple of times a week, go on a few vacations and drive a nice paid for car. I don't have more clients because I am happier with the free time, I get to work out lay in the sun and do whatever I want.

I was really depressed at one time in my life, the situation was probably worse than yours, now 5 years later, I'm the happiest I've ever been at 46 years old.

I owe this to constant self improvement, I read and listen to books and audiotapes all the time and I eat very well and exercise aa lot.

I hope you pick up a book about success and read it, very few people are really successful both financially and personally, I read about 20%. These people constantly read success books and always seek to improve themselves.

 

[evan12]

I probably should stay out of this but I'll throw my two cents in:

Everyone keeps telling you to keep following you dream and build your business, but it seems like your efforts are constantly disappointing you. Maybe you just need to get into a different line of work. Being an entrepreneur isn't for everybody. When I was in my 20s, I had two different "dreams" that I had that I was following, neither of which panned out for me. I realized that they weren't working so I went on to something else.

That doesn't mean you have to be stuck into a dead end job forever, necessarilly. Find something with some room for advancement, if you can. Or that provides valuable experience.

Life isn't perfect for anyone and you can't expect work to be all pleasure and light. They call it work for a reason. In the US, and on this forum, everybody tries to sell you on this "I love my job, I love what I'm doing" type of thing, but honestly, I look around me in real life and I see damn few people who can really say that. And even for those that do, I bet there are mornings when they don't want to get up and do it. Most of us have to work, they call it labor for a reason. It is what it is.

Agreed , the OP work in some kind of marketing/sale job , these jobs are very unpredictable and make the person very stressed when he cant get customers or make sale because that mean no money .

 

[backbreaker]

I really do not believe in success books, just like I don't believe in game books for the most part. Because it all starts to contradict itself.


I've learned pretty much to just be open minded about the path I'm taking. Pay close attention to my mindset, how I feel about things, what works, what doesn't, adjust accordingly.


Generally speaking when the world is going against me, it's because I'm swimming the wrong way lol. It's no different than gaming in that regard. If all your clients are telling you bye, come up with a different game plan that works. Whatever you've been doing, obviously is not working in the sense that it's not getting you where you want to go.

 

[guru1000]

If you are an entrepreneur you have your clients who pay you and are your bosses. There IS no "independence."

Absolutely. I would even go further and say with a 9-5, you are free 16 hours a day--and weekends. An entrepreneur has no freedom; he/she is slave to the business 24 hours a day--every day.

 

[backbreaker]

Absolutely. I would even go further and say with a 9-5, you are free 16 hours a day--and weekends. An entrepreneur has no freedom; he/she is slave to the business 24 hours a day--every day.

at this very moment.. wifey is tipsy, giving me the "look", got my fav perfume on and everything lol. she's ready to rock and roll. what is backbreaker doing? putting together a proposal for a client at 10pm and about to hop on a conference call with a client in vegas to make sure we're on the same page about another project.

Millie is a trooper. she goes to be horny at least once a week. doesn't complain, doesn't give me any lip, doesn't stray, just sucks it up (not literally lol) and is patient.

There are times i wish that i could just shut it down at 5 like normal people. That's why I say, entrepreneur ship is not for everyone. it's not for most people

Saturday is the one day of the week IDGAF about business. I'm going Call of Duty on that ass tomorrow night lol.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Relax have a you day, meditate for 20 or 30 minutes. Everything happens for a reason

 

[backbreaker]

I have no doubt he's depressed. I see a shrink once every other thursday and in the years htat I have seen her, she has not once told me antyhing that actually helps me with my issues. Basically I go in there and just vent and come out lol.

Every "answer" that I came up with I had to realize myself.


At the end of the day, YOU have to account for YOU and get YOU out of YOUR situation.

 

[Rubirosa]

Great replies in this thread..........

Always remember that what you did yesterday is a reflection of where you are today.

Sometimes you do the right thing, and you still will be treated unfairly by the A$$holes of the World. This is a part of life. You can vent your frustrations, and your friends will listen, but the window of opportunity for complaining closes fast.


All my life, I've felt like a loser. I always feel like I'm standing in the street, looking at a house party, full of lights, laughter, and fun...A place where the winners are enjoying themselves.....While I stand alone in the dark street.....

I then realize that I have to have my own party.

 

[user43770]

You need a new mission, my friend. In the short-term, you should set small goals and achieve them, but you should always keep bigger goals to strive for and look forward to. The key to happiness is having something to look forward to.

 

[user43770]

And as Rubirosa said, great posts by everyone.

 

[Mr.Positive]

One thing I can tell you, is your poor attitude comes through in all aspects of your life. Negativity scares people off.

Golden, and the inverse is true as well. Happy people invite other happy people into their lives naturally.

Warrior, any thoughts on all this great advise in this thread? Updates?

Great posts, folks. It's inspiring.

 

[Night-hawk]

There's no completion in life, man. You never stop creating.

...

Once more into the fray
Into the last good fight I'll ever know
Live and die on this day
Live and die on this day

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JMjy_JrdO4E

 

[Demodulate]

edit....